The Spoils of Cyber Shopping

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by Leandra Medine
December 2, 2013
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Are you shopping? What are you buying? We want to know everything.

If I get one more email informing me that I have 30% off site-wide [insert e-store here] I am either going to stab myself in the knee or burn every bank card I have until this point accrued so to secure that my cash money remains just that: cash money.

Kidding, guys, I’m totally kidding. I love Cyber Monday more than I do my own elbows. And If I were Kristen Wiig’s late Surprise Party character on SNL, right now you’d see the semblance between her yelling “I’m so FREAKIN’ EXCITED” and my own. But why the excitement?

Because I’m Jewish! Duh! Nothing riles me up more than a discount, even if the marked-down item in question is still incredibly expensive, just not as expensive as it was before. Evidently, I am also a sucker — and in case you’ve already peeked through the above slideshow and are wondering which spoils I’ve officially made my own, you’re right to think those there burgundy suede and orange patent leather and acid yellow square toe Nicholas Kirkwood pumps have my name written all over them.

Before we proceed, here’s something to consider: if this were just ten years ago, my bet is that running around yelling “Cyber Monday” would probably force you to think that today is the day the world’s largest internet orgy is taking place, right? That alone should make sitting back, losing cash and marveling in the mere fact that no sexually digitized infections are going around considerably easier.

Glad we got that out of the way. They’re grouped by price in descending order so if you’re looking at that black Chloé skirt thinking, “What!?!?!?!?? $2,970?” don’t worry, that’s a special “enchilada” offering that I don’t actually assume you will — or should — buy. It’s just so damn pretty and makes me want to become a dumpster-diving ballerina. You can sympathize with that, can’t you? Also on the WTF scale: that burgundy Margiela motorcycle jacket which is now $952 but, but, but an additional 20% off the ticketed price at checkout until midnight. I’m not saying do it, but I’m also not saying don’t.

Where things are slightly but not much more affordable: you can now have a red Saint Laurent iPad case for $595. It will moonlight as a clutch. If you hate moonlighting because it reminds you of bare asses, how about Pierre Hardy’s suede, four tone clutch, which is now $522? It’s holiday time, people. Forget regret or life is yours to miss.

In a territory I’ll call Under 500, we have the aforementioned Nicholas Kirkwood pumps for $497, Chloé mid-heels for French people only $469, an Opening Ceremony jacket that will not keep your legs warm but will make your neck look cool — pun intended — for $452 and a Stella Jean Coat for $450 that actually might. And because gluttony is in this month, how about a Shorouk ring for $450 or Saint Laurent sneakers for $401? No? Okay. Whatever.

For under $400 you can score your very own MM6 wool jacket for $398, a Stella McCartney candy clutch for $393, a J.W Anderson mohair sweater that could very well double as a jacket because that shit warm for $391, the most magical Delpozo top for $360 or a Phillip Lim cosmetic case, one that also maintains the ability to be something it is not for $346.

For under $300, we’ve got you covered with an Isabel Marant fuzzy-ass sweater for $284, a Carven crossover button up for $270, a red and pink Marni Dress that is perfect for girls who like to pretend to be ladies for a mere $248, Dannijo earrings for $241, Valentino Boots for $239, a Chloé shirt dress for $239, a Tibi Skirt for $227, and [insert breath here] a Pink Carven Skirt for $210.

At under $200 how about a pair of sunglasses? They’re by the Row. Or pumps? Also of the Marni variety? They’ve got straps and they’re $151. You can take the J.Crew half denim varsity jacket for $150, or a pink Suno shirt dress for $137. There’s a clutch, by Santi, for $130 and, drum roll please: some Isabel Marant jeans, now $100.

And finally, because, again, you might want to masquerade as a lady, here are leather gloves from J. Crew for $82. To tickle your blogger bone, Phillip Lim’s now ubiquitous I Love Nueva York tee is $81 and that’s a wrap. Where you going? What you doing? Tell me everything. Leave nothing out.

