The Thought Process of Leaving an Old Job and Starting a New One

Harling Ross | March 11, 2016

“What the hell am I doing?”

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I read over the draft of my email for the fifteenth time.

Am I really about to send in my acceptance for a brand new job offer? Despite the fact that I’m only JUST starting to feel settled at my current job?

More importantly, should I sign the email “Best” or “All the best”????

Anxiety jumps around inside my stomach like that annoying little kid at the birthday party who won’t get out of the bouncy castle, even when it’s time for cake.

I’m definitely not a fan of change. That’s why I eat the same thing for breakfast every day. It’s called consistency, and it’s sexier than Ryan Reynold’s left glute.

But progress is impossible without change, right? I think George Bernard Shaw said that. Or maybe a Snapple cap.

I take a deep breath and press “send” on the email, relinquishing the future of my career to cyberspace.

I feel an immediate sense of relief. Like bathing in a sweet, sweet river of Tylenol PM. I’m doing the right thing. This is exactly what I want for my career.

I shoot off a quick Snapchat to some friends: “Accepted the job!!!!! [dancing girl emoji] [fire emoji] [grinning emoji]”

Look out, world. I’m leaning the fuq in.

***

I give my two weeks notice the next day. Contrary to what I expect, no one cries or gets mad at me. Why? Because it’s a professional workplace, not the set of a David O. Russell film.

My armpits are uncomfortably moist. Yes, moist. I go to Duane Reade to buy deodorant. And pretzel M&Ms.

***

They say time flies when you’re having fun, but time also flies when you only have 14 days to wrap up loose ends, transition your entire workload, purge your laptop of personal files, conduct an exit interview, answer emails and explain why you’re leaving to every coworker you end up washing your hands next to in the bathroom.

***

Finally, my first day at the new job. I arrive half an hour early to grab a bite to eat at a nearby Pret a Manger, because it’s still way too soon for my new colleagues to find out what it sounds like when I chew. That can wait until lunch. Unless I get fired  before then!

***

I arrive at the office a few minutes before the designated time. (That’s how you convey “World’s Best Employee” vibes without writing it on a mug).

The next 8 hours are a blur of information. I feel more incompetent than I did that one time I tried to contour my cheekbones. It’s exciting but also terrifying and my heart is acting like someone injected it with espresso.

By the end of the day, all I want to do is take off my clothes and call my mom and take a shower and eat a cookie and fall asleep to the lullaby of Rory Gilmore’s voice. Ya know? But as I close my laptop and start packing up my bag, it occurs to me with the ding! of a mental Hallmark card that I should probably take a moment to appreciate the fact that I did it.

And that’s when a little bit of air escapes from the bouncy castle.

Collage by Emily Zirimis featuring Céline earrings and Fendi sunglasses.

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  • pamplemousseismyjam

    really really enjoyed this!

  • Pamela

    Those transitioning moments in life are really really scary, but I find that they just keep us moving forward. Congratulations!!

    • Lois Hall

      I am getting a salary of 5700 dollars each week…dg Over a year ago I was in a horrible condition , jobless and no bank credit . Thanks to one of my friends who showed me a way where I was able to gather myself and making average of 56 d/h. So it can change your life as it has changed mine.

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  • giftofthefab

    So relatable – especially that total body sigh of relief knowing that you made the right choice to quit. Congratulations on the new job!

  • http://www.stylishdisaster.com Liz

    best feeling in the world. I’m taking a ‘professional pause’ for the next several months to do something completely different (teach English in Colombia!) but once I come back, it’ll be the sweaty-armpit, anxiety-laden process of job hunting and (hopefully) acceptance. great piece!

    http://www.stylishdisaster.com

  • Thefullcolorlife

    Nice! I just did a blog talking about this. It must be that time of year to feel restless.

  • Leah

    This is perfectly timed as I just accepted a new job offer too. I went from nervous wreck to complete elation and now I’ve gone back to nervousness. But change is scary, there’s nothing to do but face it and grow!

  • Sujie Kim

    seriously, gilmore girls is the best cure for the “oh my god, I have no idea what I just did all day, but I think it was work” feeling. which is why i am on season 6.

    • Harling Ross

      Agreed. I have watched each episode approximately 1928304 times.

  • http://www.roarintwenties.com/ Aleda Johnson | RoarinTwenties

    That fear of change is where I’m at right now. I’m just dipping my toes in because I’m too chicken to take the plunge!

    Anyone got a towel?

    • Jessica Fansler

      When I saw the draft of 5845 dollars,,,fe I accept that my friend’s brother was like really generating cash in his free time with his PC. . His aunt’s neighbor has done this for only 11 months and by now repaid the loan on their home and bought a new Car .

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  • Kelly

    “By the end of the day, all I want to do is take off my clothes and call my mom and take a shower and eat a cookie and fall asleep to the lullaby of Rory Gilmore’s voice. Ya know?”
    I TOTALLY know girl. This sentence is A+ and I feel you 100%.

    • Harling Ross

      It’s pretty much a universal recipe for happiness and mental clarity

  • Jamie

    Just gave my two weeks notice and in full-on panic mode about the new job I took (in a totally different industry, with way more responsibility). I can TOTALLY relate to this.