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Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Beauty Trends that Nip His Tip

Ombre lips, so fancy.
I haven't yet delved too deep into the beauty department, give or take a post about red lipstick of two. This is likely because I don't wear much make up. And unfortunately for me, this is something a penis can get behind. You see, when it comes to matters of the face, my repelling skills are off.

Actually I take that back. Just last Saturday night I was enjoying myself some fish tacos when the man on the other end of the table said "the bags under your eyes look huge when you don't wear black makeup over your eyes." Sue me, world. I didn't feel like looking like Alexa Chung that night. Weird, I know. That's not the real reason. It's because I hate the process of taking my makeup off before going to sleep and so I figured, no makeup? No problem.

I digress. In a tweet I composed and sent a couple of weeks ago, I said: Next up on The Man Repeller: Beauty trends that nip his tip. Discuss. The response was neat and from it I learned, blackberry lipstick leaves one looking like a. she has gangrene, b. is frostbite ridden. (Via @toomanyronis.) c. may subscribe to the Vampire way o'living. (Via @ppirapokin.)  

And so today, I wear black lipstick. 
Who What Wear recognized and exploited the trend as early as 2009 so they get a high five and some gangrene in the lookbook of my life. I can't help but think Willy Wonka and his nifty Chocolate Factory. I'm not sure why. Can someone help me work this out? 

@GlamKitten88 said: Bright red lips scare my fiance. He doesn't want my lips anywhere near him because he will get red lip prints.
And to that we say, fiance? Run for the hills, woman. Just kidding. If the man shoe fits, lock him wear it.
We've already investigated the ambiguous nature of red lipstick and the general consensus is that it is both a repeller and a propeller. Good to know your fiance hates it and doesn't want its sweet trace around him, though. 

@BeautyHigh suggested that when speaking of dick deflecting beauty trends, we delve into the fascinating world of bleached brows. @FuschiaPR shared a similar sentiment, with a link. "Invisible eyebrows! http://bit.ly/gIoJhj but surely they're the only way to emphasize your lip colour of choice this season!"
photos via StyleCaster
...Cue Yves Saint Laurent S/S 2011. Where eyebrows were out, lips were in. Look, I'm not one to voluntarily mask my eyebrows, but If YSL says it's a go, I'm on the Jolene train.

And while we're talking eyeballs, RT @ToVogueorBust Yellow eyeliner for sure.
...Who doesn't want little taxi cabs driving atop their lids? That's the real question here.

Here's one I'm contributing on my own with a little help from my friend, @BarneysNY: men hate lip glass. Period.
 via Lancome
via Mac
...Not the sticky business he had in mind.
Now I defer to you, fellow repellows. What does your man friend hate? I use the term man friend loosely, he could be, nay, should be, your dad or brother. 

And this one is for Rosie: Titular.

74 comments:

  1. ...Who doesn't want little taxi cabs living atop their lids?

    OMG, I'm still laughing. And strangely tempted to go to the nearest MAC store and buy canary yellow eyeshadow.

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  2. Ah, well luckily for me my eyebrows are nearly invisible as is. My hair has darkened from my towheaded youth but my eyebrows have stubbornly claimed to be Scandinavian when in fact I'm nothing but a Irish mutt. Blackberry lipstick is all I need to be on trend this time.

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  4. I love this post. I don't think my boy could ever get over my wearing of a colored lipstick that is basically any other color than my own lips. Men are so picky!

    x

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  5. your blog is too funny, love this post!!

    http://lavie-amonavis.blogspot.com

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  6. I'm a firm believer that whatever is underneath my layers of makeup would repel men more than the makeup caked over it. Acne is a dick-deflecter, for sure. Alas, the makeup that I wear repels, too ("you have too much makeup on, can't you look more natural?" No. I don't want to look natural. I want to wear bright green eyeliner with purple eyeshadow, and you can't tell me not to), so it's a win/win for me!

    www.fivethingsfirst.blogspot.com

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  7. what about WEIRD COLORED EYE SHADOW

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  8. I'm not a lip gloss wearer but these colors look cool.

    www.fashionablecollections.blogspot.com

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  9. LOL you are so right about the lip glass!

