Beyoncé to a T

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by Leandra Medine
March 26, 2014
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Like an overplayed song or, say, a human, a joke can get old. And you can usually feel its death approaching via two warning signs before it actually settles. The first reveals itself when the joke in question is some sort of parody and remix that has been so fleshed out you can’t even locate the original version of said joke.

The second sign for the end of a punchline — though perhaps this may signal the actual funeral — is when the least funny person you know has posted the meme to their Instagram account. I mean, that’s when you really know it’s over. When it’s time to throw in the towel and pray that someone makes a new joke real fast.

There are rare occurrences, though, when the joke — or the song (but never the human) — feels immortal. The Notorious B.I.G.’s “Juicy,” for example. That will never get old. Watching people fall down? That will never get old.

Beyonce’s “Drunk in Love,” which we have referenced how many times since the album dropped, and her artistically-licensed albeit still completely mind-boggling addition of the errant-ass-letter “T” to the word “surfboard,” well that…might actually get old.

So, before we become like the kid who means well but is super annoying because every time you see him in the hallway he’s like, “Hey! [Insert dead inside joke here that was only funny once and even then only elicited a brief cackle],” we decided to really get on the SURFBOART T-train and ride it to its last destination, which leaves us tranferring at, yes, the B-train. No stops, one transfer, and jokes. Lots of the same joke.

Here’s our list:

BoarTroom

ChalkboarT

All AboarT the Bey Train

KeyboarT

College BoarT

BoardT Game

BoredT teenager

SmorgasboardT

BoardTwalk Empire

Don’t let the joke die. The T needs you. Beyoncé needs you. We need you. So tell us yours, and long live the Queent.

– Team Man Repeller

REPLIES
  • http://adeliberateimagination.wordpress.com/ CJKEYS2

    The other queen, Martha Stewart, chops her cucumberTs on a cuttingboarT.

  • lavieenliz
  • http://adeliberateimagination.wordpress.com/ CJKEYS2

    Remember when Lauren CondradT dated BrodTy Jenner?

  • http://www.natseesstyle.com/ Nat Way

    How can we forget the Star of Davidt and Karl Lagerfeldt?

  • http://alcessa.wordpress.com/ alcessa

    … a loose floor boardt creakedt as the boredt woman in the chair rockedt back and fordth … oops!

    As someone once told me: one can never have enough Queen B. :-)

  • Tara Chacón

    the joke really was great. final additions warranted and appreciated.

  • Quinn Halman

    Beyonce should’ve ridden on a fjordT horse in the “Run the World” video

    • Amelia Diamond

      Quinn For the Win for that esoteric yet completely valid Norwegian horse reference

  • Marianne

    I’m really glad that you’re putting this joke to rest. Hopefully your obsession with Beyonce will be put to rest as well.

    • Leandra Medine

      But…but…but….BEY!!!

  • http://www.ellaetcetera.com/ Ella

    Drove by this BillborT the other day…

    xx Ella
    http://www.ellaetcetera.com

    • Leandra Medine

      SO YOU MEAN TO TELL US THAT WE ARE MARKETING GENIUSES?

  • http://fashionmusingsdiary.blogspot.fr/ Miss J.
  • http://patternedposies.blogspot.com Grace Mattei

    I’m dead, this is hilarious. I love when people articulate things that have been floating around in my head forever but I just couldn’t figured out the right words to say them with. Also, I’ve pretty much been over Beyonce since everyone started worshipping her for no apparent reason, so I’d be cool with it if she was phased out along with her stupid surfboardt. Amen. Ride that wave on out, B…

  • Oliver Lips

    Hahaha so great!

  • TheEditorInChic

    VisionBoardT