Not to spoil the fun, but have you heard about cravats?
In my ongoing attempt to manipulate you to do as I do, there consistently remains the possibility that my conviction is not strong enough to inform yours. On the topic of silk scarves, I’ve spent a definitive two years coercing you to find interest in them — first around your neck, then around your biceps, then as bracelets for your wrists and now as what I want to call “elevated casts.”
If normcore can become a thing; if athleisure can conclusively replace the words “exercise clothes” in conjunction with sportswear, why can’t we also come up with a punny take on the universally acknowledged and often used Ace Bandage. We might also consider Acc. Bandage as a title on the account of its newfangled functionality as an accessory before utilitarian wound-healer. (Unfortunately, neither proposed term perpetuates our standing as the portmanteau generation so if you have a suggestion, there is an idea depository below.) And now, the pithy virtues of taking a silk scarf and wrapping it around either your ankle or wrist (fastening the two loose ends around your thumb), extolled.
1. Depending on the provenance from which you source your scarves, they are a cheaper and no doubt more comfortable alternative to the traditional metal cuff bracelet that is wont to punctuate an overall lewk.
2. This can manifest in a number of ways, one of which adds an element of originality to an otherwise blasé short skirt or dress and pumps. The other might suitably compliment a set of rings.
3. While sure, these elevated casts serve not as 1) a step in the broken-bone recovery process 2) an indication of your affiliation with any official sort of gang, they do moonlight as prime conversation starters.
Lulaburp: Shiranda! I didn’t know you broke your wrist!
Shiranda: Oh, Lulaburp, I didn’t, I’m just wearing a silk scarf around it as an Acc. Bandage.
Lulaburp: You’re weird.
Shiranda: Your name is Lulaburp…
4. In fashion, futility always trumps necessity.