Relationship Clothes
Stuff you can only wear if you have a partner because it takes more than two hands to get on.
Reverse Camel Toe
When your pants are so tight, your camel toe downgrades and moves from business class to economy if you know what I'm saying.
Repressed Larry David Syndrome (RLDS)
The realization that you have the same misanthropic tendencies of a cranky middle aged man who created "Seinfeld."