Jenna Lyons is Selling a Ton of Her Clothes and I’m Panicking

You know that “icebreaker” question where you’re asked which five people you’d invite to a hypothetical fantasy dinner party? I’ve always hated trying to answer that. Even after four different jobs, three different schools and two different sleepaway camp experiences (i.e. fertile ground for icebreakers), I have yet to perfect my hypothetical fantasy dinner party list.

Instead, I wish someone would ask me the names of five people whose closets I would like to hypothetically raid. That list has been perfected for years: Diana Ross, Patricia Field, Donna Summer, Miss Piggy and Jenny Lyons.

To clarify: these are the names of five people whose closets I would like to hypothetically raid in my wildest fantasies (which is why I included a muppet). Imagine my surprise, then, when I learned I could raid one of their closets FOR REAL.

That’s right!!! The wardrobe of Jenna Lyons, former Creative Director of J.Crew and forever style icon, is currently available to shop in this lifetime (a.k.a. immediately) on The RealReal.

Let that information sink in. Okay. Are you thinking what I’m thinking? Trick question, because I’m thinking about two things and one of them is lunch, but I’m also thinking about how I need to approach this unprecedented opportunity with great strategy and care, especially since a ton of her stuff has already sold out and I’m fully panicking as a result. Below, please find the fruits of my diligence: an artfully curated list of the seven best things to shop from the proffered contents of her wardrobe, accompanied by Jenna Lyons-inspired outfit ideas to wear them with because WHEN IN ROME, you know?

1. A Marc Jacobs Striped Tweed Jacket

To be worn with patterned trousers and a trench coat draped around your shoulders like a cape. None of that arms-in-sleeves business allowed.

2. An Altuzarra Embellished Metallic Sweater

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To be worn with a feathered, floor-length ball skirt, naturally.

3. A J.Crew Sequined Knee-Length Skirt

To be worn with a crisp white button down for ultimate day-to-night satisfaction.

4. A J.Crew Abstract Jacquard Skirt

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To be worn with a neon orange crewneck t-shirt.

5. A Pair of 3.1 Phillip Lim High-Rise Suspender Pants

To be worn with a tuxedo shirt, a bow moonlighting as a bowtie and thick-rimmed glasses.

6. A Derek Lam Hooded Silk Dress

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To be worn with a brooch-adorned cargo vest.

7. A pair of Gianvito Rossi Artemis Lace-Up Sandals

To be worn with metallic pants and a striped boat neck top.

Tell me what you’re eyeing, and then tell me the five people whose closets YOU would want to raid.

Photo by Gilbert Carrasquillo/GC Images via Getty Images.

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  • Julia

    Miss Piggy – really good choice but caused me to laugh out loud in class

  • Austen

    Omg closet raid picks…Kendall Jenner, Rihanna, Shay Mitchell, Kerry Washington and Serena van der Woodsen. She may be fictional but that Prada is real!!

    • Davida

      Tavi Gevinston, Kate Moss, Spencer Hastings (from PLL), Gigi Hadid and Leandra Medine!!! Now I’m lost in a daydream of closet raiding…

  • Kate

    My top 5 dream closet raids: Rihanna, Alexa Chung, Kali Uchis, Janelle Monae, and any girl who gets on the L train at the Jefferson stop.

    • girlatjeffersonstop

      I AM A GIRL WHO GETS ON THE L TRAIN AT JEFFERSON! I feel very cool now.

  • shayna gonsalves

    Jamie Beck, Andi Potamkin, Nitsan Raiter, Danielle Nachmani, Violette.

    I thought I was over my closet, but now I know I am.

    • Sarah Hassan

      Jaime Beck, moi aussi! I adore her look so. My picks 1. Catherine Baba 2. Dita Von Teese 3. Jaime Beck 4. Traci Ellis Ross 5. The Olsen Twins (In my fantasy, they share one closet) Lord, that was satisfying.

  • Christina Van L

    Simon Doonan, Olivia Palermo, Carrie Bradshaw, Audrey Hepburn and of course, Jenna Lyons.

  • Cheyenne P.

    Tracee Ellis Ross, Aurora James, Carrie Bradshaw, Chloe x Halle & SZA.

