Monday, March 14, 2011

Staying Single: A Lesson in Layering Leather

Though daylight losings time has come and gone, the cold weather doesn’t seem to be letting go. Raise your hand if this has been the most obnoxious winter to fuck with your immune system?

Because of inclement weather conditions, shivering bones, and things like pneumonia, I thought I’d post one last winter-friendly layering story before I start preaching the art of layering your underwear. No really. I layered underwear last night. It was fun.

On today’s roster: leather, leather and more pleather! One is often prone to associate leather with Cat Woman, Angelina Jolie and sexual vixens of that sort. This is where I come in so below you will find a fantastic series of photos that will demonstrate the art of castration sans-torture instrument, plus fabric. 

 
t shirt: Club Monaco, leather pants: Topshop, loafers: Stubbs and Wootton
Phase 1: While this is as standard an outfit as any, I have a leather fupa and for that, I deserve an award.
 
shorts: Club Monaco
Phase 2: leather shorts over leather pants, by golly, why did it take me until the end of February to think this one up?
 
skirt: Zara
Phase 3: The use of those shorts obviously sparked a brilliant idea: make it a skort night.
 
…See what I mean? See what I mean? Leather party in, on and around my pants.
 
vest: WGACA
Phase 4: Add a leather vest. Here’s to motorcyclists without motorcycles.
 
jacket: Veda
Phase 5: Leather jacket. This is saucy.
 
birth control glasses: Warby Parker, booties: Proenza Schouler
Phase 6: Finishing touches to nip his tip. Clear frames–non-prescription, of course–leather booties and ta da, not an ounce of flesh in sight. Let’s hereby dub this,“Matrix chic” and sing a song of collective solidarity that goes a bit like this: L-L-L-Leather is Forever.
Copyright infringement notice: Stole that slogan off an old Moschino belt hanging out in my mother’s closet.
…Sometimes even I can’t believe I’m actually human. Photo by Chuck Grant.

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  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/17867844664084693151 Fantasy Candy

    great pics. i love black and the combination is perfect.

    http://fantasycandy.blogspot.com/

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/05882333911932324281 blue roses

    you look all set to head off to some single mixing asphyxiation fetish party… of course, only to enjoy the free wine and cheese.

    http://dallianceswithsuitsandskirts.blogspot.com/

  • http://www.soontrend.com Tasha

    That is A LOT of leather. But I L-L-L-Like it. See what I did there?
    X

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/09739251167444138491 Fashion Agony
  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/07551626463064699957 Emi P.

    wow !
    impressive !

    xxx,
    Emi
    http://emigolightly.blogspot.com/

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/01855465452268016894 Lily Delphine Sanders

    your posts crack me up and as much as you repel men, you still look pretty chic in my eyes! bravo!

    http://www.lilydelphine.blogspot.com

  • http://ruxandra-soare.blogspot.com/ Rux

    gosh, there is so much leather :D

  • http://www.cupcakesomg.blogspot.com CupcakesOMG!

    LOL!!! i love the way your mind works…also, i'm fairly certain youre wearing more leather than I've ever owned throughout my entire life. well done.

    http://www.cupcakesomg.blogspot.com

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/11559325754312043870 Inside my head and wardrobe

    i love your skirt with those leather trousers ! great blog ! i love the last picture

    http://myheadandwardrobe.blogspot.com/

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/05329196451830464702 Dominika

    this is so great!
    <3

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/17307750287416918321 Closet Fashionista

    Hahaha I LOOOOVE THIS!!!! You look so awesome, I love the skirt over the shorts, over the pants :D
    http://www.closet-fashionista.com/

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/08859699093296021486 girlgerms

    totally digging the leather jacket.
    keep on repelling!

  • camille

    this makes me think of a yeast infection. there is single and then there is single and itchy

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/00186653388828397132 indie.electronic.alternative.

    this is hilarious. you're petite and you pull it off. at 5'9'' if i wore head to toe leather in layers i'd look like an assassin. i gotta limit it to leggings and a jacket. kudos.
    http://indieelectronicalternative.blogspot.com/

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/11286149288842617111 Ofelia

    love the first one! its so simple and pretty!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/03401686887977484323 Man Repeller

    @indie, I'm 5'8!! If I can pull it off, you can pull it off! And what's wrong with looking like an assassin?

