My friends like wine and we do not like strangers. We do not like body shots or even the theoretical concept of them. I’ve never made out with someone I wasn’t at least friends with on Facebook. So yeah, spring break in Cancun seemed sufficiently terrifying.
But it was our senior year and someone found a deal on JetBlue. Off to Mexico we went, thesis reading packed in our straw totes. It turns out that nobody is too downtown for an all-day buffet, and after two days of trying to filter my photos to seem more Tulum than Cancun, I realized that I needed to give in, give up, accept that I was here — on a beach covered in pitchers of beer — and that I really liked it.
Here’s what I learned:
Do: bring a lot of disposable cameras. Disposable cameras = cooler photos, less damning evidence on Instagram, less risk of losing your phone and besides, you can’t filter fun.
Don’t: feel bad about not going out every night. Everyone else is tired, too.
Do: get off your lounge chair and walk around, otherwise you’ll feel like you’re stuck in a cage. That’s what the beach is for. That and taking group photos in the waves. Maybe swimming.
Tip: If your friend falls into a cactus on the way home, it’s best to wait until you’re in the fluorescent-lit bathroom to try to take the pricks out.
Do: talk about room arrangements and whether or not you’re all sharing one big wardrobe or sticking with what’s in your personal suitcases before you land.
Don’t: ditch. The point of going on spring break with your friends is to…go on spring break with your friends.
Tip: If someone hits you on the head with a volleyball because they’re too drunk to get it across the net, make them come get it themselves. You’re busy lounging, thanks.
Do: be your most embarrassing self because you will never see any of the people staying at the hotel ever again. It’s okay to take a hundred group selfies in the lobby and then be really mad when other people do the same thing.
Don’t: feel pressured to do anything for the sake of “SPRING BREAK!!!”
Do: you, even if that means eating free ice cream cones all night on the beach alone while your friends play bingo with people they just met in line for pasta.
The really great thing about a good old fashioned Spring Break is that the one and only point is to have fun. So have fun, whatever that means to you. Speaking of: bring some kind of a detangling spray. Your hair is going to be out of control.