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  10. If you are looking for a non sticky lip gloss, try Lip Bliss by What's your Virtue. It stays on forever and its not sticky or tacky. Love this!!

    www.whatsyourvirtue.com

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  11. My slampiece ABHORS black lipstick- he thinks it just screams tragic goth, but I beg to differ ;D I'm also well in love with my indigo and charcoal grey lip pigment- both equally frustrating to him :P

    As much as this screams faux pas, I shave my eyebrows off + draw them on. I have blue hair + it's the easiest way to have matching brows- I've been doing it since I started wearing makeup, but I've still been begged to grow my brow caterpillars back out again :P

    He also has an apparent abhorrence of drop crotch pants, but he's going to have to live. I just upcycled a pair from old tights + they're simply marvy ;D

    http://tentaclesandteacups.blogspot.com

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  12. maybe they hate lip glass but mine loves the dior kiss lip gloss in my weapon of choice flavor: mango soda. which of course combines two obvious long lost flavor friends....mango and.... soda? anyway as long as its not globbed on, just enough for a lil flavor, its a penis propeller.

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  13. love blackberry and coral lips at the moment!

    january, x
    jessicajanuary.com

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  14. i'm not a big makeup girl either, but these looks are pretty cool. i am a fan of the red lip though, thats about all i wear.

    http://wordbyjessie.com

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  15. My boyfriend is far too terrified of my reaction to ever blatantly tell me he doesn't like part of my look. But oddly, I do happen to know that he hates 'out there' nail polish colors like bold greens, blues, yellows etc.. He thinks I should exclusively wear red/pink or nothing-- and that those other colors are better suited on my 7 year old niece. It's pretty rude. But don't worry MR, I'm currently wearing Lapis Of Luxury by essie. He'll have to deal.

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  16. What Jessie said... I rarely wear lipstick but those ombre lips are trriiiipppyyyy! I do need to get me some yellow eyeliner though, mmhmm.

    Cheers!
    --Megan//themartiantide.blogspot.com

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  17. My fiance hates lipstick and any kind of lip gloss. Sorry, it comes with the package baby.

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  18. 1. guys definitely hate lip glass.
    2. lipstick of any bold or bright color scares them. even if i insist to my boyfriend that the red lipstick won't transfer, he still pulls away like i've got a huge cold sore or a viral infection.
    3. every time i wear red or pink lipstick my girlfriends say "i love it". my guy friends (as your under eye bag hating friend did) will blatantly say "you look weird, i don't like it".

    and so, i mostly wear chapstick, i wear lipstick because i do what i want, but if i'm trying to get smooches from the bf, i lay off the lipglass.
    http://indieelectronicalternative.blogspot.com/

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  19. my hubby likes my sense of beauty. i wear bubble gum pink lipstick to shadow. he says my face is my art canvas! lucky for me. i do not repell my hubby with fashion or beauty,i draw him in. he says no man has a wife like his! LOVE HIM!

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  20. I don't own any lipstick or anything, but I do slather on vanilla chapstick. My boyfriend loves it. He definitely hates makeup though and even comments on girls that I think look really pretty - "Ugh, she's wearing so much makeup, she looks gross". He also HATES thick straight across bangs, bandeau swimsuits and dresses, and cowboy boots with dresses. It's pretty funny how often he comments on those three things, actually.

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  21. wow, everyone seems surrounded by men with very strong opinions on makeup. My manfriend (read: husband) actually likes bright lipstick on me (though I'll admit it doesn't happen often, maybe it's the novelty of it) and fun nail polish colors. Lip gloss will make him avoid kissing me, but I think that's more because he doesn't like wearing it himself, which makes sense. The only thing that offends him deeply is spidery overly mascara-ed lashes.

    http://nomadic-d.blogspot.com/

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  22. When wearing my deep blackberry lipstick at a bar, a male friend of mine said to me...

    "That lipstick makes you look like you're dead".

    JUST the look I was going for.

    Kendra

    http://myfashion-inspiration.blogspot.com/

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  23. chanel paris is my natural lip colour. i don't even think the boys notice it anymore.

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  24. Ahh the male's perspective on makeup is always worth a laugh, and disregarding altogether. They don't know what they like. They claim they like "all naturale" but then ogle women, models, and celebrities in full makeup. For the most part, men just think women just happen to look that attractive, not understanding the effort or steps involved in the process of looking "natural" or "pretty." I know they don't enjoy makeup rubbing off on them, and that's understandable. But when it comes to makeup, I say wear what you love and what inspires you. It's only makeup, it's not a tattoo! Have fun with it!

