In My Cart: Marc Jacobs Made Dr. Scholl’s Shoes for $352

And I could not help but pull the g-dang trigger yesterday when above better judgement — that is: the fact that I will no doubt be incapable of wearing these for at least another three months (I am decidedly impatient and thus render anything unusable in the present tense unusable in perpetuity) — I paid $352 dollars to own them.

Will I try wearing them with striped metallic socks to soften the blow of end-of-February? Yes.

Is there a justification system in place given the fact that I could have just purchased the actual Dr. Scholl’s for like, $80? Duh — it might not make sense, but it’s there.

On the one hand, there is the very frank reality that crystal buckles are almost reason enough to do anything. Including hike Mount Everest in a bikini and clogs, for example. So, are these expensive buckles? Yes. But when considering both cost-per-wear and wear-per-feel, they’re also technically free.

Wear-per-feel, by the way, is that thing where every time you put something on you feel like a pop star vacationing on the Spanish Riviera. Priceless.

Justification #2: Fashion is cool because it takes literal, utilitarian objects like a pair of podiatrist-recommended shoes and turns them into a flight of fancy. A reason to get out of bed. Ancient Greek Sandals had the right idea last summer when they rolled out their “Filia” shoe, which I got and nurtured until! One day toward the end of August they disappeared (read: one fell out of my overnight bag without my realizing it until three hours too late). I thought about buying them again but they were a) sold out and b) the season was ending. At this point, I think I can comfortably just add another $60 to the $290 and call it highway robbery all the same, no?

And finally, there’s this: given the fact that I anticipate making questionable outfitting choices all spring long — see: capri pants (and I do mean capri pants) and half zips, I may as well go aLL oUtTtT~!~t, no?

Join me — it’ll be fun! What’s the worst that could happen?

(Don’t answer that.)

Collage by Emily Zirimis


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  • Rhia B.

    Not surprised Marc Jacobs is making these for the next step in the classic ugly shoe reinvention. And there goes my originality! I’ve owned the original Dr. Scholl’s for like, 10 years and I love ’em to bits (literally, the rubber soles need to be replaced). They go with everything: cropped jeans, short skirts, cutoffs, sequins, fancy stuff, bathing suits, tuxedo pants. And the adjustable buckle means you can put on a thick sock with them in winter, and tighten for your bare feet in summer. I’d say go for the $80 originals so you can afford to buy a rainbow assortment of colors.

  • nygirltrappedinfl

    Those are adorable and I will justify your insanely over priced shoe purchase if you justify mine…..for some reason these candy colored sandals are calling to me…..

  • Orthopedic

    Still own 1st pair for over 20yrs. Paid 10 bucks. Love the sole so much that im willing to get made fun of when they’re not trending, which is most of the time.

  • Deana

    I adore Marc and love his nod to Scholl’s as I have been a fan for years (navy, gold – uh yeah they’re awesome – and white).

    I had feeling they were going to trend. At the end off last summer I was riding my bike in the ‘hood while wearing my white pair (scored at the Thrift – unworn) and a car dove slowly by and two very fashion aware guys shouted out “Love those shoes!”

  • Hello, mom shoes from 2002 that your 12 year old daughter will also want to match her juicy couture sweatsuit/jean mini skirt, Return to Tiffany’s heart tag choker and chunky blonde highlights. My gut feeling is that I can only love these shoes ironically/nostalgically, but the oncoming trend bombardment will convince me that these are truly beautiful and I will want them.