  • Nikelle

    There is a pair of tweed high rise pants in there that I would love, also the yellow sequined J Crew top. That leather fringe jacket by Chloé that already sold is real wonderful.

    Do Bong Soon (in the Korean tv show “Strong Woman Do Bong Soon”), Blair Waldorf, Haley Nahman, Any of the men at Pitti Uomo, my friend Erica.

  • rhonda compton

    i would be satisfied with harling’s lavender coat.

  • cdawgcoop

    2nd paragraph, you have her named as Jenny Lyons. Which is actually a bit funny, because she soooo does not come across as a Jenny 🙂

  • dadagal

    This was a fun assignment: Tilda Swinton, Linda Rodin, Sofia Coppola, Jenny Walton, Jenna Lyons.

    • Ema Dell’Orto

      Of course Sofia Coppola, I forgot her !!!

  • Charleen Taveras

    Leandra (Medine) Cohen, Celine Dion, Iris Apfel, SJP, KJenner, Jenna Lyons, Olivia Palermo etc.. (i could go all day) in no particular order.

  • Autumn

    Haley Nahman, Pernille Teisbaek, Pharrell, Zanna Roberts Rossi, Viviana Volpicella

    • dadagal

      Oh yes, Pharrell! Wish I had thought of him.

  • my closet raids: Jesse Kamm, No Doubt era Gwen Stefani, the entire cast of Call Me By Your Name – males and females, SZA, and any woman featured on the apiece apart blog.

  • Tracee Ellis Ross, Rihanna, SZA, Vanessa Hudgens, Solange

  • Cynthia Schoonover

    Definitely Miss Piggy. I’ve always admired her clothes-she even wears Kate Spade!

  • Allegra

    Tracee Ellis Ross, Zendaya, Carrie Bradshaw, Blair Waldorf, Tamu McPhearson!

  • Morgan

    Agree with most people on here with Tracee Ellis Ross (insert heart eyes), Al Pacino as Serpico (omg, the accessories), Zoë Kravitz (duh), Maria Kochetkova (principle dancer with San Francisco Ballet with a wonderfully humorous street style – her Instagram handle is balletrusse), and Haley Nahman (that detachable hood = genius)

    • tinygoldenpins

      Serpico! I love it!

    • Kiks

      Thank you for Maria Kochetkova. Delightful!

  • Emily M

    Firstly- Leandra!!!
    And then Zendaya, Stella von Senger und Etterlin, Eva Chen, and Rihanna. Aaaand Kim Kardashian because I’m just so curious and honestly some of her clothes look like they’d be weirdly comfy.

    • I thought about including a Kardashian! I think we’d be remiss to leave them out.

    • Cristina

      I am so in love with Diane Keaton!! Acting an style.

    • silla

      So agree re weirdly comfy

  • Natalie Hedberg

    Oh my goodness best assignment ever…let’s see: Blair Waldorf, Olivia Palermo, Meghan Markle, Olivia Pope, Blake Lively. Shocked I’m the first to bring up the newest princess-to-be…her style is classic, elegant, relaxed, and polished. Absolutely stunning!

  • me

    Olivia Pope;
    Audrey Hepburn;
    Kate Middleton;
    Grace Kelly in any Hitchcock flick;
    Kristin Scott Thomas in The English Patient !

  • 1. Leandra obvi… 2. My biggest girlcrush and style inspo at the moment: danish stylist Emili Sindlev, look her up on Instagram!! (@emilisindlev) and get ready to become OBSESSED. 3. Kim Kardashian because… Because.. 4. @linneklund on Instagram, Swedish blogger(?) always FUN outfits! 5. Mary-Kate & Ashley Olsen (They count as one, right?) because a gal needs good basics.

  • Ema Dell’Orto

    Not to fantaisist so that would be : La Brindille (oss), Diane Kruger, Charlotte Gainsbourg (for all her Nicolas Ghesquière things), Emmanuelle Alt (her blazers) and then…

    • Ema Dell’Orto

      I would end up with like 100 white t-shirts so I could add Leandra to spice everything,

  • Kasey

    Of the select few things left, I love the dip dye Dries Van Noten jacket.

    I’d love to raid the closets of 80s-90s Julia Roberts, Blake Lively, Bella Hadid’s street looks, Elsa Hosk and Leandra of course

  • Olivia R

    I’ve been waiting for Jenna to announce her next move since she left J Crew, but I guess for now I’ll have to settle for virtually rooting through her closet castoffs. At least we wear the same size shoe!