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  25. Glitter. Lots and lots of glitter. It gets on everything the minute it gets within an inch of it. I've never seen anything repel better.

    Also,

    Super heavy drag queen eyebrows.

    Finally, Shu Umera's lashes. there is nothing like attaching peacock feathers to your face to make a man throw up a little in his mouth.

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  26. Fake eyelashes. I wore them one night to a Christmas party, and the bf couldn't figure out what was "different" about me. When we got home, I asked him if he wanted to watch the hottest striptease ever and proceeded to rip the fake lashes off my eyes. He said, "Baby, would you please never do that again?"

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  27. that guy is hilarious. OH men... what would we do without them

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  28. The man who is lucky enough to be in my life (his words, but I do agree ;) ) says the same about fake eyelashes and sticky gloss, but loves the red because it's one of his favorite colors, but he also thinks I look just as good without makeup on. I still wear whatever I want regardless.

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  29. my boyfriend hates anything that he notices on my lips! whether its lip gloos or lipstick; lipbalms okay though! also prefers when i dont wear make up - naturally beautiful i guess! Naaat.

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  30. very great post! maybe a little bit crazy ideas for today's people, but very inspirational!

    http://sheisfashionholic.blogspot.com/

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  31. i can't even wear blistex, basically anything on my lips cause he thinks it feels greasy!

    http://kc-citystyle.blogspot.com/

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  32. My lip plumping lip gloss. It burns my man friend's lips. My cg bigelow lipgloss with mentha in it does the trick too. Men also don't like crazy 80's eyeshadow colors. Think neons.
    My Heart Blogged

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  33. The list of things my bf likes is significantly shorter than the things he doesn't like. He hates: heels- especially wedges which he calls "goats feet," lipstick/gloss, heavy eye makeup (and by heavy I mean eyeliner), straight-cut bangs, perfume, and most printed anything. #Can'tWin

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  34. lipgloss and that nice big orange line on the side of your jaw when you don't rub your makeup in properly.
    taxi cabs + eyelids = win situation
    though placing actual cabs on eyelids is probably not a great idea x

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  35. Here comes an invitation to take part at my giveaway, darling. Hope you will ;)
    Click here to take part

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  36. I live of beauty repelling hence I'm single. But most of my male friends complain about when girl's wear extreme falsies for no special occasion i.e. batwings and blue fringe.

    -xo
    Bobbie

    www.confessionsofacouturejunkie.com

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  37. Fast ride from Nars is a killer lipstick deep grape & sheer lovin' it and really sometimes i love my lipstick so much that I don't want to share it with anyone! (and it helps to stay on longer ! who need a 16hours lipstick if you do not kiss)
    16 hours lipstick can be a good repeller !??

    x Dorothee

    www.desperatelyseekingpegase.blogspot.com

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  38. I think my man would run for the hills if I had lemon lids. And disappearing eyebrows. Haha, truly man repelling indeed. Although he might fancy the ombre lips...

    www.TheFancyTeacup.com
    much love.

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  39. lol men also hate when you have straight glossy hair. many ive talked to likes the waves or curls.

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  40. fabulous makeup, loved these deep purple lips

    http://elenavasilieva.blogspot.com/
    x

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  41. Likely reason you're thinking of the Chocolate Factory is perhaps due to Violet, the girl who turned into a blueberry?

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  42. My husband would hate all of the above lipcoverings. He also hates baggy clothes - even blousy blouses. He likes it to all be form fitting. I try to compromise.

    - Meredith
    www.findingsoulbalance.blogspot.com

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  43. Bedazzled nails/nail jewelry. Thick drawn on eyebrows. Lip liner drawn way outside of natural lips. Glitter.

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  44. leandra! oddsicles how i painted my lips berry berry fuschia today, the berry day that you reference the kryptonite of the labido , blackberry lip tint-astic color ... and am honored, scratch that ...i am TITILATED at the mere utterance of my name on ce blog!

    xx rorororooossie

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  45. Only a fool who wanted to take his life in his hands would dare criticize my bright red lipstick.

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  46. yellow eyeliner?!?! yesyesyes.

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  47. Glitter,they hate it because they get covered in it,somehow they don't dig the fairy princess look.Still nothing in the world funnier than seen a grown man post glitter encounter walking down the street glimmering like a disco ball.

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  48. My man friend hates when I wear a topknot. I enjoy feeling like a chic extraterrestrial, sue me.

