These Bright Clothes Look Like Pop-Tarts In My Cart

Well hip, hip hooray for me: here comes the existential crisis of personal style that you’ve definitely not been waiting for but may have been predicting. WHO AM I AND WHY AM I PUTTING THESE THINGS IN MY CART? It’s all so colorful. It looks like a box of Pop-Tarts up in here. None of this totally feels like “me” but then again, when you’re trying to continue your steady denial about the gray season ahead, rational online decision-making is a moot point. The point is to consume as many sugary breakfast options (in the form of clothing) as possible. So like…this Yazbukey “Summer” sweatshirt went in faster than my mom could say I didn’t need another one. This Rosie Assoulin checkered top got tossed in because should there be a picnic blanket, I want to match it.

My head is cold all winter long so truly, this Eugenia Kim rainbow pom-pom beanie is wildly practical. And it will make me easier to spot on crowded subways. This Topshop triangle bra gets a nod because the girls deserve to feel some joy too — especially when they’re off duty and out of the lingerie  I strapped them into. Speaking of the girls, how about this Anya Hindmarch “Babe” sticker?

I could always use a good bag to put my actual candy in, and this Otley pouch is less than 50 bucks. WHAT! On the lower end of my spending spectrum: these Topshop tube socks to wear with a pair of Vans, maybe? (Little brother-style.) And for when I want to ramp it up, you know — really make lemonade out of those chilly winter lemons — these Dolce & Gabbana sandals. They’re on sale. I swear that if I took a bite they’d taste like a breakfast pastry.


You might wanna think about dressing like Diane Keaton.

Collages by Maria Jia Ling Pitt; follow her on Instagram @heysuperstar.

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