What a World We Live In: Bill the Stickman

Who the hell is Bill? I had exactly zero intention to involve myself in the meme that is currently making the Internet its exhaustive merry-go-’round, but the digital-deity-damned stick figure wouldn’t let me off the wireless cord without first leaving his imprint on my turf: The Outnet’s home page right-rail.

On it, I was told that if I want to be like The Outnet’s emaciated figure (smart and chic!), I really ought to shop.

So I’m going to give it to the hollow man.

After all, he no doubt exited January with the highest-ranking SEO score online. He sings to the tune of 1.5 million Facebook fans and is literally just a collection of assembled lines and a circle. The last time we canonized such a primitive figure, he was set up for failure out of the gates as the infamous Hang Man, for heaven’s sake. And according to some news sites I have never heard of, he’s also stealing private information from the very fans responsible for his fame.

What a bandit.

An interlude for context: In the event you’re familiar but unfamiliar with the meme, Bill is that janky-looking stick figure you’ve seen sprinkled throughout your news feeds. He is a better version of you — of all of us — because he does not give into negative Internet tendencies. Selfies? Not his game. Infinite Facebook scrolling? Lol, yeah right.

Basically, it seems, he hates millennials.


Why all the attention? Why are we giving it to him? Is this really what it’s come to? A stick figure posing next to a brief laundry list of habits that look a lot like our reflections?

Maybe that’s the thing. We seemingly pledge allegiance to Bill the asshole because he’s a cyber bully. He consistently reminds us that in order to be smart, or humble, or cool, we have to stop doing X and Y and Z (ergo, all the things we do).

It sounds a lot like we’re using him to either air out our passive aggressiveness — I’m not gonna say that I hate all your selfies, but Bill will, and I’ll endorse that! — or, to further perpetuate our own confrontations with self-deprecation, we’re using him to call ourselves out before anyone else can. It can’t be good for the emotional nuances (all positive) that endorse honest and direct communication. If we’re continually trained to veil how we feel with low common denominator memes and jokes, we run the risk of losing ourselves, which is something I touched upon the last time we pondered this fascinating world we live in.

The other thing, I suppose, that is being overlooked, is hypersensitivity, right? Maybe Bill is just Bill. So I’ll leave you with this, eh?

Leandra overthinks everything

She once spent 500 words talking shit about Bill

And missed dinner to finish her point

Don’t be like Leandra.

Collage by Emily Zirimis; featuring Gucci slippers and leather high-top sneakers.


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  • Yvonne

    Bill = super annoying

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  • Every now and then the world goes crazy about something super-annoying, like this jerk-on-a-stick Bill. Remember Gangnam Style? Unfortunately, so do I.

  • thank you for not knowing why you should care about Bill either? Obviously I care now because I read it on MR but still. Wait, is caring cool? Or not caring? Shit.

  • Maybe Bill is annoying but he also shows us all the weird habbits we have and how crazy is the world we live in (I mean: selfie sticks? Really?)


  • Hahahaha the end. Dying. *clap hand emojis*