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/02732304197665787934 emma basilone

    I absolutely LOVE your blog!!! This look is hot.

    <3

    http://behindtheleopardglasses.blogspot.com/

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/01695069680470033086 featherfactor

    Based on this photo you are more cow than human…had to go there, sorry…lol. I love leather though.

    http://www.featherfactor.com

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/14379815840112190010 Nino Eliava

    u're so funny and cool
    love ur blog
    maybe u'll like mine

    http://trivialinsanity-n.blogspot.com/

  • http://www.myvisahatesme.com/ Martha C.

    it looks AMAZING but answer me this: How in Davie Crockett's fringey buckskins are you going to pee?

  • Emma ♥

    you are wearing, like, about 3.5 cows and that's the best thing ever. best of all, apart from the likelihood of *creaking* as you walk/prance/skip with joy at your own genius in creating this outfit, you could do cartwheel upon cartwheel and worry NOT about flashing your foof in any way at all, even if you tried. bravo vagina hider, bravo. xx

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/07904293199101553442 Jessie

    girl in leather! i love the leather pleated skirt. it is so gorgeous!

    http://wordbyjessie.com

  • http://www.siljeu.blogg.no Silje

    OMG – Brilliant!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/16806638711087168427 magna rún

    Aha I love this, cant wait for the underwear layering tutorial :) !!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/07581382809075274819 Johanna & Charles

    Oww lala. I love the end result! Very nyc! I want!!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/17570422656943252958 neko

    Dude: With that much leather on, doesnt yr lady-azz sweat like crazy ?!

    [YEEEeesh ....]

    =^..^=

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/11285421781235824373 TheBeautyFile

    You are so much more fun than the typical human!!!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/14227790770455857624 The Fancy Teacup

    I was already mesmerized by your strategic pairing of the leather skirt with the leather pants…and then ta-dah! You have leather shorts doing peek-a-boo underneath!
    So cunning. You totally are superhuman.

    http://www.TheFancyTeacup.com
    much love.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/07123583203601488166 Steffy’s Pro’s and Con’s

    you just blew my mind. leather pants under leather shorts under a leahter skirt. WHATTTTT

    <3 steffy
    steffysprosandcons.blogspot.com

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/02004474407720975011 sammi burley (chase.dakota)

    wow that's a lot of leather… looks good though!

    http://www.chasedakota.blogspot.com

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/02051978378044333716 Michele

    Hhahah this is just too much. Love it!
    Also I am pretty much a pro at man repelling and I have this blog to thank for it.
    Much appreciated!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/17821396915629538029 Gabi Coelho

    Wow, that's a lot of imagination! Love it!
    Great post!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/08209410201811304112 Neiry
  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/16747921195231684047 Francesca

    hahaha this is phenomenal!

    xoxo,
    F

    Le Kiss Kiss- Click Here!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/06782565149629105377 Katie

    You are officially my hero.

  • Anonymous

    I love you + your blog, but sometimes I wonder if you'd actually leave the house in some of your outfits, especially this one.

    Regardless, you're great. I can't help but bring you up in every conversation I have with someone. <3

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/00143904555736738767 Emma

    GO SKOOOOORT!!
    HAHAHA GOD YOU'RE AWESOME!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/03401686887977484323 Man Repeller

    @anonymous This one I did in fact wear out just after the photos were taken

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/00277242890112706565 Taylor B.

    How fast did you start sweating in that?

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/01833953291419734182 kimchicsisters
  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/05692727759428617647 Tiffany Yet To Be Determined

    OMG, I love this look with an unearthly passion. You are truly a genius. What I wouldn't do for that outfit? *Thinking* I don't know if I agree with you though as it being man repelling…If you were to visit say ComiCon,(or any number of *cons*), I think you would have a nights worth of empty condom packages at your feet.

    Fearlessly Female (clickity-click!)

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/16746832117478394961 CoutureJunkie

    Ha Ha! You and your quips always make my day.
    P.S. If you have to pee in a public restroom, how hard is it to remove all those layers?

