My Instagram’s Perfect, My Real Life Is Not
Collage by Maria Jia Ling Pitt

Over the past several months, I’ve been rejected by 11 of the 12 medical schools to which I applied. The rejections came by email: first Cornell — right away, which made me cry — then NYU, then Columbia. They trickled in, forcing a running joke between me and my boyfriend: “Who’s up next?” I became numb to it. I had to. It hurt too much.

As the once-unthinkable scenario of not being admitted to a single medical school became my reality, my boyfriend — who is adopted — received a different kind of life-altering news: his biological sister, who he hadn’t seen since she was an infant, was being flown to New York as a finalist in a major modeling competition, and their mother was looking for them all to reunite.

Having spent sixteen years wondering and worrying about the paths their lives had taken, the reunion was a profound source of joy and relief for my partner. His sister won the competition and the year-long contract that came with. She moved to New York, and into the Flatbush apartment my boyfriend and I shared, shortly after.

In the months of cohabitation that followed, I failed to adapt to the new living arrangement, wavering between resentment and pained acceptance, wanting to support my partner as he grew his relationship with his sister while also mourning the brief four months of bliss that was our living together, just the two of us.

As home became a space in which I felt increasing pressure to be “on” at all times, I suffered a months-long depression. I’d been preparing for years to gain entry to medical school. I’d worked in hospitals since I was a teenager. I’d spent my undergraduate years toiling away at a challenging and competitive pre-med curriculum. I’d spent thousands of dollars and countless hours preparing for the MCAT. I’d filleted myself before a dozen faceless admissions committees, disclosing intimate parts of my history to strangers. And I had nothing to show for it. Just rejection. Just failure.

During this time, my boyfriend and I turned into people neither of us liked or wanted to be. I made the incredibly painful decision to move out of the home we created together — the first I’d ever shared with a significant other — and found a studio a few blocks away, hoping it would ease the tension and pressure I felt in our apartment. I knew it would be hard, but I thought it would make us happier. It didn’t. It felt like a loss. It felt like a step backwards. We separated shortly after.

You wouldn’t know any of this if you were to look at my social media presence.

A true millennial, I spend every day — cumulatively several hours a day — on social media. I follow a carefully curated list of 283 Instagram accounts that I review and revise regularly. I have a (freakish?) compulsion to keep that list short so that I don’t miss any content. I post frequently and publicly: pictures of myself, of Brooklyn (the borough), of Brooklyn (my puppy), of my (now ex-)boyfriend. I am a similarly active Facebook user: my 708 friends are my (real) friends, family members, mentors and co-workers. With most of my family on the West Coast, it’s fast become an easy way to keep tabs on one another. I post life updates, photos from trips and political content with gusto. All of which is to say: I’m not usually averse to sharing.

This isn’t a part of myself that I’m entirely proud of or comfortable with. There is an old soul in me that recoils at how many of my human connections are virtual, at how much of myself and my life I present for the consumption of acquaintances and strangers. I also feel guilty and conflicted about participating in the larger, vainglorious project that is a defining feature of social media: of only sharing when the news is good.

Just weeks ago, an old friend texted wanting to catch up because, “[she] always sees these amazingly happy photos of [me] on Facebook,” and wanted to hear about my happiness in person. I almost had to laugh. I’d never been more unhappy.

My rejection from medical school is an injury I’ve yet to recover from, a wound I’ve yet to reveal (though this writing marks something of a start). I made most of my college friends in my pre-med courses at Yale. My Facebook feed is perpetually filled with photos of their white coat ceremonies. My best friend, who is my age, will soon be starting her residency. And I’m still out here, untethered, waiting for a significant part of my life to begin. Academia has long been the space in which I’ve staked my self-worth. My intelligence — as measured by grades, scores, assessments and acceptances — is a part of me that I’m deeply proud of.

