Five Things I Learned from Wearing Man Pants

Like, for example, how nice it is that I don't have a penis.

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I have worn the above outfit approximately eight times since Saturday. What’s more? It feels brand new every single time I polish it off with that denim jacket. And though I fear my enchantment will fade simply by virtue of having photographed it (thanks, Charlotte) and shared it on a blogging platform, I am willing to take the risk. Why? Because there’s a lesson to be learned and — spoiler alert — it’s a good one.

So, ready?

Lady pants: who needs ‘em? The magic is in the men’s department.

[Cue collective, unanimous: DUH.]

Seriously though, I’m starting to feel like we are the boy who cried “wolf” only we’re mostly girls and we’re crying “pants.” We talk and talk and talk and talk (and talk) about the joys of menswear day in and out but how often are we (collective, not just me) actually forgoing ladieswear in favor of the Y-chromosome analogue?

It occurred to me when I first set out to fray those straight-leg jeans as documented last Friday that I’d never actually gone out of my way to buy a pair of men’s pants. Once I did, I couldn’t stop, which brings me to today where I sit clad in a pair of navy blue corduroys from — you guessed it — Uniqlo, reflecting on the multitude of fabric ankles still on my kitchen floor making possible the current exposure of my stealthy joints while I wax poetic on the five important things I’ve learned from wearing men’s pants.

4

#1: Their front and back pockets are considerably larger than ours are. This brings me to another point: has anyone ever considered the fact that maybe, just maybe, we’re the ones who have to come with baggage for this precise reason? Our pockets don’t nest shit but whose fault is that?

1a. While we’re on the topic of pockets, it is notable that men’s back pockets are positioned lower than ours thus creating the illusion of a more beautiful behind. Ours sit directly over our cheeks and end before our asses do. This creates a crease that I really don’t feel like going into detail about.

#2. Finding a good pair of mid-rise jeans can only really be achieved in the men’s department because the lady versions tend to be so tight around the back that our thighs and ass appear like two separate entities. When that’s not the case, it’s because they’re manipulated to look like men’s jeans, which makes them more expensive than they would have been had you just gone to the wiener depot like I told you to.

(On this note, the bonus point for us is that we don’t actually have wieners.)

#3. Vanity sizing is never an issue. While at Zara you may be an XS one day and an L the following, when considering men’s jeans you’ve got to surrender your right to a small size fairly early as you’ll be going up at least two or three sizes from your women’s fit. Even then,  remember, they’re not your numbers so they don’t matter. It’s beautiful, really.

#4. If you, like me, have never been good with scissors but want to get better, cropping pants on a near daily basis is a good way to achieve that level of perfection. I will, however, say that there is some value in leaving some of the pants long and wearing them baggy like you’re Miranda Kerr or something.

And finally, #5: It’s refreshing to think that when they say, “she wears the pants,” they mean it.

Acne jacket, Uniqlo jeans, t-shirt from Topshop, Oliver Peoples sunglasses, Nicholas Kirkwood heels. Bracelets by Paula Mendoza and CC Skye.

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Thoughts?
  • http://alcessa.wordpress.com/ alcessa

    AMEN to all of the above PLUS: if I wear skinny man pants, they tend to change my curves into something I actually like

    • http://www.EatStylePlay.com/ Eat.Style.Play

      Wouldn’t even know if you didn’t mention it they look really nice.

      • http://alcessa.wordpress.com/ alcessa

        THX: I took my husband to H and M and tried them on and he said he liked them so …

        I am not sure, but I often think men’s jeans are better because the material is thicker and the black is .. blacker. Maybe.

    • http://melindaisnot.com/ Melinda

      Hear, hear! I’ve tried to love the skinny jeans in ‘our’ department, but the men’s always, always fit better and wear better.

      • http://alcessa.wordpress.com/ alcessa

        So the grass really IS greener there :-)

        (I’ve worn only aitch and em and cheap monday skinnies so far and yes, they are better than my “our” ones)

  • Natali

    Great pants and shoes… The kind of pants I could never pull off :P

    http://lartoffashion.blogspot.com

  • http://www.commecoco.com/ J. Jehanne

    I always steam my boyfriends pants and wear them because they fit my athletic shape so much better than women’s sizing. I also agree about the pockets and the rise! Great post and I absolutely adore the oversized nature of that denim jacket…. I am off to thrift something similar (2 of them) so I can hack off the sleeves of one of them or even make it short sleeved… hmmmmm the possibilities!

  • Jimmy Buffet

    Anybody know of a cheaper alternative to the denim jacket?

  • Miriam van Klinken

    I could actually cry……….I have found someone that loves menswear (not only the MAN) as much as I do. Hopefully that will make more girls at my school consider joining me on that front! Thank you :)

  • http://www.cjshoppingtours.com/ CJ Tours

    We love shopping the men’s department, comfortable and stylish!

  • Natalie-Catherine

    Love these pants. TOO. MUCH.

    blackthumbnailblog.blogpsot.com

  • Amatoria Clothing

    I love the title :…”Wearing Man Pants”. Here’s why…
    My boyfriend’s little brother had been running around the house like a goof ball in athletic shorts. His dad asked him where the change was from an errand he ran for him. Wilk (yes, that’s his name) said that it must have fallen out of his pockets. This is when his dad got mad and told him if he had been wearing “Man Pants” this would not have happened.
    I guess wearing “Man Pants” means you’ve got your life together.

  • http://jessjoycej.wordpress.com/ Jessica Joyce

    Pockets. My favorite accessory…and utilitarian accessory at that. Men can always get away with having more pockets, when I think I need more. But that’s another topic.

    Your Friend, Jess

  • sarahmira

    love the pants.
    check my blog http://www.sarahmira.com :)

  • Guest

    I just fucking love you.