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  49. Definitely lip gloss. Whenever he unwittingly kisses me while I'm wearing it, he pulls back, grimaces, and then proceeds to ask "Why didn't you tell me you had that shit on your lips?" or just mutters "gross." Ahhh love. I consider it payback for taking a lackadaisical view on shaving. If I have to deal with face pubes scratching me than he has to deal with shit on his lips. And that isn't code for some sick kinky sex.

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  50. two words: blue eyeliner. But who doesn't get sick of looking like a panda on date nights. On the other side, fuchsia lipstick. Every time I wear it I feel like I should be on Dynasty but every time I wear it I, apparently, look like I just walked off the set of...Dynasty...

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  51. I had a former boyfriend tell me he didn't like it when I wore a beige bra. Beige undergarments it is!

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  52. Nail polishers. They are huge man repellers!!! I love my chanel black pearl...not exactly a man magnet.

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  53. beautiful lips


    http://pinklemonincrystal.blogspot.com

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  54. Nail polish! My boyfriend hates it with a fiery passion. :) Luckily he's slowly becoming indifferent. :D

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  55. My man LOARTHES ( in no particular order of signifficance)
    Lip gloss - definitely shrinks his dink,
    Wide belts a pretty much a guarantee of a lonely night,
    Tunics+Leggings will leave me my labia lonely,
    chunky heels bring me no man thrills.

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  56. My man HATES it when I wear red/dark lipsticks.. the trick is to give him many kisses before. Then I'm "off-limits" ;)

    http://mouthmotions.blogspot.com/

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  57. my boyfriend hates lipstick and lipgloss! because he cant kiss me because it will ruin everything, but that dark lipstick is a woman repeller, i am afraid of it, it looks too severe!.... red is sexy.. only if it is not smudged and with proper eye makeup.. you could easily look like a hoo

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  58. The yellow eye liner is absolutely gorgeous!! Anyway whenever I wear light foundation my man friends say to me that I look like a vampire!!

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  59. no make-up at all is a huge repeller - he LOVES bright red lips, fake lashes, he especially loves lip gloss and was like, 'is it possible to do nice red lips with all the shiny stuff, you would look so beautiful'. I said, 'yeah but then it would be hard to kiss you', and he said, 'ok but can you do it for when we go out some time' (cause we don't do PDA but he loves showing me off)... basically my man repelling would be the opposite of this post

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  60. my men friends hate when i paint my nails alternating colors, and they really hate bright pop-art nail colors.

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  61. My boyfriend uses my Burt's Bees (particularly fond of the pomegranate flavourway). He also requests my Body Shop Born Lippy in strawberry for himself. Because he applies it like a caveman, I am then on duty to make sure the greasy look doesn't permeate across the lip/skin border.

    He hates red lipstick (so, I wear red lipstick). He hates Chanel No. 5. To be fair, it's not my scent anyway, Mum just bought it for me after a trip to Paris and I had to use it up.

    He hates it when I wear black polish with OPI Burlesque gold tips because "they look like sandpaper".

    Cry me a freaking river.

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  62. One day, my fiance complimented me on my makeup, but followed that up by saying he loves how I look without makeup on, too. I quickly told him that that was a good thing - since I sure as hell wasn't going to doll up my face for him everyday. :P

    I tend to wear very little lipstick, so he's learned to not fear me kissing him with makeup on. He just hates lip glosses that are really sticky... but so do I, so I'm not likely to wear them.

    I'm kind of bi-polar when it comes to makeup. I generally like wearing as little as possible and focusing my talent where it counts - really intense eye-makeup or a nice lip color. Other days, I attack my face with eye-liner and just see what happens. It's fun, creative, and goes away with a simple wipe-up if I don't like the end result.

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  63. i hate lipgloss and so does my man but we do like red lipstain

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  64. I have a smashing man repeller, get old, seriously it works wonders.

    Loved your blog and this post :)

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  65. im glad i came across this, good to know im not the only one that has to avoid the gloss.

    even if im wearing something like chapstick or just the Vaseline aloe vera lip therapy tins so its not even about the fancy sticky beauty lip gloss but even the medicated stuff for dry lips, he makes me wipe it off with my hand/arm before kissing him and he whinges at me if i dont and if he kisses me with it on he makes a face...

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  66. I really want to try the yellow eyeliner.

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