What Do You Like About Yourself?
03.13.17
What-Do-You-Like-About-Yourself-Man-Repeller-Cog

Optimism-Month-Series-GIF

I like my hands, my feet, my freckles. I like that I’m like a cat, always soft and comfortable and brushing up against people I like. I like my curiosity, which isn’t related to the cat thing but might be. I like my freakish need to unpack myself and everyone and why we think and behave how we do. I like that I don’t shy away from internal conflict or the hard thing or the right thing, when I’m at my best. I like that I’m empathetic and forgiving. I like that I try really hard at life and care a lot in general. I like myself, for the most part.

Less likeable is my fear of publishing all those words. More annoying is my desire to temper or preface or follow up each one with a caveat or a counterpoint. It’s a little sick how impossible it feels to like ourselves these days. It’s the first thing we’re told to do (love yourself first!) and the last thing we’re supported in doing. Even harder is liking ourselves outside the narrow confines of what we’re told makes us likeable: being cute, successful, confident, happy, perfect, modest, whatever. They all smash up against each other and cancel each other out until the simple act of liking ourselves needs an international ad campaign slash grassroots hashtag or something. It’s all bad and VERY UNLIKEABLE.

That’s why I need you to tell me what you like about yourself. It will be good practice! Your hesitation is proof of the shitty stigma! I’ll take between one and 103 things. You owe me.

Illustration by Maria Jia Ling Pitt. 

Get more Brain Massage ?
  • Harling Ross

    Paragraph #1 is the coziest, truest ode to yourself and I agree with all of it. My favorite thing in this life is when you brush up against me like my very own Bug.

    • Bree

      I love how you guys love each other so well x

  • tmm16

    These things came to mind at first: My red hair, my sense of humor, my imagination, and my dedication and love for my friends and family. As a true Taurus, I’m very loyal and I take my relationships and friendships seriously. On my birthday last year, one of my best friends said to me, “You always go above and beyond [as a friend] and that’s why we love you.” That struck me hard.

    I “like” this optimistic message! Can’t wait to read the responses. We can focus on our flaws and weaknesses about ourselves, but it’s so important to take a moment and acknowledge our strengths and admirable qualities. They are what make us unique after all! 🙂

  • Tamar

    This is beautiful! Something I’ve been thinking a lot about lately (especially after MR’s great piece on it the other day) is the taking the idea of “body neutrality” into a broader “self neutrality”. It feels as though “loving ourselves” is the primary requirement in our lives as strong women, yet it is so, so hard. Especially when it’s human nature to pinpoint our own weaknesses, especially when no one is perfect, esPECIALLY when our bodies and our weaknesses and our flaws feel like greater reflections of ourselves than our actual selves. You know what takes immense strength? Having a real chat with yourself, acknowledging something you don’t like about yourself, and just…leaving it at that.

    I also love my nose and my lips.

  • Amy Musselman

    I’ll have to revisit the ‘things that I like’, but wanted to show up to say that I love this

  • Mariana

    I think the things that I like the most is the ones that causes me the most trouble to navigate in this life, that is putting myself in others shoes and taking pleasure in making others feel good.
    The first one makes me be a very empathic person that doesn’t explode for any reason (because I try to rationalize not only my actions but everyone’s actions) but someone that sometimes doesn’t commit to an opinion (I get my point, I get your point, so I don’t fight enough for my voice).
    The second one makes me feel bad when people around me are not feeling great because I feel I am not making enough to help and so I get external things more personally.
    Concluding: I don’t want to trade this things, I just want to learn to make them work in my favour in a more efficient way 🙂

    I also like my “weird” taste for sunglasses, glasses and shoes. I like being the one that my friends look for music advice. And like Lisa Simpson, “My interests include music, science, justice, animals, shapes, feelings” a middle child myself, I like a million different topics at the same time.

  • Julia Navratil

    I like that I constantly challenge my own perspective. Some call me indecisive, but I like to think questioning my internal processes keeps me forever learning. I like that, despite my people-pleasing nature, I address each conflict with an honest desire to hear the person on the other side. I like that I am the first to admit when I am wrong. I like my compulsive need to research whether the things I do negatively or positively impact my health. I like that I am most content when reflecting by myself. I like that I smile far too much.I like that having crazy abnormal food allergies forced me into a passion for cooking. Yes, the list of things I internally harass myself for may seem endless at times. Feelings of shame and inadequacy, fears of failure, and a terrible inkling that I’m nothing but a fraud surface on the regular. Though frequently rattled by social anxiety and the need to apologize for something, I am committed to becoming a stronger me. I am committed to growth and kindness. Love love love your writing, Haley! <3

    • libs

      I feel like I could’ve written this comment myself – sometimes my indecisive nature makes me hesitant to try things or take risks, but I think it’s so beneficial to actually building relationships with people and understanding them (and ourselves!) better, so I’m pretty happy with it. I’m so glad you are so positive about it!

  • Two things–

    One, I’m a good friend and daughter, that’s what I love about myself most. I take really great pride in it actually. I care for and support my friends, I’m sweet and respectful to my parents, I’m slow to anger and treat people kindly.

    And two, I love that I am curious. Being curious makes me more adventurous and spontaneous, I never quit learning, I meet more people and get to know people on a deeper level because I am truly curious about places and people.

