VIDEO: What Happens When Your Internet is Too Damn Fast
How many excuses do you think we were able to make up to use Leandra’s internet?
A brief history of using my friends in a series that I call Doorbell Excuses:
Summer of 1993: Scheduled playdates with a nearby neighbor for the sole purpose of using her Nintendo.
Summer of 1996: Developed a closer relationship with an acquaintance because she had a pool slide.
Every Wednesday after school in 5th and 6th grade: Did “homework” at a pal’s house where her mom let us watch TRL and eat junk food.
Every Friday after school in 8th grade: Sleepovers with one of the few girls I knew who had dial-up internet — and unlimited access to it.
In high school: Hitched a lot of car rides.
In college: Borrowed so many notes.
Post-graduate: Borrowed so many movie-and-TV-show-streaming passwords.
Most recently: I used Leandra for her web speed.
As I write this, Leandra is one of the first humans in New York City with Fios Instant Internet thanks to this very partnership. Our office doesn’t even have it yet, and guess what I do for a living? I work online. Lags, buffering, slow loading time — it doesn’t just make me want to scream, it DOES make me scream. Then I terrify everyone because I sound like an injured pterodactyl, and office morale goes down. It’s a mess. So anyway, Leandra recently got this super-fast internet which she then bragged to the team about while working from home, and let’s just say we suddenly had a million reasons to pop on by and say hey.
Can you blame us??
Click the video above to see what I mean. (Oh, and then tell me what your Doorbell Excuse would be.)
Film stills by Krista Anna Lewis.