Here’s to a Different Kind of Mullet
image via Fast Fancy Dress. You had me at fancy.

If you followed me on twitter, you’d know that I often tweet one liners like, “give me a mullet and I will wear it.” What you wouldn’t know though, is that contrary to what the above photo may suggest, I’m not necessarily talking about a mullet for my head. I am however, growing a goatee out.

The mullet is versatile and evokes many an optical illusion because of its’ dual nature: business in the front, party in the back. And while in the traditional sense of the word, it refers to one very elegant hairdo–I urge each and everyone of you to try it out, send your photos, and tell of your human repelling tales–because I am the Man Repeller, I’ve turned it into something more distinctly sartorial, a good way to preserve your virginity if you will.

Some of the innovative comparisons are more obvious, like the mullet dress.

You see, just like a mullet: short in the front…long in the back. I’d argue that is more of a dyslexic mullet, though. Note the inherent business in the back, party in the front feel to it.

Other comparisons, however are more discreet. 
Here, I share with you a very different kind of mullet. One that has nothing to do with hair. Or your head. Or different lengths of hair on said head. Or dress. It likely can’t actually be identified as a mullet but since this is my blog I can paint it any color I want and today I choose to paint it a confused hue of heather gray. 

Sweater: Alexander Wang, Necklace: TOMTOM, Trousers: Kimberly Taylor, Booties: Opening Ceremony

Feast your eyes on the grandpa sweater of all grandpa sweaters a la Alejandro no Wang. Tell me you love my buttons, smile at my tired eyes and take your attention back to the silent mullet.  
…Grandpa in the front…

…Attacked by a vicious wolverine in the back!
 See that? See that? A different kind of mullet. A silent one. With super slashing powers.

Speaking of slashing, this could, by the way, also make for a great DIY titled Slashin’ in Fashion. I’d suggest you use the edges of a very sharp necklace, one not unlike mine, to add a little zest to the nature of your DIY.

And back to the sweater, here’s a look at the front and back against each other:

 all images via Naomi Shon

I know what you’re thinking and yes, I’ve had those moles checked out.

Just kidding, you were thinking, “but Man Repeller, I can see your whole back, that won’t sink the banana boat,” right? Wrong. That lace American Apparel bra is the innerwear equivalent of floral print tencel drop crotch capris adorned by excessive Mongolian fur, pony-hair and smoked Gouda cheese. 

Get more Humor ?
  • Lol. You are brilliant your posts never fail to make me laugh! x

  • Awesome!

  • I call FOUL on the lacy bra. Your fancy talk can't cover up it's inherent sexiness. Sowwy!

  • I love the sweater but I'm drawn to how far you have your hands stuffed into your pant pockets?!!

  • I heart you X 10. Love, love, love the sweater and would totally rock it with a bra too. XO Valerie

  • Did you actually go out like that today? I say that with no judgement based on looks, but werent you fucking cold? I can just imagine cold city winds going right up your back.

    Do you want to come teach me how to be an 7 mo pregnant man repeller? HA- fuck that- my actual body is a man repeller now.

  • that sweater rocks and i want to wear a mullet to my wedding.


    Le Kiss Kiss-Click Here!!!

  • yesssss i love me some mullet shirts! on the subject of business in the front, party in the back, i feel that "front-tucking" needs to be included in this lesson on man-repelling. front tucking is the best – it allows you to show off your skirt/pants/quilteddenimshortswithfeathers while covering up your booty so that it won't attract any unwanted attention. its amazing.

    love the blog!

  • I love your outfit!! Fantastic 🙂 I love the mullet look as well, woot woot. Quick question: where's your lace bra from? I've been looking for the perfect one.

  • Torn and shredded clothes, like Alexander Wang's Wolverine/Grandpa sweater, never fail to puzzle me. Even if they cost $1000s (I'm looking at you, hole-y Balmain tee shirt) they still look like DIY projects gone wrong. Thank you for bringing some sense back into fashion!

  • I love your blog, hilarious but it makes sense. Very entertaining! follwed you on bloglovin'

  • so funny I'm in love with this post!!

  • I'd rock that mullet sweater. I love contradictory statements happening all at once.

  • Well hoorah you can go backless. If I were to do that it would look like poured out a container of curdled cheese…yum (Admit that just brought some hott thoughts to your head).

  • i love lily's style all the time
    anyways great post

    please visit/follow my blog & twitter if you'd like
    (interview with Kim Mesches, featuring BleuDame and holiday gift guides pt. 1 and 2 uploaded!!)
    twitter @divalicious_m

  • I love the business in the front and party in the back.

  • Haha I always like a good mullet, no matter where or in what form it may be 🙂

    PS. Your blog is seriously making people at work think I'm crazy with all my random, hysterical laughing.


  • I love your mullet comparison to fashion. Let's just say there was a Russian kid with a major mullet going on when I was at the airport in Moscow

  • I don't know how, but I've only discovered you recently, Man Repeller. Jokes aside, your writing style is so, so good. And, of course, your handy tips for man repelling.

    Claire @ young-shields

  • Gah, I love your blog. And I loved that sweater, I almost bought the crop top version of it myself (I'm kicking myself for not). Your necklace is great too.

  • Where have you been all my life (rhetorical question)!

  • Business in the front, party in the back. always. I love that Pucci dress– gorgeous.

  • You are, as ever, hilarious! It's really nice to read a blog that's so hilarious and has a fresh take on fashion.


  • oh hello future wedding dress.

    and the cardigan is mad good.

  • I'm actually a big fan of mullet dresses! I don't know if they repel, but I like how they make people go huh, much like the haircut used to before it was taken over by hipsters, along with the "pornstaches" of '07.

    P.S. Great writeup in the Times, by the way.

  • meh. That sweater is a little *too* Miley Cyrus. I guess that makes it a twice-baked mullet? Mullet squared?

  • Love your post! your are so cool! xx

  • Great pictures, we like 🙂
    London Escorts

  • I didn't even notice those moles until you pointed them out! That's amazing though, I would attempt this with one of my many grandpa sweaters, but I'm pretty sure it wouldn't work out that well…maybe I'll find one at a vintage store and see if I can work some magic on it.