How to Pack for Labor Day Weekend on Your Person
Who needs a suitcase when you’ve got a rack of bones?
There are only two variables that contribute to my vehement disdain for long distance traveling. First, I am deeply irrational, hugely narcissistic but desperately empathetic, and as a result of these three character traits I am also paralyzingly afraid of anything going not-as-planned while in transit. Second to this, I hate packing. The thought of a mobile, micro closet sits really poorly with me — chiefly because I don’t have a steamer, and when things get wrinkled they make like Rihanna and go bad forever.
It should then come as no surprise that when the establishment of The Quick Summer Getaway rears its head in May and little travel bags get packed all across the country on a near weekly basis until the 24th hour in August, I recoil. The constant loading and unloading, outfit planning and squandering and further coming to learn that my favorite [insert linen garment here] has been obliterated presents a load of emotional turmoil that only those frivolous enough to use summer as a verb can truly get behind.
But there is a solution! And though I’m discontented that it has taken me until the last days of Weekends-Away-Season to come to this conclusion, I am glad I’ve come to it at all. I call it: how to pack for Labor Day Weekend without using anything but the body your parents gave you on day 1 of your life, amen.
Figure you’re going to, say, Montauk, right? What do you really need? A sarong (item #1) for the beach? Maybe a button up (item #2) that could both serve as formal wear and your alternative beach look? Add a pair of denim cut offs (item #3) so that when night falls, you have them for your shirt. Wear clogs (item #4) — or your favorite summer heels — on your way out. Tie a pair of sneakers (item #5) around your shoulder. You can pack your wallet and phone and keys and a razor and toothbrush (items 6, 7, 8, 9 and 10, should you so please) into the sneakers, which will look great whilst Donald-ducking in a shirt sans shorts when you arrive at Ditch Plains.
Take a headscarf (item #11) for your head, or for your wrist (or ankle, or neck!) and wear a bathing suit (item #12). What’s that, you say? You need underwear? LOL!
Did you even know your body was as resourceful a suitcase as it is? Humans, man.
Hermes headscarf, Lem Lem sarong, Steven Alan shirt, Levi’s shorts, Rochas clogs, Missoni bathing suit Adidas sneakers, Armani sunglasses and for good measure and The Late August Chill, a blazer, by Atea.