How to Cope With the End of Summer

We’ll get through this together, promise.

09.08.15
man-repeller-end-of-summer-coping-pill-bottle

Welcome to anti-anxiety month on Man Repeller. September is a weird 30-day stretch. Yes, sure, the end of summer stings worse than any sunburn that’s crisped your nips, but that is primarily because all the anxiety you feel comfortable relegating to the backburner during the blur that is June through August bubbles back up to the surface faster that you can ask these existential questions: What is sand? What is ocean? You begin back-stalking your own Instagram in an effort marked by vanity to recreate the past. But like going through pictures of you and your ex boy band after a breakup, this only makes matters worse.

And frankly speaking, you don’t have to suffer. You will get through this time period. For proof, look no further than the following reasonings: 1) You have done it for as many years as you’ve been alive and you’re always eventually fine. 2) We will do it together. 3) The below guide will serve as a starting point that unites us like additional members of the Wu-Tang Clan. And finally, anxiety — or the absence of it — is nothing more, nothing less than a state of mind of which you maintain complete and utter control. So kick that a-hole to the curb and consider the following, would you?

1. Keep wearing your swimsuits as bodysuits, bras, sheer-skirt underpinnings, etc.

2. Wear goggles as sunglasses.

3. Keep your sandals on your feet until your toenails are literally so cold they start to chip away at themselves.

4. Then at that point, extend again by adding socks. Bonus: sandals are on sale. Added bonus: socks tend to be cheap.

5. Do not — and this one is important — do not stop drinking rosé wine.

6. Do also consider the importance of maintaining an appetite for Mexican food (fish tacos!) and frozen margaritas. Drink enough and you’ll practically forget you’re not sitting on a deck overlooking the ocean in a calm, serene state.

7. Remember that people go running naked in San Francisco, so you can do that too.

8. But don’t forget — for a single moment — that fall dressing absolutely RULES. Think about the sweater possibilities! The layers! The outfits that don’t require big ass coats to destroy the creative vision!

9. Plan activities for as many weekends as possible into October so that you continually have things to look forward to, which staves off that feeling of Nothing Fun Will Ever Happen Again.

10. Don’t even ask your friends about the above. Just make plans, grab strangers to join.

11. Ask Stacy London to join.

12. Say cowabunga, like, 2x daily.

13. Pretend Labor Day is the New New New Year (sorry Memorial Day)

14. Guys, blazers!!!!!!!!

15. Do not stop drinking iced coffee. Do not stop for as long as your teeth and hands can handle, and they can definitely handle through November, at least.

16. That said, begin celebrating the return of Pumpkin Spiced Season.*

*Addendum: Petition for National Pumpkin Spiced Season to be added to the official calendar of Random Ass Holidays

17. DIY your own beach and invite people over to your private island.

18. Remember that beach bags are excellent for carrying fall produce.

19. Go to Ikea for back to school shopping, then annoy your friend Donna, like this guy.

20. Or, pull a Justin Bieber and let it out. Crying is cathartic, and the salty tears will make you feel like you’re near the ocean. Or like you are an ocean.

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Until next year, sweet summer. Next up? Fashion week!

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  • No. 21 – trawl through Pinterest for cozy knits. Thats what I am going to do for sure.

    http://www.fashionandfrappes.com

    • Amelia Diamond

      oooooo me too

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  • This is amazing

  • September has always been that awkward season when you question “What in the world should I wear today?” every single day for 30 days. Also, New York Fashion Week is coming up soon, so you’d definitely ask THAT question at least twice a day. Or maybe thrice.

    http://keslywinona.blogspot.jp/

  • Samantha H

    not. ready.

  • barb

    LOL I think I love you.

  • I love this list. You’ll be happy to know that I wore a bathing suit as a shirt to class the other day but had to bring a sweater(!!) because A/C. AND I found the perfect eileen fisher coat the other day at buffalo exchange. I am SO EXCITED FOR FALL/WINTER U GUYS

  • Luarnaiz

    That video is the best thing that ever happen to Tuesday mornings.

  • I’m right there with you.. fall dressing does totally rock. I will miss fish tacos and margs on the patio though.

    Josh | The Kentucky Gent
    http://thekentuckygent.com

    • Amelia Diamond

      i want margs and fish tacos RIGHT THIS SECOND

  • dustUP

    We had no summer this summer. I wore open shoes 5 times in total.

    • Amelia Diamond

      wear them now!

  • Thank you so much for this, especially that video! Can’t believe I haven’t seen it before!

  • The first thing I noticed Labor Day morning (at around 8am) that my local Starbucks already added autumn stickers to their doors. (“Warmly, Fall”) Were they predicting a 95 degree day yesterday?

    I realized that I’m not sad that the summer is over (ie summer activities) but that winter is about to sneak up on us. I’m so sick of NYC winters! I’d like to walk down the street to the gym without feeling pain through my underarmour

  • Caroline

    Have already started working on 9 and 10, have lots of week-ends planned (and no one to join so far, but who cares?).

  • this is awesome
    malinda
    http://www.malindaknowles.net

  • orianna

    i wear swimwear all year hahaha i dont have that kind of trouble!! visite http://www.maisonzancanaro.com 🙂