My relationship with my partner has likewise been one my proudest accomplishments. This was a person who made me feel good and loved and seen, who made me want things I’d never before allowed myself to believe I could have — monogamy, cohabitation, kids, commitment. Relationships aren’t boxes you check, but connections you pour yourself into, living things you have to care for. Our unraveling has felt like one of my greatest failures, one that I haven’t had the courage to broadcast — even as I’ve wanted to unload some of this pain in a public way; even as I’ve needed to update friends and family, if only to put an end to the “you look so happy” messages.

My Instagram and Facebook page are filled with photos of him and us. The part of me that feels like social media is some tidy representation of our identities and our personal narratives wants desperately to exclude this, as though the excluding will make it less real, as though for once the virtual might inform the physical and everything will be okay.

These days, I find myself posting and deleting, posting and deleting. I feel on me the eyes of our friends and family who know. Every post feels heavy and symbolic, a representation of the life I’m living now. An answer to, “Who are you, now that you’re alone?” Maybe it’s right, then, that I share sparingly, or not at all. Because I’m still figuring that out.

Get more Brain Massage ?
  • Oh.
    You are now a person whose story has become a part of my life, most of all because you made me care so much while reading.

    (I curate outgoing information of any kind, too. Always, not just in virtual spheres. Because I usually hope the received response will offer some support and it wouldn’t if it was just as negative as my life can be. But I do venture out with some harsher stories, occasionally, a bit. Just to see what happens.)

    Anyway, kudos for telling it all – I bet there’s even more strength in you to support you in the days to come.

  • Abby

    I always have to remind myself that just because someone’s Insta is all sunshine and rainbows doesn’t mean that their life is like that. Sometimes I think to myself that my life must REALLY be a hot mess because I can’t curate my Instagram to ideal perfection to even fake a perfect life. I hope everything turns out well for you in the end!

  • Cristina

    This was so great. I honestly hate what Instagram is doing to us as humans, and I honestly hate that I can’t quit. If I quit, how will I know where my favorite pizza truck is that night? I mean, I feel like social media makes us lose, and actually despise, any sense of individuality. There’s an awesome new bookstore in my city. I love. But when describing it to a friend I literally said “It’s beautiful and I want everything. I wouldn’t actually use any of those cookbooks, but if you want to post your books on Instagram, that’s the place for you”. The whole shop was designed and curated toward this millennial, minimalist Instagram aesthetic. I hated it and loved it all at once. I know a married couple that post sooooo much lovey dovey stuff, gifts they bought each other etc on Facebook. I also know what their marriage is like behind closed doors and trust me, it ain’t lovey dovey. I can’t imagine exerting the amount of effort to keep up appearances on social media. I’d rather just not post at all and just be a media consumer. So that’s what I try to do. I just scroll to check some updates. I don’t follow any accounts that I compare myself or my life too. Most local places, for sales and specials and such. Thank you for being so open!

    • Sarah

      I almost think that I use social media (mostly IG) to try to force my individuality or try to show people that I AM more of an individual (than them). Like “ooh, if I post that I have this style of pant orrrr sunglasses before anyone else in my social circle does, than IIII am the ‘first to wear’ or ‘most unique'”…. WHICH IS SO STOOPID.

      • Cristina

        It makes me think of Lena Dunham. (not a fan, but not mad at people who are). It’s like she tries SO HARD to be different than everyone else, and that’s her schtick. But it just makes her the same as all the other people trying to be different just like her.

    • the hilarious thing about Instagram is that the algorithm just reinforces your urges. Like a bunch of aspirational stuff? It gives you more. For me my hobby is photographing bugs and I wish I’d created a separate account for it because now my entire feed is bugs. What I’d give for some avocado toast or a nice fashion post.

      • Cristina

        LOL! I know, which I why I don’t search or follow and fitness accounts cause then my WHOLE things is like, Shakeology and paleo lol. Same for Facebook ads. I was resisting some shoes online and when I went to Facebook, THERE THEY WERE. It’s very Big Brothery.

