When the pictured Altuzarra skirt went on sale on Net-a-Porter from it’s original $15 billion to a more consumable but still-too-high-to-purchase $750, I felt defeated. Why? Because a beige, pin striped skirt that features gold tassel trim work and fabric mutations that point toward one hell of a regal labia (do you see what I see?) practically begs for proprietorship and when you can’t deliver, it is disheartening to tuck away any hedonistic inclinations in favor of the unavoidable humdrum.
From my experience, though, a burning desire to own–if even just for a mere 48 hours–shall always prevail. As my dad likes to retierate, “if there is a will, there is a way.” Which is precisely the truism-coming-true that rendered this dance:
Come to think of it, actually, the fleeting sense of ownership completely affected the details of this tango, too:
Effectively, I’d borrowed the skirt, which only made it temporarily mine and which meant that I had exactly two days to wax poetic on the ways in which a five pound skirt (I’d guess that’s how much it weighs) should be worn outside the confines of a. Fashion Week, b. formal event season, c. “shoot me with your camera!” land.
When I monitored the cloth that bares slight semblance to a Jewish talit while it was on Net-a-Porter, there was only ever one left. That meant that several gens had already purchased the spoil, which also meant that they’d presumably been wearing it, or worse and probably more accurately – were just letting it hang by its lonesome self in their closets, waiting for the perfect opportunity, right?
The thing of it is, if you’re spending so much money on a skirt, you’ve really got to figure out how to wear it day in and out, no?
It’d have been easy to pair the Talladegan night with a pair of heels and a cropped blouse, or a button down, or jacket but how frequently are we really dressed to go to parties? My guess: unless you’re Anna dello Russo, not that frequently at all. But that shouldn’t deter you/us from wanting to have nice things.
Rather, it should provoke us to reinvent the ways in which the item in question is worn. In my case, I could only imagine that a skimpy white ribbed tank top and dirty old white sneakers could do the job I wanted it to: have the skirt take me to Whole Foods, then home, then out, then back, then out again, maintaining a sense of cool and simultaneous, utter comfort. I am also pretty sure my body learned about the joys of carrying around extra weight and it really wasn’t too bad.
Holstering any fancy booty that you’re dying to wear but just find yourself incapable of wearing? Talk to me — if there’s a will, there’s a way.