19 Questions About ‘Girls’: Season 5, Episode 3

Mattie Kahn | March 7, 2016

Answer and then add your own, because, ?!?!????

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Like a very cute!!! Japanese alarm clock, I tuned in just in time to watch Girls last night. It was great.

First, I need more Lucy Liu in my universe.

Second, this show is never better than when it gives Hannah and Shosh and Marnie and Jessa permission to be the truest versions of themselves — 90 percent superficial and snark-ridden, 10 percent real and ambivalent about what the world is willing to offer a bunch of twentysomething-year-old women. It seems like less and less all the time. But let’s keep our fingers crossed, okay? Maybe it’ll all work out? That, and 19 more questions I have about this episode:

1. Are we supposed to think Fran is walking the moral high ground in this situation?

2. Real Q: What does feminist porn look like?

3. Is there either some combination of products and/or a spell I can cast to transform my eyebrows into Shosh’s eyebrows?

4. How many soul patches/goatees will Girls be able to fit into a six-season run? So far, they’re already racking up impressive numbers.

5. Wouldn’t we all be happier in our love lives if we could get cotton candy all year round?

6. Who here feels personally victimized by the way Marnie pronounces “Ecuador”?
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7. What can I do to have Aidy Bryant deliver all bad news?

8. If you’re Hannah and you peddle your problems around to enough people, do you think you eventually get the answer you want?

9. Are barrettes the new braids? Again?

10. Can we hereby reclassify all unwanted bulges as “interesting fat deposits”?

11. When Hannah tried a juicy-secret smile, who else could only picture Chandler Bing? Just me? Totally. Awesome. Yes.
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12. Is there either some combination of products and/or a spell I can cast to transform my ponytail into Lucy Liu’s ponytail?

13. Between goofy-nudes Fran and “I’ll-take-care-of-you” Scott, is this some epidemic of problematic feminist boyfriends in Girlsland? Are all quote-unquote feminist boyfriends sort of dickheads?

14. Are you really not doing this “will-they-won’t-they” shit, Jessa? Rhetorical! You are!

15. The next time you’re out, will you pretty please do the “Adam” instead of the Dougie? Will you submit video evidence?

16. Hot candle wax??!!?!?!?!?!

17. Let’s have at it: On a scale of one to Avada Kedavra, how unforgivable is it that Hannah deleted those photos?

18. Couldn’t Shosh have sent poor Scott a text? Maybe a sad voice note?

19. How much time did Scott spend making that poster?

Follow Girls whiz and author Mattie on Twitter @mattiekahn. Photograph via Craig Blankenhorn/HBO collaged by Emily Zirimis.

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  • Aydan

    ARGHRHGHRHGH this is how I feel about some of the characters behavior in girls last night!! MARNIE ENOUGH!! I too felt victimized by her pronunciation. Hannah never ceases to amaze me in doing typical “annoying GF stuff”, like ugh I would never want to date anyone (regardless of gender) who did stuff like that. (The whole phone privacy thing is actually huge in the general conversation right now RE the shooters’ phones in the San Bernardino shootings — so this actually quite timely albeit on a slightly different level). I love Shosh and I want that alarm clock!!

    • Meg

      It’s so annoying, but there’s also the kind of accidentally seeing it. I’d never go through someone’s phone, but I have been handed someone’s phone to look at something, then a text you wish you’d never seen pops up. Then world shattered. Then ugh.

  • Elizabeth Tamkin

    My #1 question is: is Shosh’s alarm clock a real thing in the world? And then also lol to Adam “winning” as an actor while he was Kylo Ren IRL.

  • Natasha Sekretareva

    I’m so at “You know how people say you can’t run away from your problems? Well, I moved away from mine and it worked” stage. Season 5 Shosh is the inspiration!

    • Yvonne Dunlevie

      Agree! Season 5 Shosh is an *inspiration*

    • Amelia Diamond

      Wait is this you? Your hair is amazing.

      • Natasha Sekretareva

        yes, its me. thanks, I couldn’t resist the temptation of trying to pull the Japanese Shosh look after watching the last episode

    • Shanda

      I totally agree, she is an inspiration – BUT she could have at LEAST told Scott she wouldn’t be at the airport!