  • tmm16

    Thank you for your transparency and honesty. It’s very hard to admit once someone says, “You look so happy!” that you are in-fact the opposite. Sending good vibes your way!

  • I would take both the break up and the rejections and move with it. Get off of instagram and get your life! You are already there. You can do it. <3<3<3

  • Mellisa Scarlett

    Thank you for being so open. I have a love hate relationship with social media and often find myself swallowed in comparison and or projecting only the “good” or “worthy” to be scene parts of my fairy tail life. I think the pressure our generation is subjected to portray perfect imagines has impacted us in terrible ways at times. I’m still trying to find me and be real, and be present and be internet social. its mess. Recently I posed the question to a friend ” What would you enjoy doing if you couldn’t be seen doing it?” We both were silent for way too long. Do you even authentically enjoy traveling or do you do it to post cool ” I’m living really well” post?Were all in this together. Your exactly were your meant to be and your path is yours. Sending you light and love on your journey. -X

    • Sarah

      Wow. “What would you enjoy doing if you couldn’t be seen doing it?” THAT IS GREAT. That question is enough to make me want to give up social media right on the spot.

      • Cristina

        I LOVE MR articles that spark such conversation. I feel the same way. What is really holding me back?!

        • Sarah

          That is crazy to think about, and I almost can’t comprehend it at this point. What holds me back is the thought of not knowing things about people who are in an industry that I may want to get into when I am out of college. Like this is my way in, to KNOW about people… social media allows you so far into people’s lives. Like how else, I would read articles or interviews on individuals? And you know that the social media world & all of the other people still using it is going to keep going on without you, and that makes me feel so out of the loop… like even for a future JOB? I don’t know.

          • Cristina

            That is tough. When I graduated college we barely had Facebook, so it wasn’t even a thought. I knew people through… well, people. Which sounds jerky, but really I guess that’s how I did it lol. But a friend of mine recently rescued some kitties and I had to Google “how to care for 4 week old kittens” and I was just like, WTF did we do before Google? We kind of all sat there. Then someone said “You just asked around until someone knew.” I just can’t even. Cannot. Even.

          • Mellisa Scarlett

            I agree with this entire conversation! lol When I do take my brief and I mean very brief social media breaks I feel SUPER out of the loop. But not only with people/celebrities lives but opportunities. Like how will anyone notice ME! lol especially when your trying to break in to PR/ marketing fields. Its such a tug of war.

          • Cristina

            For once, I am thankful to be in my thirties then cause I DO work in Marketing and I didn’t get here by social media haha! Actually, this job I’ve been at for 3 years with a major franchise, I even got because I knew someone at my then job who knew someone that used to work for my boss! GREAT now I’m just wondering even MORE why I’m on social media!!! Lol!!

      • Cristina

        AND just think of how less stressful it would be not worrying about lighting or if your photo is good or pretty enough?! Mind blown.

        • Sarah


    • Cristina

      When Facebook was first created (hi I’m old) I swear, I went through a phase where the thoughts in my head were basically one-liners for statuses. I would be like “Oh man, that’s perfect for Facebook”. I have a serious fear from disconnecting to all of it. “Pic or it didn’t happen” is such a widely used phrase, it’s so sad. I read that flip phone sales have started to increase though, as more people digitally detox.

    • ^New favorite ice-breaker question! Brb, going to ask EVERYONE

  • Adrianna

    I’ve suffered through severe depression and trauma, and I sometimes still grapple with PTSD. For the past five years, my three family members have taken turns reporting each other to the police and filing claims and lawsuits. My friends’ weddings are a reminder that I don’t have any relatives because I am an immigrant. I haven’t gone on vacation or an airplane until two years ago.

    I’m a very active user on Instagram. I’ve posted 1915 photos since 2012. I just don’t overthink it. I am a photographer and I draw, so it is a creative outlet. I frequently scroll through my own feed and reflect on the good times I have had, such as eating a bowl of ramen or hiking for the first time two years ago.

