Ask a French Girl About Wine
08.27.15

Our resident French Girl is back; staunch as ever in her love of brunch, as French as ever when it comes to romance, as confused as the rest of us when it comes to digital romance. In our most recent story with Laura, we spoke about summer and ended the conversation on the topic of wine. But you can’t be expected to have just one glass, right? Not with a friend this fun. So we poured another and let the questions continue…

Is there a right and wrong way to order wine?

The right way is to say, “Please,” and with a smile. The wrong way is to order wine before noon — it is way too early.

Do you actually try to “party” with wine, like get drunk off of it?

You enjoy wine. When it’s good, you can end up drinking enough that it gets you tipsy, although it is quite known that red puts you to sleep. I wouldn’t be able to party with red. I would be enjoying it too much and forget to dance.

Do you think rosé is lame?

Rosé is beautiful.

What about wine for a certain event or time of day? Lunch, dinner, party?

There is no such thing as a “lunch wine” or “night wine.” The food is what’s deciding for you. No matter if it’s day or night, when you eat a big steak, you’ll want a a strong red to keep it company. Do you have one SPF cream for the pool, and another for the beach? No, it depends on the sun. Same thing.

Do you follow wine rules? Like: red with steak, white with fish? 

I like my steak with red and a lighter meal with white, but it’s not so much about rules as it is about common sense because of their core acidity and flavors.

I’m at a restaurant, I don’t recognize any of these wines on the list. I’m embarrassed to ask, but want a glass. What do I do?

Ask yourself what you’re in the mood for when it comes to taste, then tell your waiter. Part of the beauty of wine is that there is always something to discover. Unlike chicken. How many different chickens have you eaten?

It is completely fine to not know anything on the wine list. It’s also not rude or “cheap” to get the house wine when you are in a restaurant.

Do you cringe when we mispronounce French/Italian wine labels in an attempt to sound French or Italian?

I believe in the saying, “When in Rome, do as the Romans,” however, I never pretend I know how to grammatically and rapidly order an American non-fat cappuccino with soy milk in a size grande with foam. But mispronouncing the label of an Italian or French wine is not a big deal, as long as you get what you ordered.

Does anything besides my questions bug you about the way Americans order wine?

Nothing bothers me about the way Americans order wine. It would be like me annoying an Italian person when I ask for pasta al pomodoro. Haha! Maybe they are annoyed, actually.

NO-WINE

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