    • T-Fierce

      Haha came here to say that about the shoes! Not a 2 but definitely a 9.5 🙂

  • Miss Piggy was the first glamorous “person” I was ever aware of as a small child in northeastern Montana. She was what sparked my love of fashion and my parents were baffled as I’d steal tank tops from my dad and cut them up to make “gowns”. Oh man, memories.

    Anyways: SJP, Carolyn Bessette Kennedy, 70’s Cher, Aerin Lauder’s Aspen home closet, and Beth Jones from B. Jones Style.

    • silla

      Yes! Carolyn Bessette Kennedy. Forgot about her

    • SSDGM

      70’s CHER OMG YES!

  • AbsintheWithoutLeave

    VERY disappointed that she’d wear a real fur coat. So gross. And cruel.

  • Anna Impson

    Tracee Ellis Ross, Iris Apfel, Erika Jayne, Leandra, Solange Knowles

    Thank was fun!

    Also, side note to you that love this fancy J. Crew. Look into their warehouse sales. I know there are some in the South but there are some in New York and SF too. You can find some dope ish at those sales.

  • silla

    Leandra Medine. Jenna Lyons, Arnie Hammer’s character in Call Me By Your Name, Queen Elizabeth and Margot Robbie

  • Amanda Laing

    1. Edie Sedgwick 2. Christene Barberich 3. Mary Kate Olsen 4. Sienna Miller 5. Florence Welch. Swoon.

    • dadagal

      Thanks for the intro to Christene.

    • Kiks

      You totally stole my list bro!

  • Stiletto

    closet raid wishlist: Daphne Guinness, Aureta, Anna Dello Russo, Olivia Palermo, Holly Golightly

  • Ally Frankel

    Olivia Palermo, Carrie Bradshaw, Arielle Charnas, Kendall Jenner, Elaine Welteroth!!

  • Laura

    Selling clothing items from her closet, eh. Also, taking her time to announce her next move. Me thinks this caterpillar is going to blossom into a very unreconizable and changed butterfly. Good for her…

  • Tunrie

    Chimamanda Adichie Ngozi, Chloe + Halle, Tracie Ellis Ross, Falana and Haley Nahman!!! Whoot whoot!

  • Laura S

    Everything from The Talented Mr. Ripley, everything Grace Kelly wore in Rear Window, 70s DVF, The Olsen Twins, and Carrie Bradshaw for some flair.

  • Never in my life have I wanted to be a size 9.5 instead of a 10. NEVER. Also, if I weren’t doing a year of no shopping, I would be all over that Lanvin silk drape top and those Balenciaga flares.

    As for closets: Elaine Welteroth, Kate Moss, Amal Clooney, Victoria Beckham, and Jaime King.(And I’m assuming Jenna Lyons is a bonus gift as #6 for everyone, okay.)

    P.S. This question took me a half hour to answer, WAY TO GO, TEAM.

  • Court E. Thompson

    Omg that Michael Kors wool skirt!!! Dying.

    The only thing saving my credit card right now is that her feet are bigger than mine.

  • beckly

    Amelia Earhart, Peggy Guggenheim, Françoise Gilot, Nancy Cunard, Annemarie Schwarzenbach.

  • Saskia

    Assuming everything would fit me: Tilda Swinton, Kate Lanphear, Claire Underwood, Caroline de Maigret and Victoria Beckham

  • Elizabeth Beanland

    Off the top of my head … Chloe Sevigny, Jane Birkin, Cher, Ditte Reffstrup (creative director of Ganni), Phoebe Philo

  • Katia

    Same, Harling, same. The dinner-party question always seems geared to philosophers or people of bonne mots, and so while they might be brilliant and have amazing ideas to share, I’d rather crack a beer with Anthony Bourdain than say, Einstein.

    But on to the important stuff aka those closets: Anita Pallenberg (peak Stones inspiration = feathers, fur, and brocade for days); Jenna Lyons (for artful mashups), Johnny Depp (because his accessories game is on point), 70s Anjelica Huston (talk about power dressing FTW), and Chloe Sevigny (plus, I’d also steal her legs…mine are long but hers are incredible).