I Never Met a Bow Tie I Didn’t Like

March 2, 2011

…And this one is of utmost versatility.

 Alex + Eli Bow Tie, $125, Of a Kind.
If Hamish Bowles took a trip to the American West ca. Brokeback Mountain, this is what he would wear. In light of this, I will wear it too. In several different veins. Because you see, the thing that’s so great about an adjustable bow-tie that triples as a necklace and oh, I don’t know, a head piece too, is just that. It triples as other things. That’s a multifunctia-win, a tri-mullet if you will. A suede bang for your buck. I can go on forever. …And if we won’t be banging Bucks, we should at least bang bucks. See what I just did there? See what I did?
Moving forward.
 tank: T by Alexander Wang, belt: J. Crew, jeans: Seven for all Mankind, shoes: Miu Miu
Use #1: Necklace. You might sit dumbfounded, wondering how I could subject myself to an outfit as simple as a tank, jeans and some animal print accessories. Hold your horses, crazy culotte. This photo is a perfect example of the great lengths man repelling can travel. As you can see, my pervy pedophile-provoker smile is offensive in and of itself. I was also very truly committed to having the low bow tie be the star of this outfit, and if that meant a tank and jeans, so be it. At least they’re high waist.
Use #2: Necklace again, but this time as one to display your multi-bowner. 
Use the adjustable bow tie as a means to pile all your bow ties on at once. I always say to really make a trend yours, you have to exploit it. If bow-ties are your thing, layer the shit out of them. 
Also, a note about these photos before I continue. My mom took them so before you go off insulting the quality, know that the woman who brought me to this world once again facilitated my functionality on planet earth. 
For Use #3: An Actual Bowtie. 
blouse and vest: Kimberly Taylor, jeans: Rag & Bone, shoes: Maison Martin Margiela
Wear it with a blouse and pants. I suggest you smile though, the mechanics behind this face may suggest my mother and I were arguing. You would be correct “I’m late for yoga!” She said. “What’s more important, Mom? Yoga or teaching people how to wear adjustable bow ties?” That one flew right over her head.
dress: Kimberly Taylor, shoes: Christian Louboutin
Personal affairs aside, you can also wear it with a little dress and some espadrilles that on the luxury French footwear scale resemble high-heeled sneakers from the Sketcher days. I just compared my Louboutins to Sketchers. Man Repeller: 0, World: 1.
This is also, a good opportunity to mix prints.
sweater: Madewell, blouse: M Missoni. Did I redeem myself with this one?
And finally, 
As a head piece. 
Just kidding, you can barely see it in this one, but you can toterly tell that it’s Kool with a capital K.
t shirt: T by Alexander Wang. Cool, leather braids coming out of a painful close-up of my head! …Is it just me, or is this going to make for the perfect Coachella accessory? Nothing says “this music is great! I love the West Coast!” like a suede bow coming out the side of your head.
To wrap up, I tell you this: There are only 12 left like the bolobowner in the entire world, which means one thing and one thing only. If you get one, we will be perpetually connected by means of adjustable bow tie. You and me, baby. We’ll be like the 12 Tribes of Judah, but more stylish. Though I should note Joseph’s technicolor dream coat could have given us a run for our sweet skill. Order yours here, be my tribe mate. 
I won’t throw you into a snake pit, I swear. (Jewish Bible ref.) Take that, Galliano.
  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/05882333911932324281 blue roses

    oh my god, the snake pit allusion is just a cherry on top of this satire sundae and i love it. i am super into the red pants look, you trend monger you.

    http://dallianceswithsuitsandskirts.blogspot.com/

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/04999959455015447982 Dorothy Siemens

    Loved the layered bow look! Nothing brings in the men like bows on bows on disco snake-skinned bows, pedophile smiles help though.