  • Sarah

    Wow. This is a hard subject to look at, but a very important one. Thank you for sharing this and allowing us to be apart of your life. Good luck to you in your pursuit.

  • I just graduated from med school and wanted to write you a quick note to echo the other people who have probably told you that many people don’t get into med school the first time. I have several friends who reapplied, got in, and did amazingly well (honor society, matched at their first choices, all that fancy stuff). I personally had a TERRIBLE MCAT score and was worried that it meant I would have bad board scores. It didn’t, mostly because I changed the way I studied and took the extra time I needed. There are so many hurdles and setbacks in this process for so many of us, it’s very normal to have to try again at something. When one of my friends was going through the application process, one of her mentors told her “doctors are not superheroes, they are just people who work really hard”. You can absolutely be a doctor if that is what you choose to do. You are already a beautiful writer, which is a skill that will stand out as a medical student. Take some time, reevaluate your application, ask for help from mentors, fill in any gaps in scores, research, or grades (time off is viewed so favorably these days), and try again. Good luck!

    • Shelby Davis-Cooper

      Thanks for this. No matter how many times I hear it, it always helps.

  • Sarah

    More and more, i feel like Instagram is a pretend game adults are playing with themselves… since starting to look at this way, i’ve started to take everything that everyone posts with a grain of salt and it’s made me less inclined to share my life with people.

    Example: When someone posts a heavily romantic and long anniversary or birthday message to their partner online i actually question it – like WHY WHY ARE YOU SHARING THAT WITH 500+ PEOPLE? WHY IS SAYING IT ONLY TO YOUR PARTNER NO LONGER ENOUGH?

    • SpiritAndCourage

      Every time I see someone post a birthday message to their mom… who doesn’t have social media.

      • Cristina

        OR THEIR BABYYYY. Actually, I guess people are creating social media accounts for their babies. I know two.

        • gracesface

          I used to read this girl’s blog and loved it. Once she had a kid I guess she deleted it and now her instagram is just pictures and videos of her kid which she basically worships. It’s a very public display of affection, near constantly.

    • Adrianna

      I think the bigger question is, why do the anniversary or birthday posts bother you so much? I post photos on our anniversary and/or birthday, and I really do not think about it, or my intent, as much as you seem to do.

    • Jennifer

      Same!! I’m mean sure, post a cute pic of you and your boo with a simple caption, “blah blah love you, happy anni!” But the people who post like their life story, struggles, “I’m a better person bc of you” blah blah blah, I’m just like geez, save that for your partner, write that in a card maybe? It’s like people feel the NEED to post it on Facebook or Instagram, bc if they don’t, it didn’t happen?? I dunno. I think a lot of people are just quite full of themselves honestly.

      • Adrianna

        Haha wow, that is a lot of judgement

      • Cristina

        A lot of people need outside validation to feel good about themselves, or their relationship. Or their life in general. I don’t post anything on social media about my mom on mothers day. But i sure do call her text her send her a card and a gift and let her know IRL how much she means to me.

        • Jennifer

          Exactly! People need outside validation nowadays for EVERYTHING. It’s really quite sad what social media has done to the human psyche in this aspect.

    • Mary Kate Kloeblen

      Funny enough, I was recently talking about this with a friend. One interesting point she made was that she feels like she ends up posting these type of things when she’s feeling insecure in her relationship (i.e. after a big fight or while going through a rough patch in the relationship) not necessarily fully recognizing what she’s doing at the time. Again, that is just her own perspective on the matter, but I feel like many others could say this is true for themselves as well. While I think different people are comfortable posting varying levels of personal information/feelings, I also have the same inclination to want to take everything with a grain of salt and share much less on social media than I used to. I somewhat feel like you start to miss out on the candid moments in life and enjoying them when you’re constantly thinking of how you can portray what you’re doing/how you’re feeling on social media.

