A Case For Fake Holidays
People in the media love to hate on fake holidays, and for good reason. If you’re writing about a certain National [Blank] Day, chances are you’re strapped for content. But there’s also a slight possibility that you’re a fake holiday-loving person like me who will take any excuse to celebrate…anything.
It’s always a pleasant surprise to learn that it’s National Whatever Day not only because it’s an excuse to indulge in something random, but also because HOLIDAYS = DISCOUNTS. National Tequila Day, for example, meant city-wide discounts on margaritas. It also meant that had it not been National Tequila Day, my wallet and my hungover self would have been much happier the following morning. Such is the fake holiday conundrum: to jubilee or not to jubilee?
Jubilee. The answer is always jubilee. Why wouldn’t you want to celebrate a fake holiday? You can take off work for National Nap on a Weekday Day (May 11) or, even better, there’s National Recess at Work Day (August 21). With 365 days in a year, there’s no doubt a fake holiday out there for everyone.
Here are some of my favorite fake holidays if you’re still not sold:
1. Static Electricity Day (January 9)
2. Answer Your Cat’s Questions Day (January 22)
3. Laugh and Get Rich Day (February 8)
4. What if Cats Had Opposable Thumbs Day (March 3)
5. No Pants Day (May 2)
6. Plan Your Epitaph Day (July 23)
7. Ask a Stupid Question Day (September 30)
8. Evaluate Your Life Day (October 19)
9. Bird Herders Day (December 15)
10. Fake Holiday Appreciation Day (hereby decreed by yours truly)
Are you celebrating? If so, are we invited?