Feature image via Vogue Italia, shot by Steven Meisel

REPLIES
  • mywhiteT

    Great post! Love cyber mondays to so many designer brands for less of its price is the best gift I enjoy! mywhiteT.com

  • Madeleine

    Hi! I just wrote a little piece of writing regarding the Angora mayhem in the industry at the moment, there’s so many more dark secrets we’re neglecting. Would really love som feedback from someone who cares!! xoxo http://www.madeleineholth.com

    • Mariana

      Madeleine, thank you so much for your note. I too began asking myself these questions after having read through a PETA pamphlet handed to me on the street a few months ago, wherein all the cruel ways animal fur, skin and plumage are obtained for our daily consumption were listed and vividly described. This ethical dilemma is exacerbated by the poor labor laws and, I would even add, environmental regulations that are set in place by various countries around the globe to bolster their economies and maintain their competitive advantage in an ever evolving world market. I now question the source of all of the products I own, and the terribly damaging effects they may have caused to someone or something, unbeknownst to me. Cosmetics and pharmeuticals are another issue. Do I really want to use a face wash, scrub, cream, blush, lipstick, etc that was thoroughly tested on innocent animals prior to its distribution? The problem extends beyond simple neglect on the part of consumers, for I believe, as you say, these stories are kept “secret” for a reason. (Not surprisingly, “Tested on Animals” is not something most brands proudly state on their labels.) Realizing that the earth on which we live continuously thrives off the carelessness and greed of large corporations has not been an easy pill to swallow, but it has been a valuable life lesson for I have become a more conscious consumer because of it.

      • madeleine holth

        I completely agree with you. It’s definitely worth discussing. I wrote this more in a very frustrated mindset. I have never been the “burn your bra” / “Save the whales” type of gal. I own fur, leather, sketchy cosmetics and tons of knits and I’m not afraid to be honest about it. I wanted to angle it toward people being crazy stupid radical about this. One video – equals – the worlds second biggest fashion corp stopping all production. But now I realize, it has made me more aware, more respectful and definitely and most importantly curious. If we don’t ask questions, there will be no answers. I hope that people will some how understand, take responsibility and demand change. The factories has to learn what the fashionistas already know; the cheaper alternative isn’t always better… I hate comment blasting blogs, but it’s necessary when the topic is important.

  • K.C.

    I love Cyber Monday, the markdown on that Suno dress is crazy good.

    onacruz.blogspot.com

  • Quinn Halman

    Question: what’s everyone’s strategy for buying jeans? I know Rag and Bone I can go a size down than normal but J Brand I have to go a size up. I’ve never ordered jeans online but I just can’t get exactly what I desire when I’m in a store. I genuinely want to know what you all do

    • Charlotte Fassler

      I am typically wary about purchasing pants online, however I have found it isn’t very difficult to alter them if they’re too large. With jeans, I definitely take into consideration the material so that I can account for how stretchy they may or may not be.

      • Leandra Medine

        Pants are so weird, just generally. I’d say it only makes sense to a. buy pants you already have but want in different finishes (so, jeans) or b. buy big ass balloon pants because they’re practically dresses.

        • Quinn Halman

          THANKS ALL! The advice has been noted. See, this is why I love this site, who else would I pose this question to?

    • http://b-tg.tumblr.com/ Colleen Garrity

      I always look at the stretch- 2% or less and you better be super sure, 3% or more you can kinda hedge on the size.
      I’ve bought J Brand/Rag and Bone/Citizen of Humanity/Anlo jeans online, and my experience has been that if I know my size for a similar style from the same brand then I never have a problem ordering another pair online.

      Seconded on Leandra’s balloon pants though. I have like a three-size window for boyfriend/high-waisted/mom jeans, and it’s GREAT .

  • http://www.hannekeverstegen.com/ Hanneke

    Wow, that’s a lot of info to take in. I think I will start at Net-A-Porter ;) Happy Monday! xo Hanneke

    oh and if you want to check out my style pls check http://www.hannekeverstegen.com

  • Xandra Boersma

    Supercute! Online shopping is gonna be the death of me.

  • http://mafaldadotzero.blogspot.fr/ Mafalda

    I would like the above items delivered at my place by Santa on Christmas Day, cheers.

    Mafalda ❤
    http://www.mafaldadotzero.blogspot.fr

  • CDJ

    Just want to take a brief moment to give you props for quoting RENT. My AIM profile circa 2005 does the same.

    and today purchased shark slippers for $12.

  • Frenchef

    Dear Leandra – Cut it out!!! Just when I think I can’t possibly need or want anything more this season, and after having exhausted every financial avenue I have to satisfy my fashion shopping addiction, and even after having scoured the same sites as you, you show me something I didn’t notice or see in quite the same way, and now I MUST buy “just one more thing”. Seriously, I LOVE your style (and your writing). It’s been mine for years, and now I have two simple words to describe it…

  • AS Style & Design

    Oh my God!!! Shopping, shopping, shopping…wherever, whenever!!!!

