Beauty Trends that Nip His Tip
I haven’t yet delved too deep into the beauty department, give or take a post about red lipstick of two. This is likely because I don’t wear much make up. And unfortunately for me, this is something a penis can get behind. You see, when it comes to matters of the face, my repelling skills are off.
Actually I take that back. Just last Saturday night I was enjoying myself some fish tacos when the man on the other end of the table said “the bags under your eyes look huge when you don’t wear black makeup over your eyes.” Sue me, world. I didn’t feel like looking like Alexa Chung that night. Weird, I know. That’s not the real reason. It’s because I hate the process of taking my makeup off before going to sleep and so I figured, no makeup? No problem.
I digress. In a tweet I composed and sent a couple of weeks ago, I said: Next up on The Man Repeller: Beauty trends that nip his tip. Discuss. The response was neat and from it I learned, blackberry lipstick leaves one looking like a. she has gangrene, b. is frostbite ridden. (Via @toomanyronis.) c. may subscribe to the Vampire way o’living. (Via @ppirapokin.)
And so today, I wear black lipstick.
Who What Wear recognized and exploited the trend as early as 2009 so they get a high five and some gangrene in the lookbook of my life. I can’t help but think Willy Wonka and his nifty Chocolate Factory. I’m not sure why. Can someone help me work this out?
@GlamKitten88 said: Bright red lips scare my fiance. He doesn’t want my lips anywhere near him because he will get red lip prints.
And to that we say, fiance? Run for the hills, woman. Just kidding. If the man shoe fits, lock him wear it.
We’ve already investigated the ambiguous nature of red lipstick and the general consensus is that it is both a repeller and a propeller. Good to know your fiance hates it and doesn’t want its sweet trace around him, though.
@BeautyHigh suggested that when speaking of dick deflecting beauty trends, we delve into the fascinating world of bleached brows. @FuschiaPR shared a similar sentiment, with a link. “Invisible eyebrows! http://bit.ly/gIoJhj but surely they’re the only way to emphasize your lip colour of choice this season!”
…Cue Yves Saint Laurent S/S 2011. Where eyebrows were out, lips were in. Look, I’m not one to voluntarily mask my eyebrows, but If YSL says it’s a go, I’m on the Jolene train.
And while we’re talking eyeballs, RT @ToVogueorBust Yellow eyeliner for sure.
…Who doesn’t want little taxi cabs driving atop their lids? That’s the real question here.
Here’s one I’m contributing on my own with a little help from my friend, @BarneysNY: men hate lip glass. Period.
…Not the sticky business he had in mind.
Now I defer to you, fellow repellows. What does your man friend hate? I use the term man friend loosely, he could be, nay, should be, your dad or brother.
And this one is for Rosie: Titular.