Kiss of the Spider Woman

While we’re on a fashematics trip, let’s just do one more equation.

Net-a-porter editors cleverly suggested we wear Roberto Cavalli‘s spider-web suede sandals with a printed dress and gold clutch for an eye-catching cocktail look.

We beg to differ though. They’d be far more eye-catching with

American Apparel‘s Black Unitard
AA markets the black unitard as an “adventurous fashion statement.”
Yes. Adventures in Man Repelling.
And now, back to our initial try at an equation…
Spider-web Sandals + Black Unitard =
Spider (Wo)Man

Show your man you love him, wear a face mask. Snap your wrists. Up, up and away. Swing from roof to roof. Say shit like “with great power comes great responsibility.” Our keen forecasting skills suggest you may be single by this time next week.

For related forms and use of unitard:

See: Woman Repelling

See: Human Repelling

*After my friend read this, she suggested we find “gloves that shoot webs” to complete the look. I reminded her we live on planet earth. She called me an asshat and insisted they exist and that “they shoot silly string.” I reminded her again, that this is planet earth.

* She also confessed that she wants to buy a spidey mask, put on her unitard and run through a party. “No one know will know it’s me,” she said.

Get in touch with us! and follow us on Twitter @ManRepeller

Get more Humor ?
  • WHAT?! Have I died and gone to blog heaven! I LOVE this! I love love love this! hahahahahahahahahahahahaha this is hilarious!

  • Anonymous

    I have those gloves. My ten year old neighbor gave them to me for my birthday because he liked them.

  • Anonymous

    Do you guarantee that I will be single in a week? Are you selling me another version of "How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days"? Because I am very interested in purchasing that.

  • If you have enough leisure time, you may go to the mall or go to the Louis Vuitton franchised store to have a good look at varieties of louis vuitton uk the diverse styles and rich colors of the purses with low cost will surely impress you a lot! in fact, Louis Vuitton is one of the most famous fashion design master.he opened the fist suitcase shop called after his name. Looking for a Louis Vuitton outlet and don't know where they are? The easiest way is to enter here. That simple and you definitely will never be disappointed.

  • Coach Outlet Online is your smart choice when you want to get the discount Coach accessory. You can find the exact Coach Bags and other accessory you want at a low price that's right for you. My dear friends, let the Coach Outlet Online pave your way into the world of high fashion with their ultimate fashion factory. Coach Factory Outlet supplies the newest and most fashionable brand Coach on sale.The more Coach shoulder bags you order, the more discount you will get. customers are not only interested in handbags and purses, but also fond of?shoes and jewelry which is sold at the coach outlet.

  • discount coach handbags, leaders and affordable for the American luxury brand known to create attractive designer coach outlet online store and accessories. During the traditional and popular perfect balance.our coach outlet online offer your high quality coach outlet store online and coach sunglasses. Orders Over $100 Free Shipping. At the Coach Outlet Online Store, quality products and satisfying service are provided;High safety and prompt delivery is guaranteed.

  • Mainly because products are rattling straight forward, locomotion, to see our own elements connected with Coach Factory Outlet you can actually just make an effort to accomplish without this. Coach Factory Online, a place you can find goods only belong to you. Excellent quality, reasonable price, fast delivery…there is everything that you expect to find. coach factory outlet online featured with stylish leather bags and signature materials, and carry this bag, it can designate people seem to be captivatingly feminine and good-looking. Why not to buy one when it is at an affordable price?