How to Read Your Own Palm

A super cool trick that will either make your night or ruin everything.

10.31.16

This story is from October 2016, but what better time to bring back than the holidays? Make this your new party trick and try it out on your family!

The art of palmistry dates back several thousand years. A million interpretations of it exist, but — just for you — I did some research (Google) and some curating, then sprinkled in modern, much-needed context. Because I love you, your palms and your chirological foretellings. (That means palm reading. I told you I researched!) In the event that you’re kind of bored, are feeling a little dazzled by the dark arts or are just in the mood to feel something, read on and give this a whirl.

how-to-read-your-own-palm-man-repeller-guide

1. SUN LINE

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A long vertical sun line indicates a super-lucky life (you never place a bad bagel order, you have lots of good hair days, you only had braces once). A blurred line suggests lack of focus (you have 78 tabs open at all times, you’ve half-watched several shows on Netflix, you have 12 different dream jobs). A hard worker’s line curves toward the thumb (you got all A’s, you don’t take too many Ubers, you go to bed before 11 p.m.).

2. HEALTH LINE

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A health line that crosses the life line suggests ill health and inherited illnesses (your whole family is lactose intolerant, you ate Twizzlers for breakfast, you lie about how much your drink to your doctor). A wavy line indicates digestive problems (you get diarrhea three times a week, you don’t eat gluten, you’ve pooped in 72 different Starbucks). A blurred line shows a lack of stamina (you love an elevator, you start saying you’re tired ~2 p.m., you don’t like being on top).

3. FATE LINE

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The absence of a fate line indicates an uneventful life (you remember finding $5 in 1994, you eat the same thing for breakfast every day, you’ve never pulled an all-nighter); a double line foretells two careers (you have a lot of slashes in your Instagram bio, you sold weed for a minute in high school). If your fate line ends on the head line, that reveals a tendency towards errors in judgment (you’ve shaved off both your eyebrows, you went through a bedazzling phase).

4. LIFE LINE

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A long life line indicates excellent health (you eat raw vegetables and don’t ask for a medal, you tell people you just like to exercise, you always get a flu shot). Someone with a double line may be a twin, or even lead a double life (you’ve secretly seen every season of The Bachelor). Breaks or splits suggest a change of direction in life (you recently went blonde, you’ve been vegan for two months and talk a lot about it, you just moved to New York).

5. HEAD LINE

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A head line touching both sides of the palm indicates a self-centered, focused individual (you write in a journal every night, you spend a lot of time thinking about that one weird tooth, you can read while the TV is on). A forked line suggests a talent for communication and public speaking (you give good wedding toasts, your mouth doesn’t become the Sahara Desert during presentations, you tell your partner what you want).

6. HEART LINE

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A curved heart line, some distance from the fingers, reveals a generous, sensual and loving nature (you pet your friends a lot, you never leave a Venmo request hanging, you give good birthday presents). A broken line indicates a tendency to be unfaithful (SparkNotes was your homepage in high school, you have a fear of sending the wrong text to the wrong person, you totally talk shit).

7. MARRIAGE LINE

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A straight long marriage line indicates deep and lasting love (you think your partner is better than everyone else, the two of you discuss your poop, you aren’t threatened by his or her success). If your marriage line is short, it indicates passionlessness (sex bores you to tears, so does chocolate, you low-key hate romance). If it’s also shallow, you usually lack the patience to pursue love (dating apps make you sick, so does dating, you hate talking to strangers).

8. MONEY LINE

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If the lines are many, deep, clear and straight, this shows you are smart, good at investing and could make a fortune (your IQ is lit, you’ve worn the same winter coat for years, people keep asking if you’re hiring interns). Waved money lines show your fortune is not stable (you’re a freelancer, you sometimes go through hedonistic shopping phases, your credit score is confused). Intermittent money lines often indicate bad wealth fortune (you’re sick of instant ramen, your identity is constantly stolen, you reversed your 401k to buy 53 pairs of wedge sneakers in 2012).

Info gathered from yourchineseastrology.com.

Guide designed by Emily Zirimis.

Get more Mixed Bag ?
  • Spencer Glassman

    I think my hands are missing many of these lines!

    • Chloe

      Same! Apparently i’m going to have a very long uneventful, unlucky life with no partner and no money 🙁

    • Mine too! I only have like 3 of the lines.

    • Abby

      I could only find one of these on myself.

    • I have no health and no money, and apparently my marriage will not last. Damn.

      • Kristy Koutsogiannis

        Don’t worry, I’m also missing the exact same lines!

    • Ciccollina

      Yeah! Haley, what does it mean if you are missing a line altogether?

  • Keta Vashakmadze

    I guess i will live long being poor, unlucky, unmarried and stupid <3

  • I have no money line! Should I be living in a box? I also think I have two marriage lines, which is a bit worrying…

    At least now I know what my severely forked head line means. I’m a journalist, so communication is my bitch!

    • Jamie Leland

      I always thought the “marriage” lines here indicated the number of children you would have.

      • I would much prefer that way of interpreting it.

        • Jamie Leland

          Me too. This whole guide makes my palm look pretty bleak.

  • Mary

    V concerned that I am missing many of these lines, namely, money, marriage, fate, health? Bleak

  • Katie

    So which hand do you read? Cause mine are not alike.

    • Jamie Leland

      I believe it’s the right. In my middle school palm reading days, I was taught that the left hand represents your past life and the right, your present.

    • Laura

      On Lauren Conrad’s site, they wrote the left represents what could be and the right hints at what will be. Also something about the left showing the emotional lines. Idk.

      https://laurenconrad.com/blog/2016/10/hocus-pocus-the-easy-guide-to-palm-reading-101/

  • Madeline

    Call Donald Trump—my blurred health line means I have a “lack of stamina.”

  • Molly D

    No marriage line but a cavernously sensual heart line. What a slut.

  • I’m missing all the best ones haha x

    http://www.wonkylauren.com

  • I’m missing like half these lines… I call bs, I’m gonna rich one day 😉

  • my hands are so chubby

  • Summer

    No money line. Should have known…

  • Amelia Diamond

    MY HANDS ARE SMALL LIKE YOURS BUT THEY’RE NOT YOURS THEY ARE MY OWN – Jewel

  • sam

    Which hand!!?

    • Brigitte

      exactly. which hand? my left is completely different from the right.

  • PCE

    Marriageless and penniless but a long healthy lonely poor life

  • My hands are literally the most wrinkly hands of all time. People legit tell me I have grandma hands. So…who knows what having a bajillion lines means. Maybe my hand is trying to tell me I’m a hot mess (which is true most days).

    Natalie Was Here

  • Alice

    Since when is a bedazzling phase an error in judgment?

  • MG

    True story. The opening scene of factory girl gave me an irrational fear of having my palm read until just now. Thank you, MR for helping me face my 10 year long fear. In other news, I have no money or marriage lines. :'(

  • Shh!

    C’mon Guys! REALLY! Look at the hand shown. Is it a Right hand or a left hand? Ha! REALLY??

  • rolaroid

    I don’t have a money line. Explains a lot.