Everything You Need to Know About the Grammys in Under 5 Minutes

  • Taylor Swift: tonic for the soul and Grammys crop top wearer. (Photographed by Jordan Strauss/Invision/AP via Daily News)
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Alison Syrett | February 16, 2016

Today you belong to one of two tribes: those who know that Rag & Bone showed a fantastic traffic cone orange parka at 8 p.m. last night, and those who watched the Grammys instead of NYFW. Should you fall in the former category, stop the frantic back-scrolling on Twitter; cease the fruitless Instagram cram session. You can have your runway collections and eat your award shows, too, thanks to this breakfast of bullet points from last night’s big musical event. Maple syrup topping optional.

Pre-Show Bieber

Forget the backstage preparations. Move past the celebrity primping. The only thing worth watching before the cameras officially began to roll was Justin Bieber and James Corden’s reunion for a pre-Grammy round of carpool karaoke. Male moisturizing and “Uptown Funk” were involved.

The Meme Carpet

1. Taylor Swift arrived in a Versace Atelier tangerine bandeau, pink underwear cape (both of which the Internet is comparing to Larisa Oleynik’s 10 Things I Hate About You prom dress) and an Anna Wintour bob. She posed for a lot of pictures with Selena Gomez (in navy blue as-of-yet-memed-dress by Calvin Klein Collection).

Photographed by Jordan Strauss/Invision/AP via Daily News

Other notable Grammy’s fashion memes: Justin Bieber as an Olive Garden waiter (kind of funny), Ariana Grande in a red carpet (the dress was literally just red) and Sam Hunt as the Pink Panther.

2. Also meme’d (she was compared to the Magic School Bus’s Miss Frizzle) was Lady Gaga, who went full-on performance art with her ensemble and dressed in David Bowie-inspired garb: 10 inch platforms, Ziggy Stardust hair and what can best be described as a long, sequined wizard-robe-blazer-gown. What you can’t see: her tattoo of the late rock legend that she recently had inked a few days ago.

Photographed by Jordan Strauss/Getty Images via Daily News

3. Off the meme carpet: Florence Welch wore Gucci and therefore wins everything.

Photographed by Jordan Strauss via Daily News

The Live Performances

Lady-Gaga-Grammys-2016-David-Bowie-Man-Repeller

Although Rihanna cancelled unexpectedly on account of bronchitis — part of a trend of last minute no-shows that also included Lauryn Hill and Nicki Minaj — the rest of the performers went strong. (The show must go on!)

Highlights include an acoustic set by Grammy newbie The Weeknd, a live-from-NY performance by the cast of Hamilton and, right after snagging best rap album, Kendrick Lamar’s powerful, politically-minded medley, performed in chains.

Also important: the beyond-happy, feel-good Lionel Richie homage, the way Adele handled on-stage audio issues with nothing but grace, Lady Gaga’s dazzling Bowie tribute performance and the soulful power vocals of rising star Andra Day alongside Ellie Goulding’s “Love Me Like You Do” and “Rise Up.” If you thought you loved these songs before, give this video a watch — things are about to get infinity times better.

LOLs Stevie-Wonder-Grammys-2016-Man-Repeller Stevie Wonder, most charming man on the planet, relished in that fact that the winning card he held for of Song of the Year (which was, FYI, Ed Sheeran’s “Thinking Out Loud”) was written in braille and therefore only he could read it.

The Surprises Beyonce-Grammys-2016-Man-Repeller After abject fear that it wouldn’t happen, Beyoncé made a grand entrance right before the end of the show in a sheer white dress. She didn’t perform but she’s probably like, guys, chill, I just did the Super Bowl. Kanye didn’t perform either but he did participate with frequent tweets throughout the show, mainly filled with 140 word plugs for Tidal. Word on the street is that Bey is exclusively releasing her new album there, too, so you may want to bring this up if the water cooler talk today turns to some some obscure on-camera reference you missed last night.

And if that doesn’t get the job done, just bring up the Yeezy presentation — works every time.

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  • Maxine Whitney

    Dont’t forget Taylor’s elegant jab at Kanye West in her acceptance speech! Lady Gaga was the perfect (and obvious?) choice for that tribute. Amazing as usual. Loved Man Repeller’s tweet about not being able to see Hamilton until 2018, feeling that pain today too!

  • https://britanniarules.wordpress.com/ britanniarules

    KENDRICK LAMAR! So good! Hands down the best of the night!

    UntelTed: that Gucci dress though! Nailin’ it!

  • http://www.werenotexclusive.com Cortne Morgan

    I want to write about Kendrick’s performance but I haven’t yet found the words. it was powerful and interesting to see how people responded to it (mostly outrage from non blacks, referring to it on my facebook as racist and inappropriate) I like to sit back and observe such strong responses to cultural performances. It says alot about the person protesting something non threatening; fear, intimidation…maybe confusion. ANYWAY, FW looked fab in Gucci.

    www . werenotexclusive . com

  • http://www.mgluxurynews.com María Geronico

    Music moves hearts, while fashion moves aspirations… I’d have rather watched the grammy’s, even though I work in fashion. The reality is that I’m from Europe and I couldn’t watch any!

    Discover at my latest post how to find the motivation to create a workout routine: Some effective tips, my favorite workout ritual, and the coolest training outfits.

    http://www.mgluxurynews.com/posts

    Bests!!

  • http://kristylin.com Kristy

    This is something that hadn’t paid attention to but has now become a burning question: Why are some Grammy nominations from music almost 2 years ago?

    Like, why wasn’t Taylor Swift’s 1989 nominated for the 2015 Grammy if it came out in 2014?
    Why wasn’t the song Glory nominated for the 2015 Grammy if it came out in 2014 was nominated for the 2015 Oscars and 2015 Golden Globes?

  • pamb

    Was there really fear that Beyonce wouldn’t show up? I didn’t hear it. She’s a professional.