  • DefensiveMidfield

    I have a men’s tee from ASOS, it fits exactly like those “boyfriend tees” i used to pay hundreds for. Now I will never buy oversized tees from woman department again.

    I guess its the same with jeans

    Cheers!

    FashionDefensiveMidfield

  • Noo

    As a UK fan, I did wonder if you meant boxers or Y fronts…..

  • http://www.farandwildjewelry.com/ abigail lind

    it’s about time we took back our pants from the man. die low rise, hip hugger, back pocketless jeans from hell!

    abigail
    http://www.farandwildjewelry.com

  • Emma
  • Chrissybag

    Today after reading you thus following your advice, bought a fab pair of men’s Carreras jeans at the Auchan supermarket in Rome. They look good .. Pockets right, length right all alright! Thankyou Leandra!

  • http://twitter.com/cocolien Coco

    Why has this never occurred to me? Why have I been doing this wrong for so long? Why am I so surprised? I DON’T KNOW. But I am so glad I came across this post.

  • Marija Rangelov
  • Tuloucheslautrec

    Good to know we share the same opinion on menswear: feminism at its climax. Have you given thought to wearing men’s underwear as shorts? It’s a summer outfit sure, but man those things are comfy. Love your blog, I send my best from Switzerland

  • charlotte

    looking on point as always MR

    http://theyauyee.blogspot.co.uk

  • Tensy

    The Wall Street Journal did an article recently on “Women’s fashion turns to Menswear for Tips.” You are not alone in your preferences. See the story at: http://online.wsj.com/news/articles/SB10001424052702303342104579101660356946076

  • Lilli

    I wish for xmas that i stop looking like a 16 year old and actually grow in a 20 yr olds frame so that menswear is wearable. At the moment if i try wearing anything from the mens department i end up looking like I’m wearing my fathers 90′s wide leg jeans… not in a good way

  • EveB

    Ran out and got myself a pair of men’s Levi’s ($24.99 at TJ Maxx!) and at that price, fearlessly cut them. LOVE the look. Thank you for this!!

  • Alejandra Juárez

    where are your sunglasses from?

  • cuntmuffin

    well you look terrible

  • Melodie

    My pair of mens jeans (Levis 514!) give me a weird fabric bulge where my penis should be… is this normal? Is it the jeans? I’m currently blaming my weird thighs. Other than that, entirely agree with this.

    • http://alcessa.wordpress.com/ alcessa

      Some of them actually do that, that’s why it is a good idea to try them on.

  • Thomas

    Pretty sure I say these exact words to all my male friends buying girly jeans…

    • Michigan Patriot

      they is no such thing as girly jeans; transvestite jeans, yes !

  • http://www.thesugarspunsisters.blogspot.com/ Sugar Spun Sisters

    You wouldn’t necessarily know they were men’s and they look so good on you!

    Loved this post :)

    Eve & Faye x

    Sugar Spun Sisters – A blog about cosmetics, clothes & coeliac disease

  • http://afterthe40barfinish.blogspot.com/ Nina Piccini

    as someone on the curvier side mens pants would be a difficult fit – however, I’m loving the idea

    xo, Nina

    • liv

      I agree. Denim in general just gives me a headache.

  • notrunofthemill

    this makes me think about thrifting 20 years ago for guys levis cords and how awesome they were and now I’m kicking myself for getting rid of them

  • Heatherclancy

    Changing lives!

  • Rachael Kilgour

    Everything on my wish list is now getting bumped for a pair of lads trews’ – never thought I’d see the day!

  • margot

    but do you ever mess up when you cut them??

    • Leandra Medine

      YES. I ruined a pair of white jeans last weekend

  • Restless Blonde

    Not my style too much, but still I like what you wrote :)

    http://restlessblonde.blogspot.com/

  • meg busacca

    I think you really pull of those man pants because of those amazing heels! I am a heel fanatic!

    http://beingbusacca.wordpress.com/

  • Nicole

    I love. :)

  • Jenna

    What size do you had to take? I want to order these but not sure what size I should go for?!
    Thanks

  • Molly

    Yes and! I want more pictures of women in man pants. I’ve been rocking some olive carhartts and big ol’ butch belt. I love to pare with something fem. Also been shopping around for a suit.

    I am new to your blog. Can’t stop gawking/keep up the good work. Thanks.

  • http://www.jennysuemakeup.com/ JennySue Makeup

    These points make complete sense, and I’m actually contemplating going to purchase a pair of mens pants this weekend just because. Or at least try a few on in the women’s dressing room. I’ve only been in Uniqlo once while visiting NYC, bought way too much crap bc the prices were so good, and now am jonesing to go back bc I love all of my purchases from there!!

  • Kate

    I do really want to try on a pair of men’s slim khakis/ chinos just to see! In my head they would look great in a slightly girlier Annie Hall kind of way. Especially casually cuffed with feminine shoes. Well… consider me inspired. Next time I’m shopping I’m going to go for it. I can’t help wondering though, do they make pants for men this short? I guess I’ll find out.

  • charlottec

    I’m a true believer in wearing men pants, just got a new one the other day. Just realized we have to be very careful with the fitting sometimes, as those gentlemen have some little extras in the front, and it might not be very graceful on a lady haha! (personal experience, fail)
    bisous from Paris

  • Fashion Avenger

    Enjoying of conquering menswear both from the original menswear departments or from their own transvestite departments and still not satisfied with their total freedom. These female cross-dressers have way more fashion freedom in historical menswear than males !

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  • Michigan Patriot

    No matter were she obtains the pants / trousers from what gender department; she is still a transvestite/ cross dresser who has more menswear styles to choose from than males ! At least males should have more duo-gender menswear that transvestites ! Switch gender fashion freedoms and see how ridiculously sexist it is !