When Nouns Become Verbs: Foodies Who Brunch

by Esther Levy
June 30, 2014
READ NEXT

Are you in it for the food or the social experience?

SATC-brunch

Do you spend your time scrolling incessantly through Yelp reviews and pictures, cursing Kathy P. and Bryan Simpson from Bushwick, as in, Brooklyn New York, for commenting on the palatability of a grass-fed lamb burger topped with harrissa mayo, pickled onions, gruyere cheese and finished off with a fried egg, but not uploading a complimenting photo of it?

Have you become detached from Saturday night’s company, instead turning attention to your Sunday Funday’s Main Brunch BitcheZ, subtitle: bring on the chorizo and chia benedict’s Groupme chat?

Do you call sandwiches sammies and take your mimosas only one way: bottomless?

Do you have a Likeness account?

How many wide brimmed fedoras do you own?

Have you used the hashtag #eeeeats in the last five minutes?

If you’ve answered “yes” to at least half of one of these questions than you’re probably a Bruncher. Every Sunday, at approximately 11 am, you and your friends — I may or may not be projecting — attend the most recent brunch location opening for a two hour spectacle bearing the promise of long wait times, OJ-filled champagne flutes and locally sourced eggs. Do you not?

A recent Time Magazine article found that, “Millennials spend more time planning brunch than they do looking for a date.” Evidently, we’d rather bide our time poring over menus in pursuit of the new cronut, duffin (you know, a duffle bag filled with muffins) or waffogato than find suitable mates with which to enjoy any of the aforementioned.

And unless you live beneath a rock — and are still scrambling your eggs as opposed to baking them into a herbed frittata — you’ve noticed that Brunch has transgressed from awkward meal time to brazen phenomenon, susceptible to the gaze of FOMO.

The breakfast-lunch portmanteau has become a sacred ritual. Various restaurants offer different calibers of brunch. There are those that are all-you-can-eat. Or savory and sweet. Some are reservation friendly while others beg the question: should I be wearing my sunglasses in here? Is the house Bloody Mary strong enough to cure last night’s hangover but subtle enough to spare one tomorrow? And, of course, is the food Instagram worthy? Because #picoritdidnthappen.

I like brunch. I like stuffing my face with an amalgam of flavors and textures, but the overemphasis on the newly minted past-time has rendered it a satirical joke ripe for College Humor picking. As Leandra pointed out, brunch has become the fashion girl’s equivalent of fashion week, leaving the uninvited and uninformed straggling outside (or by the nearest Hallal truck). Lucky for fervent Yelp contributors, brunch occurs not just twice annually — every Sunday is fair game and leaves restaurants scrambling (yes) to keep their menus fresh and consumers eager.

It’s just, are we in it for the food or for the photos? Is brunch just simply an institution to keep friends connected on the one hand or assholes alienating others on the flip side? If we’re innocuously in it for the photo, is that really a bad thing? And for the love of matcha, what are you doing next Sunday?

Image via HBO

Visit Esther’s blog, The Philosophy of Windex here and follow her ass on Instagram here.

REPLIES
  • http://www.itscarmen.com ≈ CARMEN ≈

    The only one I relate to is bottomless mimosas. This is a must. :] // itsCarmen.com ☼

  • Maria

    This was some fun reading! You, E. Levy, made some good points. I really do not hope people eat brunch at Sundays just for the picture’s sake. If so, it would be all because of some sort of status or in an expectation of how people want others to think about them, instead of actually enjoy the brunch for what it is worth.

    I do not know what I am up to this Sunday yet, but I usually do not eat brunch at Sundays -so maybe I should give it a try?

  • ee_by_cc

    I personally love brunch aftermath. Which, for me, consists of going shopping drunk off of the bottomless mimosa special and picking out tons of things at Topshop that my friends agree look AWESOME on me. Then, waking up the next day in a pile of bags and cursing myself that I bought 5 tutu-looking somethings in different colors and now have to go return them.

    http://www.enduringethereal.com

  • Ray, L

    Ahhh Brunch, where to eat it? How Long is the Wait? Hows the Crowd? Can we get a drink whilst we wait for that table to figure out everyones share of the check? If you’ve asked these ?’s over the past year then congrats your a winner in the “thank God I wasn’t born in Sub Saharan Africa Lottery”
    Not to worry No need to feel guilty I enjoy Brunch as much as the next Hipster. Especially reading Manrepeller and This writer…..