    We are getting crazy, hahaha, let’s go!!!!!

    Kisses

    Alicia & Sofía

    http://asstyleanddesign.blogspot.com

  • http://www.anorexicescapades.com/ BougieHippie

    All yawl buying clothes and I’m over here waiting for the 50inch smart t.v. I just purchased for $300….

    http://www.anorexicescapades.com

  • Hannah

    I held it together until Madewell. Because all leather brown booties need a home, and I am undeniably selfless.

  • dresses
  • Emily

    I Cyber Saturday-ed and Black Monday-ed for no apparent reason. I guess I’m a rebel.
    Here’s what I’ve snagged so far…
    -Rag and Bone olive green trousers (I refuse to call them cargo pants) from barneys.com for $79!
    -T by Alexander Wang black long sleeve t shirt from yoox
    -Vintage snake ring from Etsy
    -BCBG wedge pumps that look like those Burberry ones
    -Isabel Marant for H&M man jeans
    -Zara Patti Smith t shirt
    -Zara black denim mini skirt
    -Zara leather/shearling jacket
    As I type this I’m wearing my new Isabel Marant for H&M fringe boots that literally just came in the mail, that I ordered via Ebay. Hey I got my Xmas shopping done early-I have no guilt!
    theleatherboots.tumblr.com

  • Kalli

    Im a jewish blogger too! haha

  • Lavender

    It’s cool, but it’s not enough discount for Cyber Monday as I think, the same discount it’s possible to get at any other time, when there are other discounts, I mean discounts for this day should be really fierce like 90% off

  • Laura

    Pucci sarong on net-a-porter I’ve been eying since May. I figure there will always be a iteration of it for sale, might as well commit

  • Lilli

    what the shit. can you not post this right not. I just got a three parking fines in two weeks and the last thing i want to do is pay them right now omfg!

  • Lucky

    Love cyber shopping! Check out this site http://www.fashionmyday.com

  • Kristy

    Cyber Monday = FOMO to the nth power

    Just reading this post gives me anxiety of all the designer goods marked down 90% that I didn’t bother to look for yesterday

    My sole purchase for the day was a pair of Dr Martens super white 3 Eyelet 1461 marked from 100 down to 55. Just a hint of androgyny and clunkiness of Scandinavian Chic unlike the originals, which make me look like a Manic Panic-stained middle schooler obtusely exploring punk-dom.

    Now to deal with how to wear said very white shoes on the dirty streets of NYC as a very klutzy body. Well, at least they aren’t suede…yeah I read your book!

  • sdf
  • GlamourGirl_bg

    i so get what you saying! even though i’m not jewish.
    love that chloe skirt! can’t afford it , but loove it!

    http://glamourgirl-bg.blogspot.com/2013/12/christmas-wishlist.html

  • Lydia

    Leandra, that “small studio apartment’ honestly kills me (despite the caption making me laugh)- so much beauty yet so over-priced and so little money. I can totally sympathise with your dumpster-diving ballerina fantasies, and suggest that anyone living in the US could maybe justify the $2970 knowing that if they lived in Australia, they would have to dish out $5484 on Net-a-Porter for the same piece. Sadly one of the few perils for Australians trying to access international designers. I think I’ll just stick the Sass and Bide’s sale instead (it really is just as good)!
    http://oldestfad.wordpress.com/

  • zoe_whip

    You are killin’ me Smalls!

  • Brie

    didn’t buy anything, i just spent mucho money on presents for OTHERS so 80 dollar leather gloves aren’t doing it for me. i couldn’t afford any of that shit on a good day let alone during christmas month….

  • Stacey C.

    Just the first line was enough to make me exclaim: ‘MY THOUGHTS EXACTLY’ aloud in my office. My boss must have just assumed I was in some constructive debate with my colleague. Black Friday and Cyber Monday. One more email and I will hide all my credit cards and stab my hands onto my desk.

    But really, how can any girl refuse a shopping spree when a 30% storewide edm is shoved right in her face? I took this chance to hunt down and acquired 5 Alexander Wang pieces (2 pairs of shoes, 1 bag, 1 wallet and a top). I was insaaanely happy when I saw the huge markdown on those items and the complimentary international shipping!

    After the whole fiasco, I reflected a little, regretted a little but my heart overruled all rationale. I just can’t wait to receive all my parcels, WHOOHOO!

    It’s going to be another bloody war next year but I am always up for a good fight!

    Love from Singapore,

    Stacey
    http://weekendcheoks.wordpress.com