  • Rheanonn Clarissa Perez

    i like that i’m fearlessly independent!!! i will not hesitate to do anything by myself. ANYTHING!!! i have moved to new york by myself. i’ve been to multiple concerts by myself. i’ll go out to eat by myself. i flew to LA for a solo trip for my last birthday. when i was as young as 12-years-old, i use to do 1 hour commutes to san francisco so i can go shopping by myself (a big deal for a small town girl lol). next year, i hope to go to tokyo by myself!!!

    this is truly my fav thing about myself bc it allows me to live life “to the fullest” & i think it shows i like myself in general to be in my own company so much. i’m not lonely, just alone 😉
    frheak.net

    • Mariana

      What a great quality to have!

      • zachary.mcbride@mail.ru

        I have earned 104,000 bucks previous year by doing an on-line job a­n­d I manage to accomplish that by w­o­r­k­i­n­g part-time f­o­r few hours a day. I was following work model I was introduced by this web-site i found online and I am amazed that i was able to make so much money. It’s so user-friendly and I’m so thankful that i discovered this. Here’s what I did… http://marketing25.weebly.com

    • AIS

      that’s so amazing and inspiring!
      a lot of people i know who can’t be by themselves aren’t completely at peace with themselves. they need a distraction. not you girl!

    • libs

      this is so impressive! and a trait that I’m trying to nurture in myself too. I hope you have lots more wonderful travels.

      • Rheanonn Clarissa Perez

        thanks! so will u 🙂

    • Renee LeBouef

      ME TOO!! Yay us! <3

      • Rheanonn Clarissa Perez

        woot woot!

    • Johanka C.

      This inspired me so much. You go girl ♥!

    • Ilara Dowling

      I love this and think independence is such a good quality to have. When I visited New York not long ago I took the subway by myself several times (may not sound like a big deal to a New Yorker but at first I was feeling majorly ‘Right I’m clueless and lost and terrified where do I go? This is not at all like the London Underground like I had hoped’) and it felt so good that I managed to get around and see so many amazing places. And not be clueless, not get lost and not die.

      I also think that being able to be by yourself is super important. I love being around others but also love that I can be independent enough to go and do my own thing if nobody wants to come along with me.

      Good luck with Tokyo next year, hope you get to go!

      • Rheanonn Perez

        aww good for you!! it’s cool that u went to ny by yourself but a little cooler that u didn’t depend on taxis/ubers which was probably tempting. when i travel i think it’s cool to experience the place like a ~local~ as much as u can!! i’m glad u enjoyed it!

        yah exactly, sometimes it’s better to go by yourself than to drag someone else along.

        thanks so much, i wish u the best!

    • leila hu

      That’s rly inspiring ! Thx you for sharing this, I’m working in a city far from home and barely know anyone . By reading your thoughts , I believe I can survive here by myself.

      • Rheanonn Perez

        yes, you definitely can, girl!

  • Andrea

    I like my eyes and the little yellow specks in them. I like that I can step on my pride when necessary. I like that I’m sensitive and feel every emotion, even the very fleeting ones. I like that my feet are calloused from years of dancing; like badges of honour. I like that I am honest person.

  • Gail Leoniak

    My intelligence. My eye color.

  • Rhea Kristen

    I am overjoyed that this is the discussion today. Many women, like myself are often pulled and tugged between ‘loving ourselves’ and ‘improving ourselves’.
    Though I did hesitate when thinking about what I love about myself, I realized that by not commenting on this post, I am contributing to the stigma.

    1) I like my sense of humour. Sometimes shrewd, sometimes corny, but most importantly, it can light up a room.
    2) I like my fingers. Years of studying piano has produced dainty, strong and flexible fingers
    3) I like my eyebrows. I used to be self conscious about them because they began to really ‘prosper’ (resembled sad furry caterpillars) at a time when wire-like eyebrows were the rave. Come 2015, 2016, and 2017: my friends wish they had my eyebrows.
    4) I like my perseverance. It helps me get through a lot even when I feel like giving up

  • Julie Meowmeows

    My brains, my hair and my weird sense humor. As my grandmother told me yesterday, “Red hair makes you smart!” 😆

  • withcurioushair

    I like the way my waist curves into my hips. I like my intuition, and how quickly I can read. I like my ability to bring different types of people together, and I like my optimism. Maybe it’s naive, but I really believe it’s all going to be okay in the end.

  • Annie

    I like how outgoing I am. I love talking to people, so I am able to try new things and meet new people with very little awkwardness. I also like my legs…they’re pretty thick, but I know it’s because they’re strong so I am ok with that. I also like how when I turned 30, a switch flipped in my head and I stopped giving as many fucks about what other people think about me.

    • Erica

      heck yeah girl! i feel the same about my legs too – they’ll never be able to slide into knee high boots without a struggle like other girl’s legs and i’m okay with that.

      also love embracing the idgaf mentality

      • Annie

        Girlllllll I feel you about the boots! 🙂 My mom got me Tory Burch riding boots for Christmas…they come in extended calf. You would have thought she bought me a puppy and a new car. 🙂

    • libs

      All of these are such admirable traits! The first one especially to me, I am so impressed.

      • Annie

        <3

  • Abi Newhouse Vaughn

    I like my loyalty. I love people and get attached easily, and I think that can be a really good thing. I like my eyes. I like my legs in tights. I am proud that I worked hard enough to get into an MFA program for creative writing, fully funded. I like that I have that dedication.

    I liked writing that, too. We should be nicer to ourselves.

