It appears as though shit has officially hit the fan. September is behind us, which means we’re no longer adjusting to getting back to school and as a matter of fact are just in it. The squeaky smell of new is fading like smoke in open air and we are left to confront nothing but the truth — we’re all alone and we’re all going to die.
Just kidding. We’re fine. One of the most valuable lessons my dad ever taught is that life is about adjustment, and that adjusting is easy; it’s a condition baked into the mechanism of being alive. So we’re here and adjusted, right? Ready to roll and start anew for the second time in two months with a theme that will blow the socks out of your loafers because nothing says, “I’ll have a glass of your most expensive wine,” like knighting yourself with the title of grown-ass woman. One of the coolest parts of being human, in addition to that stuff about adjusting, is that we’re always changing — learning, developing — and are thus in a constant state of evolutionary grown-assness, which is we’re celebrating grown-ass women this month.
Of course, we do that all the time — so what makes this month different from the other ones? Nothing, really, save for the flashlight we’re beaming on all the permutations that being a grown-ass woman can take. Because until this point, the title has felt somewhat binary: are you only grown ass when you can pay your own bills? Run your own company? Call your grandmother without her prodding? But hello! It’s 2016, and growing up means different things for all of us.
So if you…
Made and did not a cancel a dentist appointment
Paid your cell phone bill late
Are using real plates instead of plastic ones for the first time at home
Still eat with your hands by conscious choice
Drank only one glass of wine at dinner
Drank all the wine at dinner
Picked up your dry cleaning on time
Forgot where you left your dry cleaning
Asked about the soup special
Only ate jelly beans
Called your mom once this week
Called your mom every hour yesterday
Are newly engaged
Are newly single
Congratulations! You’re a grown-ass woman and this month, we’re celebrating the F out of that. So while we’re here, let’s use the space below to deposit thoughts on the following: When did you know you were a grown-ass woman? Hit me with it and hit me hard.
Photographed by Krista Anna Lewis; creative direction by Emily Zirimis.