If you, like me, have had the haunting theme song from Big Little Lies stuck in your head since the finale last April, then you have probably already watched the new teaser trailer for season two. If you haven’t, please do so immediately because I have so many questions than I ever thought possible about 1 minute and 9 seconds of footage:
Let’s dive right in, shall we?
1. Who in tarnation is this cute surfer with the curly hair similar to that of my favorite baby I follow on Instagram? My guess is that he’s a potential love interest for Jane a.k.a. Shailene, given how flirty his eyeballs are being in their extremely brief encounter, but who’s to say! I’m here to make friends, not predictions. Plus, I read the book Big Little Lies before watching the first season so I had some sense of where the plot was headed, but in the case of season two, I’m entirely incapable of legitimate spoilers.
2. Is it just me, or does the moniker “The Monterey Five” give you alarming flashbacks to middle school cliques? There were two in my class, and yes, they surely did invent names for themselves. I seem to recall that one was called “The Fab Five” and the other “The Significant Seven.” (I’m not even close to kidding, but slightly closer than I ever was to being part of a named clique).
3. MERYLLLLLL!!!!!!!! Okay, I know that’s not a question, but as you might suspect I’m actually contractually obligated as a writer and a human to proclaim Meryl Streep’s name in capital letters and followed by not one but eight exclamation points no matter the format of what I’m supposed to be scribing. Here’s a question, though: How many hands were shaken and champagne bottles popped at HBO headquarters when Mary Louise “Meryl” Streep signed on for the second season of a show that originally wasn’t supposed to continue past the first?
4. Should Zoe Kravitz consider retiring from acting so she can make bank as someone who professionally stares into people’s souls for a living? I’m not sure what the appropriate description for this career path is, but I would pay good money for 30 minutes of uninterrupted eye contact with her.
5. What happened to Adam Scott a.k.a. Ed’s beard? Did he find out about Madeline’s affair and shave it off in dramatic retaliation? Is there going to be an entire storyline about her begging him to grow it back? Is it weird that I’m more curious about that than the sudden appearance of bangs on Jane?
6. Does anyone else feel like the ratio of waves crashing over rocks to actual information about the show in this trailer is weighted in the former’s direction to the extent that it would conceivably make good fodder for bedtime viewing? My insomnia wants to know.
7. What questions about the trailer, or the second season in general, are keeping you up at night? I suggest depositing them in the comment section below, and then fast-forwarding to 0:38 for a particularly soothing wave-crashing sequence. Sweet dreams! (But also, is it time for lunch yet?)
Photo by Jennifer Clasen via HBO.