    • libs

      congrats on your MFA acceptance – that’s incredible! these comments are all so lovely.

  • Lebanese Blonde

    I think I like most that I’m a good friend.

    I also like my waist, my writing, my cooking, and my memory.

  • Summer

    This article and comment section just make me SQUEE! I like that I’m curious about the world around me and that I’m comfortable in lots of different social situations. I like that I have a big heart and that, when I care about someone, I am there for them no matter what. Liking my body is harder, but I like my face.

  • Bo

    I like my strong moral/ethical compass; it always helps me choose the right course of action in hard situations. I like the reputation for consistent honesty that I’ve built up over the years; to wit that I can call things as I see them whilst others dart around fussing about etiquette and whatnot. I like how I stand up to bullies whenever I come across them, even if my voice is wavery and my eyesight darting about nervously when I do it – it sends them packing regardless. I like my wrists and the hairs on the tops of my feet. I like how I can’t be forced into doing anything I don’t want to (my parents still joke that I’m the one kid in school who never needed any drug awareness education because nobody would be able to convince me to try them in the first place). I like how attached I am to my family.

  • I like that I can rly, rly dance…California poppy luv 2 git down

    • libs

      I wish this was me, but – I like that I can’t dance yet I go for it anyway!

  • Tessa

    I like that I care so much, even if it’s to a fault. I like that I have a huge guilty conscience, so I could never royally screw someone over and live with myself at night. I like that I have a strong intuition and it helps direct me in difficult times. I like that I’m creative. I love seeing everything in design and color, it makes life so beautiful. I love that I have good taste in things (I think.) I like that I’m slowly but surely coming out of a dark time in my life and consciously re-learning to love myself.

  • my … inquisitiveness, the burning desire to learn, learn, learn – by thinking, feeling and experiencing / … stubborn love for life and quiet, persistent optimism no matter what (aka regardless of some really shitty times) …

  • Jessica

    I like that I’m obsessive. That i’m afraid of touching greasy things and I don’t try and seek out some immersion therapy to fix it, but instead just avoid something I don’t want to do or enjoy. I like that I’m not afraid to sing in front of people, or in public, or the car… and that my little 5 year old has no idea that others are because- all she knows is; when you want to sing in life…you sing. I like my shoulders. I like my sense of humor. I like my new wallpaper. And I really like Man Repeller. You are a bunch of great humans and I love having you in my day.

  • Grace B

    I like that I’m not afraid to do my own thing and go my own way, but that I see the value now (more than I ever have) of being part of a bigger group, community, and world. When I have more time I’ll read through these other responses, what a nice question!

  • E

    I like my eyes, mainly because they changed from blue to green within the past two years.

    But more importantly, I like that I am emotional. My mom told me recently we should never feel bad about our emotions, whether that means being frustrated, having a good cry, laughing uncontrollably, smiling while reading a text, hugging someone tightly because you love them or just plain feeling sad. For so long, I really tried to hide my emotions or keep them in check constantly in order to not rock the boat or feel like I was doing something wrong by feeling a certain way. I like that I do not hide my emotions from people I love/am close with. I try my hardest to not put up walls. Feeling feelings is important and it is something I have recently embraced about myself and have learned to love.

  • Andrea Raymer

    I really appreciate this thread so much! On Valentines day I threw a party at a women’s center that I volunteer with and as one of our activities I asked everyone to write on strips of paper things that we loved about ourselves and we made it into a big self-love chain.

    I like that I am not afraid to get excited about things.
    I like how much I care. I would rather care and be heartbroken than perpetually aloof.
    I like that my friends call me wise. That they are not afraid to come to me with their troubles and ask me for advice.
    I like that my hugs are powerful. I am not very affectionate, so when I give one I know that it matters and made a difference.

    • Erica

      “I like how much I care. I would rather care and be heartbroken than perpetually aloof.”

      YES! I’d way rather have my heart bruised a bit than feel absolutely nothing about guys (or people in general) that I’ve encountered. Life would be so boring and dull otherwise. It makes me feel like I’m an actual human being experiencing emotions!!!

  • Sarah

    I like that I’m always able to read people and can usually judge character well. Physically I’m really a fan of my hands and hair. I like that my hands look like my moms and that I have long fingers. I love love love that my hair does it’s own thing and always manages to match my mood and always acts like a mane. I think of it as my lioness mane that makes an entrance for me lol. It’s really poofy and curly and people always like to recommend anti-frizz stuff, so I try to shrug it off. But it is hard to do that when I see so many curly haired girls getting keratin and losing the curls! And I would feel weird actually telling people I’m proud of these aspects of myself, so I never voice these thoughts. It feels like I’d be bragging, but what am I supposed to do? Pretend I’m not proud of anything? Ugh

  • Sarah Bauer

    My mom, dad and I can talk for hours
    I can rip down a ski hill
    Music moves me in big ways – I cry a lot
    Poems can, too
    Bike rides set me free
    I will read 1,2, 3 or sometimes 4 books at a time
    I can really quickly get a conversation going with a stranger
    Long sleeves make me feel powerful
    When someone needs it, I know what song to play
    There has been a lot of Joni Mitchell in my life
    When Britney hears Modern Love by David Bowie, she thinks of me
    Sam’s mom and I have great conversations.
    I love my writer’s callus on my left hand’s ring finger

  • Alexis Thomolaris

    I love how much I care about others and how much I make others laugh uncontrollably over the stupidest of things. I love how hard and fast I love and how much I need those around me. I love my comfort zone and my ability to stand up for what I believe in, consequences aside. I love that I am there for myself to rely on and that my own inner monologue is someone I can almost always count on.

