The last time my phone broke I went into a full-out panic—not because I would have to sell my soul to buy another (which I did, and so if you’re confused about why the pupils of my eyes lead into a dark abyss, there you have it) but because I had no idea how on earth I was going to wake up for work the next day; I don’t own a clock, my rooster quit a few weeks earlier, and as for watches?
I own three…but none of them actually work.
They do, however, decorate my arm in the most complimentary fashion when paired with a few bangles and the band around my wrist which designated me Of Age to drink at a Taylor Swift concert.
Leandra also wears watches as decoration. In fact, a few years ago she used to wear two at a time. It looked cool but confused everyone and if you’ve read her book (SHAMELESS BUTT-PLUG: if you haven’t read it, check it here) then you know that while the two men she fully accosted on the subway had no problem with her all-denim ensemble of the day, one did ask, “Why the fuck are you wearing two watches?”
Because watches have become jewelry.
One could argue that watches have always been designed as a type of jewelry, but up until the omnipresence of the cell phone, watches had a purpose other than decoration. I think my dad is the last human being I’m aware of who actually uses his watch to tell time. It’s called an Easy Reader because the numbers are so large and the face lights up should he be confronted with a time-telling scenario in a dark room.
It may seem we’re really hating on phones as of late — or at least questioning their effect on our own generation. No matter what, we still need them, and I’m probably going to call back the asshole who has my collateral soul to see if I can possibly upgrade to the newest iPhone model (maybe he’d take a toe or something. I just really want the gold case!), but what if we turned back time and started using watches as watches again?
Let’s do it together. If not for the sake my soul or our Gen-Y happiness, than perhaps in the name of Lewis Carroll and his very late white rabbit. I can’t bear the thought of reading Alice in Wonderland to my future daughter and having to explain what a pocket watch is.
And now it’s your turn, Chesire Cats and meme-y kittens; tell us, do you wear a watch to tell time? Will you? Should you? Or do you just let it dangle off your wrist like an awesome piece of jewelry?
Plaid-o-watches, found here: Braun x Dieter Rams at Mr. Porter, 24/7 Wrap Around watch and Moustache Face at ASOS. Gold, orange, pink and white watches are Leandra’s own. They may or may not still tell time. Street style image: photographer unknown, (and if you know, tell us!). Illustration by John Tenniel from Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland, photoshopped by Charlotte Fassler.