DIY: From Man Repeller to Man Getter

The title of this blog post may be a little deceiving. After all, cock blockers don’t become cock rockers. It’s unnatural. Like a leopard can’t change her spots, a Man Repeller can’t change her penchant for shielding men. She can try though. And sometimes she will succeed. Sometimes.

Take my friend, for example. She’s a pretty girl…thin physique, brown hair and eyes, killer personality…works in fashion (read: chronic offender.) In an effort to remove herself from her natural habitat–that is to say, quit repellin’, start propellin’–she cut a whopping six inches off her Summer ’08 Alexander Wang boyfriend shorts right before heading out for some summer o’fun 4th of July festivities.

She and I speak of conducting social experiments in which we plan to dress in man attracting duds (read: short, tight, fitted, potentially from Bebe or Guess) and then assess the outcome. Said friend thought 4th of July weekend (read: copious amounts of alcohol intake) would be the perfect time to unleash the social experiment. Paired with a silk charmeuse crop top, a la YAYA, the result left her rounding second base with a hunkier hunk than John Stamos circa Full House.
Good bye Jesse and The Rippers, Hello Alex Wang and some Clippers. 

I on the other hand, was simultaneously wearing this fringe cardigan from Opening Ceremony on the beach in East Hampton.

So uh, while her Brazilian wax was getting a real bang for its’ buck, mine was merely itching.

Note: That was a subtle and ironic STD reference. Ironic because one must actually be sexually active in order to obtain an STD.

*editor note: it was more than 2 bases

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  • melissa

    bwahahahahaha amazing post as usual.

  • I'm not sure how many comments I can leave saying thank you for having this blog and being a hilarious genius. Sweet Jesus, Jessie and the Rippers! Reading this little story reminded me of my sister and I – she loves Guess/Bebe and I have a rack of black post-modern feminist meets French serial killer clothes from the thrift store or Barneys.

  • LOL. i just love how inappropriately amazing this was. stellar.

  • Cackling at Natalie's comment.

    "I have a rack of black post-modern feminist meets French serial killer clothes" – HEY ME TOO.

  • When I think of 'Sex(less) in the City', this is the kind of entry I have in mind.

    Wish I was clever enough to speak of on the male fashion criminals. But that would take a special kind of 'killing baby seals and drowning kittens' kind of special. Men don't care enough or posess the self-awareness to know that they are committing a fashion crime.

  • They used FUPA on Rescue Me last night…thought of you!

  • You just made me laugh out loud. SOOooooooo on point.