Thursday, May 19, 2011

From Man Getter to Man Repeller: Holy Boob Cups!

I haven’t run an installment of From MG to MR in quite a while. Quite. In fact, if I remember correctly, the last time I did, I instructed all of you to turn porn into prunes. Unfortunately, I don’t have that sort of sage advice to offer today, just a fantastic lesson in layering light. It’s simple, really. Instead of wool, we basically use various forms of cotton for the layers and in some instances will likely apply holy shirt! hole-y shirts to the overall look, tambien. See that? I am so bilingual chic.

Ultimately, summer doesn’t have to mean a tank top and shorts so take a cue or two from the boob cups below and exercise your power to mask them. 

Also, put a bird on it. Why? Because.

dress: Prim NYC, shoes: Christian Louboutin
Step 1: Look how sad I am, it’s the wrath of the boob cups. That’s not really what I’m sad about, actually. My bedroom was 500 degrees on this day. Stupid building won’t turn on air until June 1 which at the moment given the torrential downpour and mild temperatures, I don’t mind, but shit man, we’ve had some hot days this May. That aside though, there’s something to be said about the compromising nature of this dress. The brocade skirt is puffy and interesting enough to ring in a man repeller, and the top, sexy enough to ring in a prostitute. I’m just kidding. Boob cups do not equal prostitute. They equal boobs that need tender love and caring. It’s a win, win, you see. Anyway…
long sleeve shirt: Reformation
Step 2: The wheels of prostitution are not in motion so I put a long sleeved cotton tee over the boob cups. I speculated that it might make for some stealthy layering.
striped crop top: American Apparel
Step 3: And my speculation was correct. A striped cropped t-shirt over the long sleeve t-shirt and holy moly me oh my, I’m matching. Look, I’m starting to giggle because I can feel weeners shrinking within a ten-block radius from my standing point.
But man oh man, my legs, my feet.
Me thinks it’s time for a shoe change…
 My little pony goes drag! Hey RuPaul! I can’t stop exclamating!
Step 5: The colors, Duke. The colors! One yellow jacket and some bright pink shoes that look like throw pillows, coming right up! I still can’t stop exclamating!
Incase you didn’t hear the aforecry…my little pony goes drag!
And now, for the finishing touches:
rings: DANNIJO, Kimberly Baker, Bvlgari, Lucid, YSL

Rings and things! Because arm parties are cool, but do you know what’s cooler? Yes, yeah, yep, you’re right. The answer is finger parties. If at the very least because technically speaking, it’s a battle at two against ten. 

Okay now, your turn! Hide those boob cups!

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