I was going to preface this with a text-heavy interpretation of what a mixed bag of nuts means to me a la college-acceptance essay 2007 but instead really accurate photo evidence will do. As they say, a picture is worth a thousand words, bla bla yadi bloo bloo. Today on TMR, I wear two prints that feel like fifteen prints and cover it in what can be best described as the jacket: an inhuman cheerleader. This is actually a little dance move, part shake-what-your-mama-gave-ya, part Cleopatra-in-da-house (note the gesticulations,) that also falls under the umbrella where ambiguous nuts live. As for the shoes, just plain old weird, I’d say.
My relationship with these satin freaks started as fascination. Are they shoes? Flamboyant orthopedic ones? Are they fancy anchors? Do they open up into a poorly decorated apartment, or at the very least big bunch of throw pillows? The questions subsided though and the fascination grew to adoration, most notably because of this girland then they fell into my lap and when that happened all I could think was shoes-bad-bridesmaid-dress-threw-up-on-placed-on-top-of-cinder-block-covered-in-bridesmaid-throw-up-too. And really now, who wants a shoe that doesn’t accomplish all that in just one simple stride. Glory days.
Finally, here’s just me standing 26 stories high per usual. I’m not sure if you can tell but I did this really weird thing before these photos were taken where I took a razor and rubbed it up and down against my legs. I repeated that same process several times and then there was no more hair. I felt cold for a bit but I’m fine now. To circle back to the title here, if photo documentation couldn’t accomplish what I hoped it would, a mixed bag of nuts is…us. Eclecticism and shit. Figure an airy blouse the pistachio, printed and metallic shorts the salted almonds, ambigous shoes the cashews, or rather cashoes, and you and me the packaging. We’re so plastic chic. Does your brain ever hurt? In other important news, peep a fun Coachella photo diary harvested by the alien behind this computer screen right here.