The Best App for a Lazy Schlepper

I live in a fifth floor walk up.

When I have guests over, the first thing they say to me by the time they reach my door is never “Hello,” but always, “I can’t breathe.”

Then they collapse in a dramatic pile while asking how I walk up five flights of stairs every day.

My answer is always, “It’s easy.” Five flights are not that big a deal. I grew up on top of a giant San Francisco hill — going up a few steps is child’s play. Sometimes I meet the Seamless delivery guy halfway just to prove my own stair-loving fitness.

Perhaps this is why my friends find it utterly perplexing that if I leave a sweater at someone’s apartment on the Upper East Side, I refuse to return uptown to claim it. So long, sweater. You were cool.

Or, if I borrow a friend’s coat who lives in Chelsea, I have to lure her to my den with the promise of wine, cheese and an interpretive dance so that she handles the retrieve.

Come to think of it, I don’t like going to the post office either.

I am also admittedly violently lazy.

But luckily for me, there’s an app for all of that which I cannot bear to schlep. It’s called Shipster, and it is a godsend. It’s helped me reclaim all of my once-abandoned belongings scattered throughout the city and return that which I’ve hoarded.

It’s also great when your roommate forgets his keys and neither of you agrees to budge.

Shipster — currently based out of New York — works much in the same way Uber does. Plug in your address and a messenger arrives to pick up or drop off. Of note: the pricing is always cheaper than if I’d taken a cab to and from the errand (because haha, no subways for this paycheck-shredding sloth).

Here is where Uber differs until they invent black SUVs that can fly: Shipster will deliver your crap anywhere in the world. Immediately. Or as fast as humanly-plus-airplane-ly possible. I find that mind-boggling.

I know there’s been systems in place like this for years (UPS, FedEx, ever heard of them?) but never before have they come to my house at the press of a button and then saved my life just an hour later.

One time, a Shipster messenger completed a really important drop off for me on Halloween while dressed like robot, and he brought me candy.

You guys, that is magic.

Download it here.

Speaking of which: this week’s Writers Prompt is about dream apps. Tell us about your dream creation here

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  • Gotta check out this app. Sounds pretty amazing!


    This sounds like Magic!


  • Cinamaron

    Um okay that is amazing. I am also chronically lazy and would love a magic robot w/candy to come to my door and get stuff for me. Unfortunately I don’t live in NYC :/

  • AlwaysMe

    How. Why. You know what – doesn’t matter. Downloading right now. Thanks for the pro-tip!


  • Allie Fasanella

    This is so dope. I don’t know how you do stairs though, girl. I had to walk up 7 flights to get to my apartment in Rome this summer and by that time I would just lay in front of the door gasping for breath until one of my roommates heard me and opened the door. Drama. This app seems like a totally GH (gotta have).

  • Sounds fantastic! Totally feel you on the walk up, by the way. Loved proving my toughness by bounding up and down the stairwell. Walking to the grocery store? Not so much.

  • Andrew Chunis

    I will check on this one…

  • Aren’t we all just incredibly lazy..