  • Helena

    I like how I refuse to take shit from anyone. That sounds a little hyperbolic but it’s a skill I’ve developed that’s come from a journey of learning about myself and using that gained knowledge to help build confidence and allow me to know that I never have to settle for anything less than I feel I deserve; whether that’s based on the way I’m being treated by a friend or partner, in my sex life, or the way I go about setting professional goals.

  • Ariana

    I’m relentless when it comes to my professional life and learning. As a woman in STEM, I feel the pressure to always be ‘on’ and constantly hitting the mark. I’m fresh out of school and working at a fast paced firm in NYC and I’ve learned so much about my field and have opened opportunities for myself that I never thought would be possible. This was all due to being persistent and relentless with my peers and clients in constantly wanting to improve our team’s internal workflows, features, and processes all in the hopes of making our clients happy. I also just got into a part time management program even after being discouraged due to my age and less than 1 year of full time experience out of school. Knowing what I can do and what I don’t know also helps out 😀 I’m turning 23 next week and I’m very excited to see what this year brings.

    I also really like my eyebrows. I don’t need to do anything to them except the once-every-other-month threading but they really scream “business”

    I adore my friends with all my heart. Them and my family are my lifeline and they’re always there when the going gets tough. They keep me accountable and remind me where I come from. We are a product of our environment and I am so very proud that I can say they are a part of mine.

  • Natasha

    I love this post so much. And every single one of the comments under it 🙂

    I like that I’m a fair person. I am considerate and conscientious and really try to understand and take care of how I make other people feel. I like how as I get older, this becomes more of a strength and less of a weakness (because I am learning the difference between doing the right thing and doing the pleasing thing). I like my sense of humor, my ability to adapt to many different social situations. I like that I’m Dutch and Indonesian, that I can feel at home in both countries and cultures. I like how close I am to my parents, how I am able to open up emotionally to the people I love and that I am always learning.

    And.. I love my hands. No but seriously, I could be a hand model.

    • Kelsey

      Same on the hands thing! Hand model twinsies!

      • Natasha

        <3 high five

  • Libby Kane

    I like who I am becoming.

    I like how I’m finally in the home stretch of teen confusion (that’s arguably just twisting into uni confusion, but, whatever) and into a firmer sense of my self, and I like – mostly – who that is. I like that I recognise silly or stupid things I did before and grow from them. I like that I am learning and changing every day.

  • libs

    I like who I am becoming.

    I like how I’m finally in the home stretch of teen confusion (that’s arguably just twisting into uni confusion, but, whatever) and into a firmer sense of my self, and I like- mostly – who that is. I like that I recognise silly or stupid things Idid before and grow from them. I like that I am learning and changing every day.

  • Renee LeBouef

    I like that I am a Cajun from a VERY tiny bayou town in Louisiana, so people in NYC – where I hope to live SOON – find my upbringing, accent and every little random detail about me very interesting. It makes me feel so unique. I love my legs, which look amazing in open toed sandals. I love my teeth and the fact that I don’t ever have to/care to wear lipstick AND, when I do, my teeth only look even sparklier. I love how outgoing I am and that people always think of me as the funny one, and that guys always find me hilarious, apparently a very useful trait in friendships. I love that I am BOMB at presentations at work and that my boss values what I bring to the table in new business meetings.

    ….ok, this was fucking awesome. I feel so great about myself now! THANK YOU Haley!! Life is great!

  • Amanda

    I like the friends I make; I have friends that other people want to be friends with. I’ve moved quite a bit in my 20s and 30s and always end up meeting awesome people and making new best friends. In writing this, I’m thinking “WTF, why do I keep moving away from these crazy cool people?” but alas, I do. I’m not sure what they see in me (I’m fairly boring) but, yeah, I make good friends and that’s what I like best about myself.

  • Jen

    This is so lovely! And interesting- I didn’t want to write ~too many~ things I like about myself. Like you can’t like yourself too much or else. Nope. REJECTING THAT.

    I like how I treat the people around me, especially my close relationships. I’m very vocal when I care, and I like that.
    I like that I rarely feel “stuck” and even if I’m having a shitty time of something, I believe I have some power to change either the situation or my perspective or how I deal with it.
    I like that I’m objective, I like my love of efficiency (even if sometimes it drives me crazy), I like my intuitiveness & reflectiveness. I like my hair, I like my skin (even though it’s given me hell with acne, the tone is nice and I think a little scarring adds character ;)) I like that I am quite spiritual & religious. I like that I see others’ perspectives quite easily. I like that I can speak up when I disagree, even to someone i find intimidating. I like that I almost always see the good/beauty in others.

    This is a great idea and I want to share it!

  • Jelena K

    Just reading the comments in this thread makes me feel so good, I’m so glad people are opening up about these things, because I know how hard it can be sometimes to remember *the good stuff* in your life.

    I like how I’m sensitive (used to dislike that one). I like that I work on becoming a better person and grow a little bit every day. I like how much love I feel for my friends. I like that I’ve recently learned how to forgive and be kind to myself. I like my broad interests. I like how I memorize things quickly with a few tricks. I like my nails. I like that I don’t mind going anywhere alone, by myself. I like my natural hair colour. I like how I always try to spoil the people I love.

