Repelling Men on The Streets of Paris

Wondering why she looks so bitter? She hasn’t had sex since 2008.

Wondering why not? Take a look at the region south of her torso. Those are black denim slouch jeans, cuffed at the ankle. They do absolutely nothing conducive for what we can guess are a killer pair of stems. Without being distracted by her socks and boot-inspired tap dancing clogs, let’s take a look at the region north of her torso. Two layers of double breasting, one of which equipped with unusually long gray cape-like fabric, nice. That’s a tight top knot up there, sumo wrestler status. When’s the last time you ran a comb through your hair? 2007? Yikes. (Me too.)
And last, the thick frames over your eyeballs…what’s that you say? They’re not prescription? Ahuh.

Disclaimer: A rendition of every single piece forming this outfit in its’ entirety lives in my closet. I too, haven’t had sex since 2008.

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