    That bow tie is seriously cute though!

    http://deedeeoho.blogspot.com

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/00207083711507978637 Eugenia Woods

    Bow in the hair = perfection!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/18359692445710227141 Collections

    Love the Kimberly Taylor dress and Madewell sweater.

    http://www.fashionablecollections.blogspot.com

  • http://percentblog.blogspot.com percentblog

    Have been meaning to make a bowtie necklace for a while now, thanks for give me a project for the weekend! I love the bowtie in the hair.

    http://percentblog.blogspot.com/

  • http://wordbyjessie.com/ wordbyjessie.com

    oh same. i love bows. what a cute look you have going with those bows! i wanna try it out.

    http://wordbyjessie.com

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/04736569179538930730 SarahJessica

    ahh. this is genius! I see a DIY in my future…

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/16859425344054563477 clotheshunger

    i love it as a headpiece! and you're going to coachella? JEALOUS! my little bro will be there too.

    meghan
    http://clotheshunger.blogspot.com

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/09261026967113255998 Jasmin

    I want it. And I also want your Coachella ticket! x

  • Anonymous

    i just love this! those margiela shoes are nuts!!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/05217705402360866411 Jess

    Very cute! Never guessed what u could do with a bow tie…

    http://www.LIVINgandFASHION.blogspot.com

  • http://thefashionbahr.com/ thefashionbahr.com

    love bow ties, super cute :)

    xo
    Jenn

  • http://www.twitter.com/r2l4 Jemina

    The kimberly taylor cream vest is magical

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/01222268980993221517 Ore.R
  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/07123583203601488166 Steffy’s Pro’s and Con’s

    you're making me jealous. i was just thinking today how i am missing bow ties from my wardrobe. i want i want!

    <3 steffy
    steffysprosandcons.blogspot.com

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/17307750287416918321 Closet Fashionista

    Looove these!! And I want those Miu Miu shoes!!!!
    http://www.closet-fashionista.com

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/13678937953382560659 J’Anns Boutique

    Loving the look with the tank and jeans…sorry not man repelling hehe.

    Confessions of a Purse-a-holic

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/16802644295099928921 Sarah Dee

    The Galliano crack was hilarious!

    <3 Sarah
    theantiquepearl.blogspot.com

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/16835866023864130131 andrea paola

    you're perfect <333

    check out my blog http://syntheticcandy.blogspot.com/

  • http://www.shopblacklabel.com Yanira Garza

    I browse a lot of personal style blogs. Yours is the only one I read. I'm laughing so hard I could die, pee or both. I'm going to become a husband repeller today and rock my bowtie. Maybe I'll get some sleep tonight. Kudos on the Galliano diss (love it).

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/11824440493038509210 Vfriedrich

    Why are you so cute? I want those red Rag and Bone jeans like NOW. XO Valerie

    http://www.imstarvin.blogspot.com

  • http://therealmeangirl.com MG

    Love love love boleros. Reminds me of cowboys…and their hot butts. Mmmhmmm.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/14626000836151819095 Pink_Diamond

    Interesting:)

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/00896638834590707229 Miss Molly

    this is amazing, i ♥ you!

  • http://huntgatherfashion.com/ Sarah

    Mixed prints is my favorite! Makes me think of a nerdy cowboy.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/06817440115036704641 Brittany Matthews

    I love this so much!
    I want to make one of my own. The way you used the bows in your outfits is soo adorable. Thank you for sharing!

    Your blog is great. Your passages make me laugh, love it.

    follow my blog at:
    http://therealbisforbrittany.blogspot.com/

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/02732304197665787934 emma basilone

    I LOVE all of these looks!! You are so cute & creative, I love reading your blog!!

    http://behindtheleopardglasses.blogspot.com/

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/09036541506579547090 Danielle

    Love it. I have a soft spot for bows. :)

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/04497948628629995575 Peroxide Blonde

    Ahahaaaaaaaa please some more Galliano jokes!!
    What camera do you use??

    Peroxide Blonde
    http://theperoxideblonde.blogspot.com/

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/15763093551327175277 Aimee

    This totally just cheered up my day. I. LOVE. THIS. Wish I could afford one!

    x

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/09739251167444138491 Fashion Agony

    Great piece, a bit overpriced though :)

    xoxo
    http://fashionagony.blogspot.com/

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/01833953291419734182 kimchicsisters
  • http://www.elvafields.com Emily

    Love that your mom was part of the action…and sacrificed a few zen moments as a yogi for the sake of bow-tie fashion awesomeness. Thank you for the smile this afternoon.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/14227790770455857624 The Fancy Teacup

    I'm pretty enamored with the versatility of the bolo bow tie, and how is it that you could look so cute/pretty/lovely and man repelling at the same time? You sure work wonders.