    Oh, and being sensitive and emotional was basically the first thing that I had in mind, it makes my heart warm to see so many others think it’s an asset as well 🙂

  • Alex S

    I like the way I express myself and my silliness. I take life both very seriously – which keeps me motivated and productive – and not seriously at all – which keeps me sane and happy. I like my legs, my hair, and my smile. I love that I despite any discomfort, I’m intrinsically driven to pursue things that make me nervous for the sheer thrill it brings, whether it’s bungee jumping, applying for a dream job, moving to a new city, or speaking in front of hundreds of people.

    I appreciate the degree to which I look for meaning in life. It makes life quite the work of art.

    De plus, j’adore mon bilinguisme.

  • chouette

    I like feeling like I’m growing up, and being aware of it. I feel like I’m gaining real wisdom as I get older. I like the clarity I’m gaining and how I can see the big picture more often than not, and not get bogged down in the minutiae of details. I like my vocabulary stemming from my love of reading and that people know about my obsessive quest and thirst for knowledge, and want to share facts with me. I like that the people that know me know I’m on my own path but it’s working for me.

  • sarah

    I like my perspective on the world. I grew up in different countries and love diverse cultures and otherness. I’m very independent but also have spent the last few years cultivating interdependence with my little community of people I love; I’m a really good cook; I read a lot of books. I like that I can fix most things myself and see solutions in problems most people miss. I like that I’m very strong. I like that I have memorized dozens of poems by heart. I like that I’m loyal. I like my freckles, my newfound muscle definition now that I’m serious about the gym for the first time in my life, my legs and my décolletage 🙌🏼

  • Flic

    I like that I’m easily pleased and naturally happy. My little waist and big hips. My wonky nose passed down from my Granddad.

  • Gracie

    I like that I stand up for myself. I’ve rarely let anyone treat me poorly or blame me for something I didn’t do, even if it means sacrificing a friendship.

  • Christina

    I like that I stand up for myself

  • Mads

    I like my skin and my eyelashes. I like that I’m a good dancer. I like that I’m a bit introverted, and that I can be the life of the party at my best. I like that I’m tolerant. I like that I feel the need to be busy, active, productive all the time.

  • Catgirl

    I like my laugh, it often stops conversation in a room because it’s awkward and loud and my friends tell me I sound like a goose. But I like it because once the room stops talking from hearing my guffaws, they join in and laugh too. So if my laugh alone can make people laugh, that brings me a lot of joy, even if they’re maybe laughing at me.

  • Adrianna

    I like my breasts. I like that I don’t feel bad that my breasts are the first thing I thought of. I like my freckles. I like my eyebrows. I like my lips. I like that I have no desire to wear make up. I like my teeth, and I like that I paid thousands of dollars to fix something I didn’t like at age 27.

    I like that I have always known “who I was” and didn’t relate to the dilemma. I like that I’m introverted. I like that I can argue that Anna Karenina to Vanderpump Rules have a lot in common.

    • autillicautnullibi

      Haha, that last bit! We would be friends.

  • miss_smartypants

    I like that I am always able to amuse myself. I told my best friend that and she said, “I love that about you. It’s like you’re your own candy bar! “

  • Bailey Stark

    I like my smile and my laugh, and how easily I can smile and laugh.
    I like how I have an amazing relationship with my family and friends.
    I like how I’ve gotten so comfortable with myself that I can go out in public without makeup and not feel self conscious, but also how I can go out with a full face of makeup and feel just as comfortable.

  • Kubla

    I like that I am pure perfect consciousness. I also like my current raincoat collection and bathing suits drawer. I like that I am psychic. I like my speedy mind and I also like that I like to lie around and do nothing a lot. I like the nature of my being which is so much like the nature of everyone else’s being and I like that it’s also a bit unique. How? I like the discovery process of learning how I am unique and it’s always surprising to know myself from moment to moment.

  • I love my body and now more than ever and the act of loving it, feels like a form of protest.

    This body is mine, it ran track, it played rugby, it broke bones, it kissed some fine ass boys, some not so fine boys, it wore clothes, it cried, it got smaller and got bigger. It lost love and loved ones. This is my body and now more than ever, as this body is challenged or looked down upon. I pour more love into it. Because if I died tomorrow, it would be better to have left this earth loving the roundness and curves than hating myself. Think about the time wasted not loving something that holds your soul? I literally don’t have time for it.

    Now more than ever, I notice how society tries to police or control women’s bodies and I want to claim mine as my own loudly. I love my body so I fuel it the best I can. I love my butt. I still want a Serena Williams butt so I go to the Gym and I try to put in Serena Williams work. I love this body so I paid 5.99 for a Kombucha, on Saturday morning because I was hungover and that shit is magic. I love the skin, that covers this big body, it’s brown. I love my heart because at night when I close my eyes and lay my hand over my chest and I touch my chest, I feel my skin and listen to the sound of my beating heart inside my big brown body and I pour love into myself for my sisters, for girls like me and girls who don’t like me.

  • autillicautnullibi

    I love my strength. I love how deeply I care for other people and my true joy in service. I love my butt. I love how hardworking I am. I’m learning to love my sensitivity, even if I cry at inopportune times.

  • Gene

    I like how my body created and delivered another human. I like how my perspective changed after and how very few fucks I now give about trivial inconsequential things. I like my self awareness about my introverted brain and how to take care of myself accordingly. I like how much I think outside “the box”.