    • Cristina

      The ones that drive me crazy are “my mom is better than yours” or “I have the best husband in the world” like… no. I know someone who has an actual hashtag #myfriendsarebetterthanyours that she tags on all her friend pics. Just. No.

    • Jeanie

      I have yet to make a post like this even though my husband and I have been together for over eight years. Sometimes I think about writing something like that to tell people how great HE is, but I think people can tell how much I like him without me saying it. I’m not out to make people feel less than.

    • dietcokehead

      I refuse to wish anyone a happy birthday on Facebook anymore, and it’s been an amazing year or so. Highly recommend. Pro tip: Hide your own birthday on there so you won’t feel bad about reciprocity.

  • Leandra Medine

    I love this piece SO MUCH Shelby because I always used to say that Instagram makes me feel like a sociopath, (see: ) –> this was particularly true when my “fertility journey” was starting. i felt like i was leaving behind a controlled life as a happily married person with a good career (which was reflected in all of my posting) to become essentially, an unchained human science project. it took a second for my social media persona to catch up with how i was feeling in my real life (which was like it was ending before it had started) but it was important that it did catch up, ultimately (mostly bc i am someone who wears her guts on her sleeve). re: the rejection, life changes, etc — i am a firm believer that all change is good change. truly. if we get out of it alive, we are better stronger more thoughtful compassionate empathetic etc etc people for it but when you’re in it, it can sometimes feel like you’re inside a birth canal — super anxious about the fact that you are being forced to leave a place you know that is comfortable (the womb!) to enter really unfamiliar territory (the world!) but what i am learning now (every fucking day — no segues, breaks, relief, anything) is that there’s no such option as re-entering the womb. no matter how badly you want to. the harder you try to resist (emotionally speaking), the more time you’re forced to spend in the birth canal. unsolicited advice and arguably not even advice that you need, so i should actually say thank you for making me write that out, gtg charge into the world

    • Shelby Davis-Cooper

      I can’t thank you enough, Leandra, for creating a space and community where I feel comfortable+safe sharing this

    • Sarah Klaassen

      This is such a great way of explaining how hard yet necessary change is, thank you!!

  • Cecily

    I so relate to feeling wounded from rejection of something you’ve worked non-stop to achieve. My application process after college (to dietetic internships, not medical school, I wish!), was a rollercoaster of rejection that left me feeling exhausted, ashamed, and ready to give up. Ironically, I ended up in Mississippi for two years (which I thought was the end of the world at the time), which ended up being one of the best (and hardest!) things that has ever happened to me. Seeing my old classmates doing what I wanted to be doing on social media forced me to focus on the good and unique experiences that were happening in my life. That two years was what I needed to refocus, evaluate what I really wanted from life and a career, and work up the courage and energy to reapply. The internship that I was accepted to the second time around (yay!!) is a perfect fit for me, and I think I would have missed that if I had gotten into one of the programs I originally wanted to go to. All this to say, I hope this is a tiny bit of encouragement that good things sometimes take time and now I have so much respect for people who have the courage to try for something more than once, because that takes courage!

  • Jill

    Let me say this – YOU are ENOUGH. When I was younger, I didn’t know it either. It takes time and soul searching and a fair amount of IDGAF to get to really believing it. But you are…these setbacks are a necessary part of growth – as unpleasant as they may be, and your pain comes across in every word you’ve written. My heart aches for you. But you will get there. With or without social media, med school, and the need to present a “happy front” to family and friends. I grew up without social media, and the world was painful then. It’s magnified for so many now, with all the access and the extra (shaming, bullying, the online vitriol etc) that comes with it. But do what is best for YOU, because in the end that’s what matters. Others will be happy for you if you’re happy…and if they’re not, they’re not worth holding a place for in your life. The digital world and social media can be useful or destructive tools…you are in charge of which. But you have nothing to prove, to anyone. Not even yourself. Your are enough….just by being here. And you’ll get to where you want to go…or you’ll find that another path is actually a better path. We are all just working our way through. No matter what anyone’s IG feed might look like. Wishing you all the best. *hugs*

  • Jolie

    Thank you so much for writing this beautiful piece!

