How to Decide on Breakfast

Amelia Diamond | November 29, 2016

A visual guide to make this reallll easy for ya

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Decisions are so annoying sometimes. There are days where I would rather knock my shins into an inconveniently placed coffee table a million times than make one more decision. I really feel for Keanu Reeves in The Matrix because, after this long, hard reality check where he learns that nothing is as it is and computers control us all (or something, I forget the nuances of this movie) he’s pressured to make a choice between life-altering pills. If I were Keanu and Morpheus was bugging me, my immediate response would likely be, “Ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.”

All of which is to say that when it comes to waking up in the morning, I feel you if you don’t want to kick off the rooster’s crow with a damn decision about “what to eat.” So I made it easy for you. Follow this guide, let your feelings lead, and tell Morpheus to just Google it if he cares so much.

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For more fun guides to help with life’s annoying decisions: Should I go home? Do I like him? How do I get through this breakup?

Guide designed by Emily Zirimis.

  • Abby

    I eat the same thing every day: Siggi’s yogurt with sliced banana and a little granola. Easy, requires no thought, and is satisfying/filling. I wake up HANGRY so filling is my main criteria.

  • Taste of France

    You want protein and complex carbs in the morning so you don’t get a slump and hungry before lunch. The longer you can put off eating sugar the better.

  • Krista Anna Lewis

    I just ate two bagels with tofu cream cheese and am regretting not having had this before making the bagel thing my go to.

  • Andrea Raymer

    I just really love cereal!

    Also, Has anyone else considered that most desserts are just modified breakfast food? Cupcake=Muffin, Ice Cream=Smoothie, Cookies=Scones, Pie is just breakfast always.

    • Grace B

      god, i crave cereal. i consider the days i ate 1 – 3 bowls in a sitting (for breakfast or an anytime snack) pure innocent bliss. Ugh, then i learned about how bad they are for us…doesn’t that cancel out if they are organic?

  • Irene Laura
  • olivesgirl

    I eat half a cup (sometimes a bit more) of Fiber One (original version) with a 2% Faje plain yogurt. Sometimes I add a couple of blueberries. Add a drop of almond milk to make the whole mixture smoooooth and easy to eat – deliciosooo and no thought involved!!!!

  • Bella

    i love this article haha <3

  • Lyndsay

    bulletproof coffee for breakfast for life!

  • Adrianna

    I’ve shared photos of my giant, freshly cooked breakfast before (potatoes, eggs, chicken) so here’s the star of my breakfast sandwich:

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/b7bc7b8890b800fb0cdeb1273aea03c69cd562d3d81517bd05a59191ceed072a.jpg

    I swear by Mestemacher breads. I actually took the suggestion from Cameron Diaz on a random C-list celebrity Play It podcast. I figured I’d give it a try when I read that you have to refrigerate after opening. It’s vacuumed packed so I can store unopened breads for a while. I no longer purchase the soft sliced bread (that takes months to grow mold…)

    I actually feel very full after consuming this bread and no longer experience sugar highs and lows that I did with regular bread.

    • 808kate

      It’s so good!

  • Meredith

    Why would you cover this graphic with bacon but not actually give us bacon as a breakfast option? That’s just mean.

    • Meredith

      Oh. Now I see it’s in the hangover track. Well, I guess there’s one more reason to indulge.

  • Grace B

    If I made it myself: oatmeal with cinnamon and hemp seeds.

    If I probably went out: two amazing migas breakfast tacos w/ mild green salsa & a giant chai latte. or cold brew. or an egg burger. or a delicious crispy biscuit with an egg and sausage and cheese which I will then remove from the biscuit, eat normally, and then put jelly and butter on the biscuit, essentially having 2 meals.

    in high school I just ate nature valley bars. or pop tarts.

  • I just ate a croissant with avocado and cream cheese, that’s a normal thing for me…

  • Andy

    hands down breakfast is the best meal of the day!

  • Nicole Pinhas

    amelia, i love this so much and the illustration is SO CUTE! (going to read the rest, i’m already very intrigued by “should i go home?” lol) my sister just introduced me to pre-cooked bacon at trader joes (if you’re the bacon eating kind) which is such a lifesaver. you can heat it up in 30 seconds, and your entire apartment doesn’t smell like bacon!! i love bacon, and the smell + production of it all is a huge deterrent for me… full disclosure i’m on a high protein high fat “diet” right now, so this tj’s product (as always) has really come through xoxo

  • AND! If you want to know your sweater body type… we made a quiz for that. http://bit.ly/2gJVirk xx