  • yvonne

    great postnothing like stalking menu pages and planning your order prior to arrival

    • Jenns10

      the best meal of the day – plus can’t forget open table reservation points

  • ImNotWaitingAnHour

    Brunch as defined should only be for those who because they partied too hard the Night before and woke up to late for Breakfast, and need Carbs and coffee to Mitigate those 3 too many Tequila’s at Bagatelle,
    I wouldn’t look down my nose at a Friendly’s or I hop or even a hojo, they might not be Hipster- Dipster approved but they definitely get the Job Done….

  • ilze

    Esther, I like to read what you have to say! keep it up

  • http://www.willwritefordessert.wordpress.com WWFD

    One Friday night, after an offhand and thoroughly sober one-line decision to grab brunch the next morning, a visiting friend and I somehow later managed to make it very clear to the entire bar we’d settled in at that night that we were, indeed, doing “BRUNCH TOMORROW!” I received no less than five text messages the next day practically demanding a verdict on the brunch. I had left my phone at home and it was delicious.

  • Kelly Williams

    i really need a pannenkoeken. I hate using the oven in summer (or my gas might be off). Can anyone help? I’m in Brooklyn, but will travel.

    Thanks ;)

    kelly@loganhollanddesign.com

    picture: http://www.pinterest.com/loganholland1/brunch/

  • B

    It cannot be a coincidence that I was listening to a song entitled “Doses & Mimosas” while reading this.

  • xoTDR.tumblr.com

    Such a funny read! and I think Brunching is a bit of both, both for the food and the social experience. As a teen who’s grown up watching Sex and The City, I couldn’t wait to get a little older so I could brunch with my friends in the city and dish the dirt about all the antics of the night before… not that, that actually happens much now, LOL. But for me brunching is more than an excuse to instagram, it’s kind of like another thing that tells me I’m becoming a more mature, “refined” woman! Haha

  • Kandeel

    I talk to my Sunday Funday’s Main Brunch BitcheZ, but I now am in dire need of a Likeness account. I yelp and I’m more of a bottomless coffee person. My hashtags consist of #brunchventures #waffles4lyfe #WAFFLES #brunchin

  • lavieenliz

    such a fun read!! really enjoyed this!

    http://hashtagliz.com

  • Guest

    I talk to my Sunday Funday’s Main Brunch BitcheZ, and have just downloaded the Likeness app. I yelp and im more of a bottomless coffee drinker. ¯_(ツ)_/¯

  • http://www.yourdoseofcoffee.com lulu

    I truly love your posts <3

  • Tracy

    I have so much fun while reading this post! I usually skip brunch!

    http://fashion-soup.com/

  • EtralaLondon

    hahahaa great post! yes, definitely we at Etrala.London are Brunchers :-)

    GOOD NEWS! SAMPLE SALE AT ETRALA.LONDON FROM 30% OFF + FREE UK DELIVERY… DON’T MISS IT OUT!!

    http://www.etrala.london/online-shop/4577184027

    BEST XX
    FROM LONDON

  • Dominique

    love this post

    xxxx

    http://www.dominiquecandido.com

  • http://kissandmakeupsbeautyblog.com/ Kiss & Make-up

    Actually, I can count the times that I’ve had brunch on one hand. And I am SO in it for the food, lol.

  • Sylvia

    Great post Esther! Brunch has become more of the weekend “main event” with d.j’s and table dancing! And often a fun brunch could last well past the early bird dinner hour!

  • http://Chicagoings.com Kari (Chicagoings)

    Great question: Brunch. Are we in it for the food or the selfies? Love this post! After attending an epic Everyday People brunch last Sunday and reading this, I was inspired to answer the question like only a Chicagoan can. —->
    Check it out! http://chicagoings.com/brunch-in-chicago/

  • http://www.solesatisfactionblog.com/ Kate

    While I always loved going out for a good Sunday brunch, after being in Germany for four and a half years (where all stores are closed on Sundays), I rather relish in the idea of taking whole ‘day of rest’ thing to heart and staying in for brunch. Lounging in PJs, whipping up some waffles or egg sandwiches and relaxing beats out scouring for a place with a free table amongst the masses of dining hipsters. Plus, finding a place in Berlin that’s brunch even comes close to what the US can offer is rare (it’s a burgeoning scene, but still has a ways to go), and since I’m most definitely in it for the food, I’ll take a meal I prepare myself, which I know will be great. Mimosas or not.

  • sogand

    Yes it was a bit more time with you to be the first to know about it

  • john
  • kathy b.

    you know whats ridiculously lame? when people are on someone else’s blog trying to promote there own blog. this isn’t the place to do it it’s just lame.

SHOW MORE COMMENTS