  • Emma Connelly

    I have a wicked sense of humor in part because I am deeply observant. This also helps me to be a good friend, sister, daughter, worker, etc. because I feel like I understand people better than most. I am deeply empathetic. Good lips and eyebrows. I like my arms. Great chest. Independent. LOUD AS HELL

  • Lil

    “More annoying is my desire to temper or preface or follow up each one with a caveat or a counterpoint. It’s a little sick how impossible it feels to like ourselves these days.” I’ve been thinking a lot about this lately. It’s taken me years to love myself. Yet in the back of my head, I couldn’t help but feel that maybe I’m just being egotistical. But we shouldn’t have to justify self-love, so thank you so much MR for this article! 🙂

    I like how being optimistic is just my natural state. I like that I’m not easily annoyed, angered, or even bored. I like how persevering I am. I like how bold I am, I can go up to whoever and never feel weird about it. I like that I’ve always been able to go anywhere alone, be it a party or traveling.
    I like that I rarely notice other’s physical appearances. If someone makes a comment about how someone looks, be it positive or not, the first thing that’ll cross my mind is, “Oh, huh. Never noticed.” I like that I’m really understanding. I like that if someone’s acting strange, I’ll always give them benefit of the doubt rather than assume something horrid of them.

    I like how I can go weeks without shaving and that my legs will still look decent. I like my hair and how I can just shower and go. I like the color of my lips and how plump they are.

  • Katrina Elizabeth

    I like my hair. It’s fine but there is a lot of it, and it has allowed me to have every possible hair style. I can do black, blue, blonde, grey, pink, purple, and my natural dark brown.

    It’s been some variety of short for the last six years and it has taught me so much about myself and others. People perceive you a certain way when you have short hair – good ways and bad ways – and it has sparked many conversations. My hair has been the source of ridicule and the source of inspiration. Ultimately it has taught me a lot about what I value.

    My hair isn’t just hair, really.

  • shu

    i like my dimple, especially when my face is rounder from eating a lot the day before, so it’s a little more deeper so i look even more like a fetus than i already do.
    i like that i’m capable of living on my own and being independent!! i love doing things by myself: taking walks, shopping, eating, cooking, etc. i honestly could live the rest of my life just living on my own.
    i like that i’m really sarcastic and kind of quick on my feet about responses, but i know when to be serious and take things seriously.
    i like that i have great taste in food, clothes, and people i surround myself with because i know that at least 5 years from now, i can look back and be content with the decisions i’ve made and be able to live satisfactorily. i think it’s important to know yourself before and maybe even during your prime years because that’s the type of person you’re going to be for a long time before old age and arthritis hits.

  • Brooke W

    I my sense of humor. I like my curiosity and ability to ask questions. I like my honestly. I like my work ethic. I love my love of dogs. I love my ability to listen to and help others. I love my smile. I like my long, thick, curly hair. I like my athleticism. I like my approach to problems or crisis. I like that I am brave enough to write these down. I am grateful for this post.

  • Taylor Thomas

    I like that I finally started commenting on my favorite website, Man Repeller! I like that I’m smart and have begun to embrace my intelligence. I like that I laugh often. I like that I have started to realize my potential. I like my hair. I like my calves. I like that I see both sides of every story.

  • Gabrielle

    cool. this is hard but all the more reason to try (I like that I like a challenge).
    I like my curiosity too, and I like my dorky personality and sense of humour. I like my stubbornness and individuality (maybe that’s the same as dorky personality, whatever). I like that I’m kind, and caring, and I like my aesthetic (the most obvious thing anyone can say about themselves…). I like that I’m obsessive and radical about things like thrift/vintage/recycling almost everything. I also like that I’m a bit reckless and emotionally honest and unapologetically weird/different. 🙂

  • Hannah Cole

    I’ve even come to like my over-thing-ness. It’s frustrating about 94% of the time, but at least I will always be reminded that I am alive and my brain is indeed alive and kicking.

  • Kristina

    I like that I am the type of person who befriends people who need it. I like that I’m kind to everyone and am deeply empathetic. I like my the-more-the-merrier mentality when it comes to sharing and welcoming others. I like that I do my best to lift my friends up. I like that I love to learn and have a rich, creative inner life. I like that I don’t depend on another person for my happiness. I like that I dance even though I’m terrible at it. I like that I make my friends laugh. I like that they describe me as sunshine even when I don’t feel like it, and I like knowing that I’m working toward being my radiant, best self.

  • Ecem

    I love my sensitivity. I love my own company. I love my fascination with books and nailpolish. I love my nails. I love my relentless ability to love. I love my brain. I love my thick frizzy unrully Turkish hair. I love my faith in humanity. I love my colourful sock collection. I love my name. I love the woman i am, mistakes and all.

  • Rebecca

    I love this discussion. We are told all the time to love ourselves but so frequently I see women tearing other women down for doing just this. I can’t tell you how often I’ve heard friends be bitchy about a confident woman whose comfortable in her own skin, saying she’s full of herself or she thinks she’s all that with the implication of course being that she isn’t so she really shouldn’t like herself. I’ve been guilty of it myself. And whilst I’m not proud of it, I like that I can admit it.