    -xo
    Bobbie
    http://www.confessionsofacouturejunkie.com

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/13765427511236075494 Allie

    Omg this is brilliant! I almost wish winter wasn't ending so I could wear something like this every day. Almost.

    http://www.thevanitylair.com/

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/00162561384736783299 Amaezing Fashion

    leather on leather= love!

    xx
    amaezingfashion.blogspot.com

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/09610012075884637017 Tonya

    hahahah I love reading your captions to everything!
    This seriously just made my day…week probably.
    Genius :)

    http://www.themoptop.com

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/05763679557322734420 hels

    I'm not a leather person. In fact, I don't think I've ever owned anything leather other than boots and cuffs, but man – that look is gooooood.

  • http://huntgatherfashion.com/ HuntGatherFashion

    I almost thought you were going to go "surprise DIY!" with the skort thing. Like, actually whip out a mammoth pair of scissors and cut that skirt shorter than the shorts to gain a more "skortish" effect. It's an idea. You can put it in the bank for future manrepeller if you dig it.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/17105703171213822823 patrycja2407

    amazing skirt! :)
    I love it!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/18359692445710227141 Collections

    that's a lot of leather but surprisingly enough i like it! I love leather. the zara skirt and topshop pants are great.

    http://www.fashionablecollections.blogspot.com

  • http://leftonboise.com LEFTONBOISE

    Nip his tip! Nip his tip! (Soooo stealing this phrase for use in e-v-e-r-y s-i-n-g-l-e t-h-i-n-g!)

    http://leftonboise.com

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/15459122621884636247 Annabelle Fleur

    Well, you look very cheery for someone demonstrating the fine art of castration:)I just love reading your blog! So very clever and funny!

    Love from LA,
    Annabelle
    http://vivaluxury.blogspot.com

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/13032949123461819866 Jac

    Bravo for not fainting in any of these photos. All that leather would suffocate me. BTW if a guy did pursue a man repeller wearing this I'm pretty sure the near impossible feat of removing all this leather after a night out would deflate his sail and send him on his own walk of shame.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/05208759638166867619 Riz

    ahaha I don't even know it is remotely possible for you to be squatting like that! But you did! and you made it work!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/00896638834590707229 Miss Molly

    you are fantastic! love this

    http://missmollyfashions.blogspot.com/

  • http://www.fashionslap.me kate

    Ugh now the only reason I wouldn't be able to stand this is because I would probably sweat like crazy and then my ass cheeks would stick together and that would just not be fun…it wouldn't be just man repelling it would be people repelling and mind repelling at that point. Who wants to be the girl with sweaty ass cheeks? Not me.

  • http://flyingccarpet.wordpress.com/ flyingccarpet

    you are the best!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/06303665587576888183 Nomadic D.

    not only are you hilarious but it also seems you own one of the bestest leather jackets in the world. jealousy abounds.

    http://nomadic-d.blogspot.com/

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/11562234377243458551 penelope sarah Armstrong

    this much leather should be illegal!

    I love it!

    http://www.fashion-fade.blogspot.com

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/06925121069577216028 miitu

    those look great on you! love them! <3

    http://miitumiitu.blogspot.com/

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/08531940963013426923 KateLainey

    Leather to the max – awesome! Ha repel those men!

  • http://sarahenicephotography.com/ Sarah

    I LOVE those glasses. And the pants.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/02900645809855735146 Marlén
  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/15460651248255953308 Orjen

    I like you, Man-Repeller.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/15501933370258012686 kate

    FAVOURITE OUTFIT EVER.

  • Anonymous

    you are so tiny you can pull this off.
    if i wore this many leather layers, i would look like a leather sausage!!

  • http://www.tallmansclothing.com/ Tallmans Clothing

    Hi,

    i have seen a very excellent post. i really like this post. This post gives us very good knowledge about women fashion stylish clothe.