    Also, love it how teaching the world how to work adjustable bow ties take priority over your mom's yoga class, haha.

    http://www.TheFancyTeacup.com
    much love.

  • Anonymous
  • chanest-ce que cette?

    AHAHAHAHAHA THE TWELVE TRIBES REFRENCE THEN GALLIANO HAD ME LAUGHING SOO HARD, k im gunna get a life. love your blog!

  • Anonymous

    you so lucky for many reasons… one of them is having such a cool mom!!!
    love you and your blog soooo much

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/15267752943634181709 Luxe1968

    Extreme cuteness!!! You're way too adorable.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/02972286042128418211 Bridget Colella
  • Anonymous

    loooove ths bowotiw!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/02756585515065845268 Aubrey and Melissa

    Seriously, so cute.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/13791227300223171243 I Live For It

    This comment has been removed by the author.

  • Anonymous

    I have been waiting for my favorite Jewish blogger to take a stab at Galliano!

    p.s. you are my girl crush

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/14876642970706930637 Mariel Villanueva

    Hilarious. Love the tips. Made my day, as usual. Thanks!

  • http://www.twitter.com/danielledouglas danielle

    my heart just broke in a million pieces. i traded my coachella ticket for a trip to NYC and straight to TEN I SEE for bonnaroo… i shoulda trusted my MR instinct… good news is i can steal all your great fit ideas. nothing says man repeller like a dirty drunk & unbathed fashionista

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/09107020790081231747 Bárbara Cunha

    hi ! love your post ! your blog is great !!! following you. follow back ?

    xoxo

    bárbara
    afigurinista.blogspot.com

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/16360161157613457921 Anet

    it seems, like blugirl style)

    http://style-of-living.blogspot.com

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/11710285432806200405 Lux
  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/17316550257909201300 Lindsey

    Love the bow tie/ as head band!

    Follow me on bloglovin!
    the-glitz-blog.blogspot.com

  • http://universeandyou.wordpress.com/ Ellen Kaminagakura

    Amazing outfits with the bow tie !

    I just love it! Not because you are wearing a bow tie that means that you must wear just tailoring ?!

    Not that I don't like, just the other way I just think that tailoring with bow tie is amazing!

    And there is so many runaway shows this fall can prove that! I posted about it! And like I said PUT YOUR MUSTACHE ON and go for male tuxedo!

    http://universeandyou.wordpress.com/2011/03/01/put-your-mustache-on/

    Xoxo.

  • Anonymous

    Man Repeller! my friend in NZ makes these amazing pieces called bedrock bones (total lady bone-er)haha you should check them out, get into the NZ love http://www.rubyboutique.co.nz/Articles/fashions/15/427/Bedrock%20Bones.aspx

    love fran from NZ

  • Anonymous

    manrepeller i purchased one of these bad boys yesterday! thanks for the hot tip, I look forward to getting my bow bolo on.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/12803597155110452257 Kerrin

    this post absolutely made my day for too many reasons to list. THANK YOU!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/14222629783598536990 Midge

    Bow-lo tie. Love it.

    WastedWardrobe.net

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/00089522720183541741 kundalini

    DUDE YOUR GOING TO COACHELLA!I would give my left boob to go there!? It's things like this which make me despise being a poor high school student from georgia. Have fun and take lots of pics.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/08847440156597573731 Cate

    is it bad that i actually really love this? :)

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/14870866601660892910 jhuynh

    hahaha is it awkward editing photos of yourself all the time? you're a pro in front of then lens now i must say! i swear to god your posts get funnier

    http://indiaandfen.blogspot.com/

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/07402619672119377705 Villedela

    This. Is. Great. Obviously love the final look with the bowtie-in-the-hair bit. Fantastic.

  • http://www.daydreamincolor.com Connie

    Love this look! I've linked to this post in my Daydream in Bow Ties post: http://www.daydreamincolor.com/?p=348

  • Anonymous

    love the red pant look! xo