    On a more personal note, as someone who struggles with depression and body image, it can be incredibly difficult to find things I like let alone love about myself. Sometime I’m so full of self-loathing that I can’t face my reflection in the mirror. But I can say it here…I love my eyes. They’re not my best feature or particularly beautiful but they’re uniquely mine and they’re honest. I like that when I smile I screw up my whole face in the same way I did as a toddler. I love my moles, especially the one on my ear. I love that I fight even when it exhausts every fibre of my being. I love that I’m a perfectionist even though I’ve been told repeatedly in therapy that it’s a problem. I love that I’m kind. I love my love of animals. I love that they know I love them and they trust me insitinctively. I like that I can admit to being a hypocrite by still wearing leather shoes. I love my temper. It means that I care and if my words hurt you I will apologise and mean it. I love that I love books. I love that I love crazy clothes and bright colours and I love it when my friends say I’d never wear that but it’s very you. I love that I’m me with all my insecurities, faults and flaws. And I love that I can say that.

    • Voovoo

      I feel like you just checked off everything I would’ve said. The ability to admit self loathing.. Temper.. Moles… Loving animals, but wearing leather and knowing it’s hypocritical.. being bitchy when other women express self love..Well written, well said.

  • Eve Oswald

    I like that there’s a fire in me that URGES me not to settle for a normal life.
    I like that if a little old lady is short of change at the thrift shop, i’ll step in immediately
    I like that i loathe being the same as everyone else, I refuse to wear what everyone else is wearing and put my money in second hand shops and cruelty free brands.
    I like that I have lots of neighbourhood cats that I go visit on my runs!!
    I like that my hunt for quirky, funny, and intelligent fashion blogs lead me to Man Repeller !!!

    LOVE YOU GUYS! Thank you for igniting the creative fire in me, that’s a gift that keeps on giving <3

    egoeyestyle@squarespace.com

  • Amelia Archer

    I like my calves, I like my confidence, I like my nerdiness, I like my high earning potential as an about-to-graduate computer science major. I like my kindness and how I love to give and care.

  • Carlyan Castellano

    I like my adaptability, my curiosity, and my appreciation towards life and the people that fill it. I like my overbite, the freckles on my shoulders, and my lips.
    I like that I recognize that at 23, I’m still a baby. It helps me remember that even with the things I don’t love about myself (yet!) I still have time to learn how.

  • Marcela

    I love my eyes. I love that I can sit in silence and be with myself. I love my empathic nature. I love my olive skin!
    This was v therapeutic by the way.

  • I like that I collect hobbies almost compulsively. I like that I am not afraid to try a new form of art when I feel like it. I like that I am independent. I like that I am more the quiet observer type than the loud notice me type. I like that I can cook and that I’m good at it. I like my weird button nose and my eyelashes and my teeth and my wrists. I like that I’m a better listener than talker. I like that I am sensitive to the things around me – people, animals, nature, sounds, smells – I feel very much a part of the world. I like being a contradiction and surprising people with things they don’t know about me. I like where I’ve come from and my ancestry and how my life was growing up. I like that I like being alone most of the time.

    Sometimes it’s hard to love ourselves, but it’s important to give ourselves credit for the ways we succeed, and to be the supportive individual we need to be for ourselves and others around us.

    Thanks for inviting us to participate. I actually feel a lot better having done this.

  • lily

    I like that I try hard for the things that I want. I like that everything makes me laugh. I like that I am not afraid to tell someone when they have cut me in line. I like that I make friends with babies and children easily. I like that I know the right time to hard boil an egg until. I like that I am so close with my parents. I like that I am loud. I like that I am getting better at things like drinking more water and boring adult stuff like budgets. I like my nose. I like my tattoo.

  • I like that I’m a badass motherfucker who don’t take no shit from nobody, but I’m quiet enough people think I’m nice, so I don’t often have to worry about shittaking. I like my inability to not quote a movie when the opportunity arises. I like my hair, which highlights naturally in the sun and is stick straight and fine, never tangling. I like that I have cute, proportional feet, and I’m never self conscious about wearing sandals. I like that I’m a bookworm and a nerd who also likes football, and I love my inquisitive nature.

    I like that this was easier to do than I thought. I’m proud of myself.

  • Camilla Rimoldi

    I like the fact that despite all the mistakes I can make and my awful inability to answer to people in time, I am a careful person. What I want is acting more carefully with other people in life then just my partner – I feel like I am concentrating all my energy towards him. But I’m going O.T…. It’s easier for me to state what I don’t like about me, but I will try: I like having blue eyes. I like my legs and I like that a short skirt will never embarass me. I like what I have achieved. I like that I started from an Italian village hating my surroundings and now I am in a city I chose in a new environment with people I love and love me, but who have no connection with my past. I like that I am interested in fashion and that my style can be interesting or nice for somebody else. I like having a penchant for languages and a natural talent for them. I like that I stand up to women that I consider my model.

  • Shauna King

    I like my hazel eyes, the shape of my fingernails and my curly dark hair. I like that I’m honest and blunt. I like that I can never tell a lie because my face always reveals my emotions. I like that I care deeply for others, especially children. I like that I will stand up for what I believe in and speak up when I hear something insensitive or cruel. I like that I am unpredictable and constantly surprising and amusing those around me. I like that I have a multifaceted personality and I can be both shy and loud. I like that I am self-aware of my feelings and thoughts.

  • Devon Alexandra

    I am kind, goddamnnit. I value it more than being intelligent or funny or intriguing or aesthetically pleasing. And for every time I put myself out there and had my kindness taken advantage of, I refuse to give it up. I hold steadfastly to it.

