Don’t Buy a Swimsuit Before Reading This

I have the best strategy

05.19.17

Is it just me, or did the weather suddenly turn from a confused toddler navigating the terrain of a seasonal change to a sassy teen rebelling against the concept of “transitioning” courtesy of a full-blown, 93-degree, armpit of a heat wave?

I’m actually one of those people who prefers being “too hot” over “too cold,” so my dubious reaction to this impromptu sauna is probably the result of spending two hours literally running — or rather, sprinting (my teammates were very competitive) — around New York City for Man Repeller’s first annual summer kick-off scavenger hunt, which was SO, SO FUN but also so, so sweaty. We wrapped up the hunt at Mr. Purple on the Lower East Side, which happens to have a glistening, perfectly aquamarine pool on its roof deck. I caught myself looking at the pool like a scurvy-riddled sailor might look at half a grapefruit. I would have given my left arm for a swimsuit. Okay, that’s dramatic. Maybe just a fingernail.

Anywho, the first thing I did when I got home was open my laptop and start looking at swimsuits online and adding them to my fantasy shopping cart. During my perusal, I discovered something rather tantalizing, which is that a bunch of perfectly wonderful suits from last season are currently on sale. On SALE! During peak swimwear shopping season! Forget rainbow toast; these are the real unicorns. I broke them down by category for your shopping pleasure, because it’s Mom Month and I’m a fun mom:

Regular bikinis

High-waist bikinis

One-pieces

Don’t forget to put sunblock behind your ears.

Collage by Maria Jia Ling Pitt.

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  • Robin @ And Then We Tried

    Searching for swim suits is always such a bummer! Great recommendations on sale swimsuits from last season!!

    We just did our own search of the perfect swim suit for curves: http://andthenwetried.com/2017/05/searching-for-a-one-piece-bathing-suit-for-curves/ Check it out!

  • dietcokehead

    FYI swimsuit shopping appears to have gotten EXPONENTIALLY EASIER for big-chested girls in the past year. You can find, like, H cup suits on Asos and Bare Necessities. Heaven. I can’t wear the cute designer stuff you guys show off, but I probably wouldn’t pay that anyway soooooo

  • Chloe

    Thank you so much for sharing this 🙂 The way you wrote was making me smile all the way through and I absolutely love your selection of swimwear, especially the yellow flowery one piece.

    Keep up the great work 🙂

    Chloe @ https://girllgonerogue.blogspot.co.uk/

  • Kiks

    My best piece of swimwear shopping advice if you are a tall person looking for a one-piece: look for something with adjustable straps, and size waaaaay up from what you wear in clothing.
    The extra fabric will just stretch up & down instead of sideways, and you’ll have a swimsuit that doesn’t give you a permanent wedgie!
    Trust me, it took several failed online purchases and setting aside my pride to try on size 14-16 swimsuits when I wear a size 8 dress. Best realization ever.

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    • Danielle Cardona Graff

      You are SO right! Nothing worse than front and back wedgie! #tallgirlproblems

    • Haley Nahman

      This is really smart!

  • Thanks u so much for sharing this informative post. After reading this post I will be careful when I shop swimsuit next time!
    http://www.brandmenow.co.uk/clothing/organics-clothing.html

  • Kay Nguyen

    I don’t own any one-piece swimsuit but there are so many cute designs and now I feel like it need one in my life! Love this blog <3

    https://www.myblackcloset.com/