What’s the Grossest Thing You’ve Googled?

Google Search is used for three things.

1) Reminding web users of important holidays — both local and international (although it’s not a good source for your more esoteric opportunities for celebration)

2) Casual stalking

[CHIX Productions]

And 3) Looking up gross stuff

I’m a shameless gross googler. If you tell me something about the human body that I do not believe, I will look it up that second — right in front of you, right in front of the entire restaurant congregation, even if my phone is somehow connected to the bar’s TV.

I once spent a good half hour learning about amniotic sacs. I’ll gladly research your rash. When I learned about koalas and their bifurcated penises, first I needed visuals, then I needed to know if using the word “penii” was ever grammatically correct — even in the case of peen bifurcation. It is not!

Then I looked up koala chlamydia. Image search. Had to know.

Female koalas have two vaginas, by the way. Kangaroos have three. Does this even count as gross? I find it fascinating. And thanks to Man Repeller’s non-corporate computer policy plus a dedicated friend who has been preemptively hand-selected to delete my personal device search history in case of an emergency, my list — like this world’s many wonders — goes on.

What I absolutely cannot handle is anything involving blood. No broken bones. NOTHING to do with with ingrown hairs. Nothing disturbing. Despite qualifications of “gross” I still like to think of the world as a rainbow.

So now it’s your turn. The cursor is pointing at you, my friends. Tell us the grossest thing(s) you’ve Google-searched. You just may make a fellow gross-Googler’s day.

Photographed by Krista Anna Lewis. YouTube video by the very funny CHIX Productions


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