  • StrawberryFrostedDoughnut

    I’ve never been on Man Repeller before, but I stumbled across this article and it totally made my day. Haley, you and all the women who have commented here are inspirational. Why should it be so discouraged in society for women to actually like themselves? I really like the “F the patriarchy” defiance and positivity here.

    Things I like about myself: I’m an unapologetic nerd. I have pretty handwriting. I love doing the activities that I enjoy, even when I’m not at all talented at them (dancing, sports of any kind, drawing, etc.). I have very strong allegiances to particular sports teams (GO BLUE!). My eyes crinkle when I smile. I’ll be there for my friends and family no matter what. Although I’m painfully shy, I’m decent at making friends when I’m thrown into a new situation. I’m passionate about classic rock music, and rock out to it while I cook and clean. I’m not ashamed of my mental illness anymore. I’ve made it through four challenging years of grad school.

    Thank you for this lovely opportunity! It feels so good to appreciate myself 🙂

  • Catherine

    I like how much I feel. Sometimes it gets in the way like when I notice that my group of friends is the loudest in the restaurant and I’m driven nuts by the people staring, giving us the stink eye. But most times, I love my empathy. I love the closeness it lends to, and how it’s a quality that creates such strong relationships for me.

  • Shelley

    I like that my favorite shoes are Birkenstocks. And that I call all footwear ‘shoes.’ I like that I am a hard worker. I like that I give people the benefit of the doubt most of the time and that I encourage others to do the same. I like my belly because I feel like a Venus statue.

    I like that this is my first MR comment 🙂

  • Anne Dyer

    When I was a little girl my friend asked what I liked about my face the most. I stood looking in the mirror for a long time and smiled. “Hm. I like my eyes, I like my lips, I like my nose and my smile. I really don’t know which thing I like best, I like it all.” My mother literally never criticized herself and I never learned to either. I’m so thankful to have learned that it’s okay to really like yourself. If it comes from a humble place it helps you like others more too.

  • I’m writing this down because I’ve been more aware of my shortcomings lately, and I can only keep working to improve myself, while loving what I’m good at.
    I like my slender hands and long legs. I come to like my slightly odd facial features that I’ve realized are the same ones my sweet parents have. I like that I am a loyal, supportive friend, and the awareness that I would do anything for my siblings. I like my sense of adventure and excitement for new experiences, which is balanced with a love of the domestic and routine. I like that I am conscious of my flaws, and have been working to be better.

  • Ilara Dowling

    I like, in fact LOVE, that I am registered blind and yet it has never put me down or got in the way of my hard work or dreams, because I haven’t allowed it to. I like my ability to see positivity – the good things in life – even when I can’t sometimes see what is literally in front of me. I like how open and thoughtful I am, both with myself and others. I like how excited I get over the littlest things.

    You know what, I could actually go on about this for a while because I really have become someone who is proud of themselves and loves themselves, and I’ve finally managed to start treating myself as well as I treat the people around me.

  • Olivia Adamczyk

    I like my empathy for others. I like my dedication to the commitments I’ve made. I like my sense of style, where I clash patterns and colours and textures in whatever way pleases me.

    Yay for this 🙂

    I also like all the things all you women write. Rock on

  • caramia

    I like that I am emotionally intelligent.
    I like my relationship with food and cooking, and that the people I love enjoy the meals I prepare.
    I like my boobs and my legs.
    I like that despite all evidence to the contrary, I still have hope that I’ll meet someone amazing, fall in love and grow old with them.
    I like that I’m mouthy and honest and say what I think.
    I like that I’m quick to laugh.

  • Brittany Roscillo

    This is so lovely.
    Here goes..I like that I am a voice of reason. I like that I can make decisions for a crowd without being pushy. I like that my eyes are often described the color of honey. I like that I usually can’t get out a story without laughing. I like that I am fiercely loyal to the idea that your best is always good enough. I like that I appreciate the silver linings. I like that I swim upstream in personal growth understanding its a process and not a destination…I think, I’ll keep at that for now 🙂

  • elpug

    I like that I am neat and clean, which keeps my wild creative mind that I love a little more sane. I like that I love small things such as animals and tiny humans. I like that I love the environment and care for it. I like that I can schedule appointments and have productive days. I like that I can set aside days off just for me. I like that I am a good dog mom. I like that I am passionate. I like that I’m not afraid to stand my ground. I like that I have lows to enjoy all of life’s highs. I like that I am athletic and active. I like that I am more than comfortable being around just myself. I like that I am me.

  • lauviga

    I like that I am impulsive a little it careless, and this trait allowed me to go places, know people and travel alone, even if it meant sacrifice at first. I like that I am always trying to smile and being positive towards life. I love my smile. I love that I love life. I love how I love love and how i jump into people, regardless of what will happen. I love that I am a strong independent woman when it comes to carrier and still a little girl when it comes to affection. I love how I know that in the end, it is always going to be me, and how I know I will poke with whatever comes.
    I also like that I hate myself sometimes, because it allows me to grow.
    I think I like who I want to be and I like that I am trying really hard to get to that point.

  • Mar

    I like that I’m kind and compassionate. Also, a few years ago I had a nervous breakdown/ spiritual awakening and I had to go to therapy. It’s the bravest and most terrifying thing I’ve ever done. It’s made me super resilient and I f*cking love that. I’m super proud of myself.