    I’m currently going through something similar. I’m at the unhappiest point of my life, and it’s lasted about a year and a half now. I feel overwhelmed, depressed, anxious, and not like myself. My relationship, which means the world to me, has suffered from it, and I often feel like I’m spiraling.

    You would never know this from my Instagram or Facebook or whatever. There are times when I put my vulnerability out there and discuss my sadness, but it’s never taken seriously because everything (even sadness) is just a stupid meme now. Me posting “I’m so depressed” on an Insta photo means nothing. It feels like we aren’t allowed to be vulnerable in public. So I post adorable couple pics and stuff like that and everyone tells me how happy I am when they see me. As if they know because they saw it online.

    Despite this, I do have a love of social media that coexists with my overstimulation. But I definitely will admit that it’s seeped deeply into my life and the lives of everyone I meet. Oftentimes I’ll go to a restaurant not because the food sounds good, but because they have “Instagrammable” dishes or decor or whatever. It makes me feel like a crazy person.

  • lily

    of course we always post the good/happy stuff on Instagram. Really if I post something sad/negative few people would respond. But try posting some joyful news its like zillion comments and remark are posted under your picture. Some people dont know what to say, and in many they simply dont care.
    on the contrary, I hear you. I had a lousy crappy year that is fulled with rejection and I know how you feel sister, it hurts like a b*tch. Also my Instagram holds only happy moments and contradicts the reality but the way I see it its like an escape from reality. You can post happy cute pics and be hopeful that one day it would turn into reality. One day you will have your shit together and and your reality is the same as your Instagram feed. Basically all we have is hope at this point.
    But on a lighter note, the recovery from rejection is not an easy road and fu*k who says if your rejected you cant try again and again?? take the time and rethink your choices. If its something meant to be, honey it will!
    cry your sh!t out and the next day hold your head up high and start thinking of the future. If its medical school your really and true want than never give up
    I have faith in you, YOU CAN DO IT!!!

  • notinlondon

    I deleted Facebook, which has made me really happy. I deactivated my Instagram, only to return a month and a half later. The break from Instagram really helped though. It feels like too much pressure sometimes.

  • Meg S

    Instagram is your best version of yourself that you want to show people you don’t really know. That’s why private instagram and snapchat exists, you can send it only to your friends who you actually know. Anyone who really knows me will know that what’s on instagram isn’t real. I mean, it is, but while you see my water in a double walled glass tumbler with a green smoothie next to it, I’m hiding the bottle of coke I just picked up and you don’t know that I went to chick fil a for breakfast. Or that the marble backdrop I sometimes use is really just contact paper. The unpainted pine table is real, but it came from Ikea for $99.

  • Sarah Bauer

    Our awareness of our own mortality motivates everything, absolutely everything we do, every decision we make, including what we post on social media. There is a desire to present a self and have control over how it is received – have control of how we are now and how we will be remembered and how we want to remember ourselves. This illusion of control (we have none, ahh!!) keeps us going back to these spaces where our grasp on managing everything about ourselves feels strongest.

    When everything else around us feels unhinged, social media can make us feel like we’re back in the driver’s seat.

    It’s a very convincing illusion.

  • kay

    this article and the comments…i love MR so much.

  • gracesface

    Here I am in 2017, STILL Facebook creeping on people I went to college with, I actually went to my college’s page, tracked down the album of photos from my graduation day (6 years ago!) and then felt sad that I wasn’t in one of the pictures, and I’m still looking at people I knew from that place I lived in briefly years ago and thinking whyyyy am I not there now. And I agree that Instagram has left things SO curated. I hardly post on it myself but I follow a lot of people.

    Thanks for posting this guys and sharing these thoughts. The curated life is hard to avoid.

