9 Dads Weigh In On Vetements’ New X-Rated Jeans

They had a lot of opinions

04.13.17

The world of fashion is like a communal sauce pot. Designers are constantly adding spices and we, the consumers, have the privilege of dipping in our spoons and passing around tastes.

This week’s uncharted mouthful comes by way of Vetements:

#VETEMENTSxLEVIS @mytheresa.com @kevingiacco

A post shared by VETEMENTS (@vetements_official) on

Vetements recently made more jeans with Levi’s, and one of the styles comes replete with a butt-cheek display option. Or at least that’s what my tastebuds detected upon first slurp. This collab actually makes a lot of sense considering how Vetements’ Artistic Director Demna Gvasalia is “credited with fueling fashion’s love of directional denim” (I nabbed that quote from Net-a-Porter because I truly cannot improve upon the phrase “directional denim”) and the fact that Levi’s basically discovered denim in the first place — a classic rebel-meeting-its-maker situation, if you will.

Needless to say, the style pictured above elicited many a valid question:

  1. Is the butt flap purely for showcasing purposes or is there a practicality factor at stake (i.e. expedited trips to the bathroom)
  2. How soon will these sell out?
  3. What kind of underwear is recommended?
  4. When is the infant-sized rollout happening?
  5. Is Kim Kardashian planning a break-the-internet followup story?
  6. What will all the dads think???

Questions one to five are still TBD but the sixth deserved an immediate answer, so Team Man Repeller took one for THE Team (of humanity) and fired off urgent texts (plus Gchats) to the dads in our lives in search of fatherly feedback. Highlights include:

“I saw a girl wearing jeans this week that were SO distressed (do you use that word in fashion?)”

“Maybe it’s more practical for women to have the zipper in the back idk.”

“It would have to be a clean ass”

“That is tacky”

“Not on my daughter!”

“Wtf.”

“If you wore those I would not be happy.”

“I will ask Abie to not let you wear them outside your own home”

So yes, the reactions were opinionated, to say the least! But that’s what makes taste-testing so enjoyable, in my humble opinion. Who doesn’t love sampling?? It’s basically Whole Foods’ entire business model, which is why you will often find me roaming the aisles on a quiet Wednesday eve, trying to figure out how to best disguise myself so I can go back for round three of free chocolate-dipped dried banana without being escorted out, but I digress. My point is that trying new things is a fun and wild ride and, when it comes to style, sometimes we are confronted with an uncharted flavor we immediately find truly delicious like floral brooches or shoes decorated with fruit or khaki ponchos, while other times we mash our tongues into a bewildering new taste sensation that confounds us from the tips of our tonsils to the bottoms of our tummies — likeeeee jeans with a butt-exposing zipper, to name a totally random example. On the latter occasion, it’s always fun to pass a spoonful to your dad. Just keep a bucket nearby in case he spits.

Photo via Matches.com; collage by Maria Jia Ling Pitt.

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  • Mia

    Uncomfortable and ugly

  • These are wacky! Something we would have seen in the early 2000’s rather than now. But who knows, there’s always someone buying something these days!

    http://www.shessobright.com

  • Leilani

    surely they’re supposed to be worn zipped up? just reminds me of those acne jeans from a few years back

  • Imaiya Ravichandran

    weiiiird. until rihanna starts wearing them– in which case i’ll take three pairs, please and thank u.

  • I would be the one to wear them zipped up, with some raggedy old underwear underneath, then the zipper would snag on something and come open.

    And I would have no idea it happened. All day.

    I’m good with taking my chances on tearing the ass out of regular jeans, thanks!

  • Yvonne’s dad…the Woo Game ROFLMAO

  • Hannah

    Fucking gold.

    • Hannah

      The dads not the pants

  • Emily

    I loved Shari’s dad’s “Standby”. Such a dad comment. Amazing.

  • Hellbetty666

    Having these in jeans seems like a wasted opportunity. Get these zips in a jumpsuit and women everywhere will love you.

  • chouette

    I remember when Lip Service made these and they were called the Drive-Through jeans. I was probably 12 and really wanted them, then realized that was a messed up thing for a dorky 12 year old to want, and I should probably stop shopping on what was basically a fetishwear site. Now I’m 29 and if these weren’t more than my rent (by a LOT) I would be super into them.

  • “do you use that word in fashion?”

    • Harling Ross

      my fave too

  • queenisdead

    Vetements is a social experiment on how much money people will pay for ugly over-hyped clothes, right?

  • Yeah these aren’t my thing. More power to you if you wanna wear them though!

    – Natalie
    http://www.workovereasy.com

  • Rae

    There’s something so funny to me about “It would have to be a clean ass.” Yes, it would.