Office Apropos, Summer 2014
Three girls, five days, and fifteen outfits that transition from summer humidity to office freezer burn, kind of.
Leandra: Monday could have been significantly worse had I not superseded my plebeian bra for a bikini top. This is something I have recently started doing to soften the blow that is Dooms Day otherwise known as a summer start to the week. It makes me feel tropical and like I am a boat that vaguely resembles an office space and when it is worn under overalls, I like to pun and say that I feel “tropicool.” Cut to credits.
Amelia: Remember when I said I had a Kidchella-themed birthday party and to never tempt me with a peasant blouse and a good time? Exactly. See exhibit Monday in my high-waisted jorts by AYR and a floofy “boho” top that is not very “me” but when I saw it, I said “yes.” Actually I saw it Instagram and copied my friend wearing it, if you need to know my life.
Shoes slipping off my feet are from ASOS.
Charlotte: My hands are firmly planted in my pockets to keep me from face-planting into the street. Not only is it Monday, but also I’m fresh off a red eye and deliriously got dressed in an airplane bathroom. That vintage FFA jacket, which I have more or less permanently stolen from my roommate, is fun because it seems to attract all sorts of strangers who want to engage in conversation surrounding sustainable farming.
Leandra: Sometimes when I wake up in the morning I ask myself how I can look like the most dramatic version of your run-of-the-mill soccer mom and without fail, every single time, these Steven Alan green shorts are the glue that tether me to the minivan. Today, I overcompensated using a white Jenni Kayne blouse that exposes my nipples with even just the slightest arm jerk and a pair of Valentino mid-heels that force the remark: if these don’t remind you of dancing with the stars, I give up. Oh! Also! This first half of the week was wrist-scarf themed.
Amelia: Almost went with the fauxga pants and sports bra (sans gym) situation this AM, but then the Shower Song came on and I was inspired to get dressed like a real human. The sarong I’m wearing was an impulse buy from Club Monaco — sort of the sartorial equivalent of buying everyone at the bar a round of shots — and the Vince tank under it is long enough to eliminate the whole I-can-see-your-butt thing. Oh my shoes? These are just my H&M mandals that I haven’t taken off once this summer. Not even to sleep.
Charlotte: No Pants Tuesday! Kidding, I am wearing some denim cutoff underwear and showing off my California tan. This whole getup is vintage save for the Kork-Ease shoes and Vint & York spectacles. Later this look took a 180 when I got nearly drowned in a 2-minute torrential downpour. Strangers on the train parted ways for me as I wrung out my shirt/dress leaving massive pools of water, and one dude even exclaimed, “What on earth happened to you?” Outfit success!
Leandra: To shave my legs or to wear pants? To shave my legs or to wear pants? I have an idea! Don’t put a razor to the legs, do wear pants, and then continue to abstain from shaving until the hair is long enough to make a statement through non-pants! Wednesdays are so cool.
Amelia: Wednesday is uniform day — I typically wear some version of this. It is also a day whereupon I asked everyone in the office if I looked like I was in a preppy version of the cult from The Leftovers. No one watches that show except for my roommate and so no one said yes…but they didn’t say no either.
Charlotte: Thumbs up for hump day! I’ve concluded that my top half wants to attend a doll tea party and my bottom half wants to be shredding on my skateboard I still don’t know how to ride. Oh the duality!
Leandra: If I’m being really honest with myself and a tenet I put forward at the beginning of the summer, it’s not technically a week until I’ve worn at least one pair of culottes. Where Rosie’s green ones fail me (as in, tango with a dry cleaner named Putnam), Tome’s pink taffeta do this cool thing to my legs that make me look like I am a. floating, b. really short, c. about to open a car of whoop-ass on your kitten’s litter box. Also, this is the tank top dreams are made of. Trust.
Amelia: I bought this stupid Zara skirt at the start of summer when I was drunk or in a day coma I guess, because I never wear skirts like this. I have worn it once. So, today I felt determined to finally make it worth the 30 hard earned bucks and take it from day 2 nite. This was obviously the day portion of the event; I went with my trusty Saint James top that might as well be my 5th appendage, ASOS flat-footers and green reflective sunglasses by Vint & York to make the skirt a little less girly. (If you need to know, I had a Tibi top underneath and switched into heels for a little summer shindig later on in the evening.)
Charlotte: It appears I woke up with an acute case of decade confusion. Once I slipped on those bell bottoms it only felt right to add that breezy off-the-shoulder peasant top and belt, both of which belonged to my mom in the 70s. Then came the platforms and the wacky glasses and before I knew it I was debatably wearing a costume.
Leandra: Turnt up for Friday! Here’s an ankle length black dress that does such a cool thing at the top where it reverses its indigenous silk to shine and shimmer like hair in a Garnier commercial in – drum roll please — midnight blue. I’m wearing it with white sneakers because I am normcore and think the look perfectly encapsulates the day, which is trying to say: fuq da Hamptons (jk! Love you! See you at sundown!).
Amelia: Your guess is as good as mine as to why I thought today was the day for a heel. Technically speaking my thinking was: ok, I’m going away this weekend and leaving right after work, and heels make my bag heavy, so if I wear the heels and pack the flops I’ll be able to run faster to the train since I’m always making it by the skin of my Chicklets. Which doesn’t make sense because running in heels isn’t my idea of a party, but know what is? These shorts from AYR (can you tell I’m into this brand?) with a Zara top that does this fun thing where the buttons unbutton and I flash everyone all day long. This (old) H&M clutch covered in jungle print that also makes for an excellent neck pillow on the train I am about to miss. Bye!
Charlotte: Nothing says “I’m ready for the weekend” quite like a halter festooned with flaming cacti. It may appear to be a dress but then a breeze whips by and poof! Magic shorts with hidden pockets! I love this freaky romper, but the impatient folks in the bathroom line behind me sure don’t. While undressing completely to pee is a bitch, it’s a small price to pay for all the people who are like,”WOAH! Cactus rocketships?!!”