Hello from Cannes

Before I start, many of you inquired about the canadian tuxedo that was described in last Friday’s post. There was no image, but now there is.

I do hope it helps you sleep better tonight.

Upon leaving New York to come and transform the South of France into the new Man Repelling capital of the world, I thought I’d be so French legit at doing it. And then I landed and all of a sudden my striped crop top and utterly offensive boyfriend shorts seemed like a tight mini dress from Bebe. My eyes were blinded by CAPRI denim harem pants (they are worse than you think), drop crotch onesies that resembled maxi dresses and wide ass brim hats, wide enough to knock a mango out at the flinch of a neck. I shit you not.

I felt jealous so I did what anyone would do and bought a bathing suit that resembled a diaper set. I haven’t worn it yet but expect a photo one day. One day soon. I also had a chance to read up on some of my September issues and I cannot wait to wear sweaters and shoes that are hairier than my head. Can I get a heck yea!

I ALSO received an email from my friend Matt early this morning. There was an image attached and this is what it said:

“Remember this? No man repelling here. Low cut top, fitted shorts, your practically a walking wet dream”

I’m not sure I need to spell this out but in any case, I will. Matt is very, very, gay (call him for a good time!) If my hair was say, 5 inches shorter, I could probably pass for a Phillip.

Well, it is 9pm. The sun is setting and so will my labia if I don’t get up and dressed soon. Tout a l’heure!

Contact: ManRepeller@gmail.com, Tweetertwatter: @ManRepeller

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