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  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/12244699657407672413 Kathryn

    I love your blog and always find it funny, but I wanted to let you know that I found this post soooo funny. I was literally cracking up as I read it

  • Catalina

    While I do think you are QUITE INSANE, I just went ahead and tried this mad idea of yours. To make the layers more apparent I alternated with black and white: black leather skirt, white t-shirt sticking under a black leather t-shirt and white leather jacket. Black and silver leather boots to top it off. Man, I can't believe how much I like this concoction! THANKS!
    My boyfriend will be terrified with this "minimalistic" look that I will call: Martin Margiela goes to space.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/10637001710961200469 Ellie

    HAHAHAHA! That is hilarious! Dear god… I hope there was mucho aircon.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/10336767030064456867 nana avec des lunettes

    Cool!! I love leather, but seeing as to how you managed to do an all leather outfit by layering it, I truly have a new found love for leather!

    avecdeslunettes.blogspot.com

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/09136474660606366005 Sydney

    I'd like to hug you in all your leathery glory, this was fantastic! But mainly because I like leather sounds…

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/07891613318929178094 I Don’t Wear Jeans

    Even I don't like that outfit & I didn't think you could ever go wrong with leather. Don't believe me, check out my blog.

    You are still a riot! LOVE your blog!

    http://idontwearjeans.blogspot.com/

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/14870866601660892910 jhuynh

    hahaha wow! so much leather!! reminds me of the matrix but taken 10 times further

    http://indiaandfen.blogspot.com/
    http://indiaandfen.blogspot.com/

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/10840722911772341627 emilie
  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/05345225002773583958 My Style Canvas

    I love all those leather pieces! I guess this stubborn cold weather does have an upside.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/07917036130656116409 H

    You should check this out.
    I'm pretty sure you'll love it!
    Hint: The inspiration was…*drumroll*…YOU!

    http://looklet.com/look/10879543

  • http://passionlessfashion.wordpress.com/ passionlessfashionistas

    you look really hot, and by that i of course mean warm. you must have been sweltering; ah, the price we pay for fashion, eh? well done, mr, well done.

    cheers!
    http://passionlessfashion.wordpress.com

  • http://openid.aol.com/lynx60489 lisa

    All you are missing are the leather finger condoms found here… would have made this even more manrepelling

    http://clothesovercarbs.blogspot.com/

    https://lh5.googleusercontent.com/-zJxwJGP-6Qw/TP77F0WP4-I/AAAAAAAAAbk/5UeSahEzSLI/s1600/30.jpg

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/07059499136811807327 CINCHED AT THE WAIST

    warning, layering can increase body temperature…lets not have a case of Ross from friends with his leather pants jaja.

    amazing leather pieces!

    always inspired reading this, great post

    -Annina
    http://www.cinchedatthewaist.com

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/17806961988545306183 Lydz xX

    hahaha love it…wow you own alot of cow !!!!
    ;p

    http://themashedup.blogspot.com/

    Lydz xX

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/12859740986902110372 Mahmood

    it looks AMAZING its so simple and pretty!
    Leather Pants

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/14548517494434374923 jessica january

    man repelling at it's best! love it!

    and your loafers :)

    january, x
    jessicajanuary.com

  • http://awinenett.wordpress.com/ awinenett

    amazing, it is actually first time i visit your blogg, but it would not be last time, i already love your blogg :)

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    Its really a wonderful post. Keep it up.

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  • Anonymous

    thats the best outfit i ever seen! awesome!
    i really like the layering of pants, shorts and the skirt! and all in the same material! perfect! go ahead with that style :D

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/00260229420469185159 riderwear

    Motorcycle jackets are always in style – for those who drive motorcycles and others. Ever wonder why? Is it because the leather jackets motorcycle is simply too big? Think about it. Motorcycle jackets are available in a wide range of simple nylon materials, including Kevlar. However, the leather retains its position as the best market niche. Of course, buying a motorcycle is a great thing, but so is the purchase of a jacket style motorcycle to go with it. A biker jacket is much more than a matter of style. A classic motorcycle jacket is not only an affirmation of the individuality of the user, but also provides security and protection against the elements and proposes the strengthening of vital importance to the organism in the case of an accident.
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  • http://twitter.com/#!/empty_sack Empty Sack

    I am not sure if you meant it that way, but as a man sans testicles, even my eyes water at the sight of those pants.

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  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/08942354054306162652 CupcakePumpkinpie

    haha shenanigans! what size do you wear for those Topshop leather pants?

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  • oinkalena8

    i don’t know but i laughed so hard at the I HAVE A LEATHER FUPA part

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  • MGF

    I miss the layering lessons !!!