Funny Fridge: Deviled Eggs and Dog Food
08.26.15

Cara Santana is an actress, a lifestyle blogger and the CEO of her beauty-on-demand app (which you can download here). Culinary skills, however, are not her forte. “I like to blame the no-cooking thing on my schedule,” she told The Food Life’s Lauren Levinger, “but I think it’s really just because I never learned. I have heard that if you can read, you can cook. So, one day!”

Certain members of the MR team attest that it can be as easy as reading the directions (Leandra), but certain members also understand there’s no point in cooking when you can just buy pickles (Amelia). Santana makes a strong case for the latter theory with this week’s fridge, and whether or not you like mayo, you’ll at least be intrigued by the eclectic choice of chilled contents below. Here’s what we learned.

1. Doubt unproven scientific theories, but don’t discount water as an accessory.

Not your average water: "I like boxed water because you don't have to worry about potentially getting cancer from melting plastic (which studies have shown can create carcinogens). Who wants to worry about cancer when you are drinking water? As for the Blk Water, I just cut my hair really short. I have bangs now, and I think it’s a more rock-and-roll vibe. I feel more edgy -- the Blk Water goes with that. But in all seriousness, I think that it is alkaline induced, which I don’t really know exactly what that means, but I hear it’s good for you."

“I just cut my hair really short — I have bangs now, so it’s a lot more of a rock-and-roll vibe. I feel edgy, and I think the Blk Water goes with that. But in all seriousness, I think it’s alkaline induced, which I don’t really know exactly what that means, but I hear it’s good for you.”

2. Never underestimate the power of chips and dip.

“I don’t cook, but I do entertain, which means I still have to be able to feed people. Tostitos seems like the most concise and efficient way of doing it with the least amount of work. Serve the Tostitos with dip, and you’ve just created an environment where people are eating and interacting without you having to do anything. The guacamole, however, I make myself.”

3. Pickle juice photographs surprisingly well.

"It’s embarrassing that we have the empty pickle jar in there. The mayo is for my boyfriend Jesse -- I don’t fuck with condiments, it’s just not my jam." Jelly, however... "The PB&J is an homage to my palate which is that of a five year old. I like the creamy, not crunchy kind. I am not the gal you take to the five star restaurant because inevitably I will order the spaghetti and meatballs. Everyone makes fun of me because I'm turning thirty, having a huge birthday at the house and I ordered a grilled cheese truck. It’s a cocktail party with grilled cheese."

“It’s actually embarrassing that we have the empty pickle jar in there. We go to the farmers market every Sunday on Melrose place, and there is this guy who makes his own pickles. They’re the best thing ever.”

4. If there’s no ketchup, is it even a fridge?

Yes. “I don’t fuck with condiments, it’s just not my jam. The mayo is for my boyfriend, Jesse.”

5. However! Even if you think it’s gross, mayo comes in handy

“I make deviled eggs for my boyfriend — it’s fool proof. You boil an egg, which you can google how to do, scoop the yolk out, add mayo, mustard and pepper, mash it up and then put it back in the egg.”

6. Ice cream is a dietary staple, but freezers aren’t just for ice cream.

Guess what this is? Hint: not more ice cream. "The freezer is reserved for the dogs. They eat better than I do. Shout-out to Pure Dog Food. It’s pre-made and frozen. They have tuna, chicken and beef versions with quinoa, carrots, celery inside. It’s like a salad, but for your dog. I buy so much of it because on the weeks I don’t go grocery shopping, I just eat the dog food. Kidding! But in the beef one there are pasta noodles, so I have been tempted."

“The freezer is reserved for the dogs. They eat better than I do. Shout-out to Pure Dog Food. It’s pre-made and frozen. They have tuna, chicken and beef versions with quinoa, carrots and celery inside. It’s like a salad, but for your dog. I buy so much of it because on the weeks I don’t go grocery shopping, I just eat the dog food. Kidding! But in the beef one there are pasta noodles, so I have been tempted.”

Images by Lauren Levinger of The Food Life. Follow her on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter.

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