  • Nika

    Shelby – thank you so much for showing bravery and sharing this deeply personal part of your life for the past few months. I’m also currently going through the med school application process in Australia and already kinda think it won’t turn out in my favour come November when offers come out. Nevertheless, the road to a career as a physician is long and taxing and personally I think having a few rejections and a bit of life experience before you start will ultimately make you a better doctor – at least that’s what I tell myself. Anyway thanks again and I truly hope you get into your dream school in the next round. Sending much love and light your way. xoxo

  • Lil

    I don’t really care for what other people post. I’ll simply unfollow whoever gets annoying.

    Personally I never post photos of a significant other. Maybe one, if it’s serious. It’s just because if the relationship ends, I’m burdened with looking back at memories that’ll make moving on even more difficult. Plus I hate having to go back and delete said photos, or worse: feel guilty for deleting them…

  • Mun

    I think this is (sadly) what i lot of people could relate to. Sure some instagrammers may step out and proclaim that their lives are indeed that fabulous but ultimately we need to ask ourselves what kind of values or focus that we want in our lives. If we are constantly turning to strangers for affirmation, something is not quite right there…

  • Katherine Prochnow

    Instagram, right now, is such a huge installation in my life. It’s like a third arm. I literally have 50 drafts of pictures I want to post in the future. And once I post a picture I’m obsessed with watching all the likes come in. If it doesn’t reach at least 100 I take it down right away. I feel as if it gives me a sense of false self-confidence. As if all the people liking my pictures and commenting how much they like my outfit or how funny I am give me a bounce in my step and a smile on my face. The sad thing is when I don’t get this type of positive attention on my posts I feel ugly and unloved. It’s pretty crazy. Sometimes I even feel like not posting anything at all for a couple weeks to see if people would think I actually died. They honestly probably would. They might even send out a search party for my body. Anyway in all seriousness I think we should all take a step back, you know. And treat Instagram as you would a boyfriend or girlfriend. You wouldn’t date someone so they could just give you compliments all the time. Well I might but that relationship wouldn’t last. You would want someone you want to spend time with, someone who will help you grow, someone you can laugh with and rant to, someone who will see your ugly side every now and then. Using a relationship or an Instagram account, solely to boost your self confidence is kinda unhealthy. Get confidence in yourself and then get an Instagram account and a super hot guy/gal.

    I know my whole little rant there didn’t really have anything to do with the whole “letting the world only see your good side online” but I guess it just goes hand in hand. Just be your own self loving, gorgeous, handsome self online and off. Oh you have my best wishes on getting into medical school:)


    Despite this being an old post from last year, I thought I’d post something ( Ps. It’s these totally REAL stories on MR that keeps me coming back and toting it above all other websites on the web – stay real MR ) I completely and utterly felt moved by this story because I went through basically the same thing except I didn’t have a really awesome instagram ( not very good at it tbh )

    No matter what I did in ’14, ALL of my applications for jobs would just go unanswered. It wasn’t just rejection it was blatant ‘success’ blocking from the universe. I sank into the darkest depression ever in my life and literally wanted to end it all because work was impossible to find plus all around me people were succeeding and very early and young at that too. Imagine how that must feel to see people around you casually send off applications and just ‘get’ the jobs you want without much effort at all.

    Yes, my field was limited. I studied writing at university but I knew lots of writers who managed to get nice jobs that I could’ve done easily too such as editorial assistants at publishing houses, magazines and newspapers. The universe was literally blocking all my attempts at being noticed and moving forward. I hated my life. I ran away to Japan to escape it all, that’s how much I hated my life there.

    When I read this article, I felt so connected to the writer. Hey Shelby! HANG IN THERE! Trust me it’s gonna get better. I know that’s the most annoying thing to hear especially when you’re in the midst of shit ( maybe things have changed, this article was published last year ) but trust me, the light is coming. I know because my life has changed and I’m no longer sad or depressed and opportunities have been opening up left, right and center. If this can happen to me, it can definitely happen to you.

    Sending love and light your way from Melbourne to NYC!