  • http://tootsplusdill.blogspot.com Melanie@Toots + Dill

    I don’t know how to even wrap my head around where Girls is this season. I’ve always been able to be like “Yup!” “I’ve had that happen” “You go girl!” or “Okay I think finally someone reacted right” reactions but now I’m all over the place.

    I can say that I loved how they really showed Shosh away from the others and how happy she was. It was fun to see her as her own person not spazzily ranting near meltdown. I do think too she could have texted Scott because seriously that was cold. He is a good guy and that was mean.

  • Fran Lo Presti
    • Fran Lo Presti

      that’s a link for the alarm clock

      • Kat

        Bless you

    • Cherryblossomgirl08

      i bought mine but concern: no english-language directions exist, apparently. praying someone posts a youtube how-to soon.

  • mollie blackwood

    My first question was “Where can I get that alarm clock?” It has been answered, thank you fellow commenter. Second was why did Yoshi looked pissed off at Shosh that whole time they were out together. I couldn’t tell if he was mad at her or what. I was also confused on why Shosh wasn’t picking up on that weird vibe too.

    • Cherryblossomgirl08

      I think he preferred a more “innocent” Shosh and wasn’t really happy with the fact that their male co-workers were basically making fun of her.

    • M. A.

      he was looking at her like “this is wrong”, because he thought she was being preyed upon. his brows were furrowed with concern at how his idiot friends were impressing upon the person that he has a crush on.

  • prairie_dogs

    Wasn’t Jessa going to become a therapist? I think I’d rather watch that plot line than the Adam thing. Ps I love this recap feature 👍👍

  • picarica

    LUV LUV LUV the name of the fetish club, though. Any other character, continuity, plotline sins FORGIVEN just for that.

  • http://www.stylishdisaster.com Liz

    Shosh’s Japan apartment is where I want to live. The colors! The alarm clock! That weird capsule shower that looks like it’s from the movie The Fly! The nurse costume/BDSM club scene was just weird, but loved the episode. And yeah, Fran keeping nude pics of exes is not okay. Hannah: “What I lack in skill, I more than make up for in curiosity!” Died.

    Liz
    http://www.stylishdisaster.com

  • Maria

    HOW DO I GET SHOSH’S HAIR

  • Aggie

    More Lucy Liu–> Go watch old episodes of Ally McBeal (can’t remember which season) it’s sooo worth it!
    Hannah is so frustrating, I can’t take it. Not okay for Fran to keep those pictures but also not okay for her to delete them, the trust will be gone on both sides, the relationship will be over soon. Plus, why is it okay for her to kiss Elijah so intensely IN FRONT of her current boyfriend?! 1. I don’t care if he’s gay or not 2. When was that ever a thing before in the series, did I miss something?
    This mid-room shower capsule looks amazing and would forever solve my problems of being paranoid when I hear a suspicious noise in my house and don’t think I can fight the intruder because I am naked and stranded in my bathroom.

  • Mariana

    Japan is like Shoshanaland, I can’t even imagine her in nyc anymore. Go Shoshana!

  • Latest Obsessions

    I loved this past episode, the character nuances are never lost. I too noticed Marnie’s pronuciation of Ecudaor and smilespread across my face, because I have a friend who went to Ibiza, and now pronounces it Eivissa, which granted is the right way but it’s just so corny. I love watching girls and seeing the annoying and honest traits and quirks of each character. Ps. Yes to Adam and Jessa, They are on the will-they end of the will-they-won’t-they plotline.

  • http://www.latestobsessions.com/ Ivy Nkatha

    I too noticed Marnie’s pronunciation of Ecudaor and a smile spread across my face, because I have a friend who recently went to Ibiza, and now pronounces it Eivissa, which granted is the right way but it’s just so corny. Ps. Yes to Adam and Jessa, They are on the will-they end of the will-they-won’t-they plotline, no?

    http://www.latestobsessions.com/

  • gisele2015

    I am from Brazil and I would never notice the way Marnie said Ecuador if it were not by the comments here. Though we speak Portuguese here, those things can only be perceived by a native English speaker.

  • Ché Hot Chocolate

    Valid questions. I’m going to start describing ALL my bulges as interesting fat deposits.

  • Penny Grigio

    are we allowed to talk about the significant depreciation in quality that this show has been experiencing? i think the honeymoon stage of season one Girls might be ending for me