Obligatory disclaimer: No animals were skinned, hurt and/or harmed in the making of this blog post.
During winter months it becomes particularly difficult to maintain one’s man repelling flair. We instead venture into the territory of human repelling: sleeping bag inspired down coats, Fuggs, layers of hot chili thermals…there has to be a better way.
And alas, there is. While I appreciate and understand why many reprimand the use of fur, it may perhaps be the only way to stay street style savvy through the season.
Not going to neglect the elephant in this room, oh no. Kate Moss’s wrist looks like a dead fish.
Lucky for PETA Propellers, this season has been big on the faux and for those uninterested in preserving the lives of little baby animals…I’m so sorry, PETA. I think what you’re doing is great. Mongolian fur doesn’t hurt animals and whatever other fur I own is vintage, the animal would have died of old age…I swear are you sick? Either way, strap on what you’ve got and become the lion of Scott Schuman’s eye in six simple steps.
Step 1: Let the
reserved white swan within fly free north of your legs. I stole this blouse from the
Semi-Repeller herself.
Step 2: Introduce Chuck the Cheetah to your baby swan and trouser pants. Hand on waist formation optional but highly recommended.
second vest: Kookai
Step 3: Add another vest. As Man Repellers, layering is our forte. As human beings, staying warm is our instinct. See how this is working out? The two worlds collide so perfectly.
Knit garbage bag featuring Mongolian fur trim: Carolina Herrera
Step 4: Hold your horses, judgmental Jerry. This Carolina Herrera shaggy dog does not belong to me. It’s my ma’s. She bought it when my father wasn’t looking. And that shit is non-returnable. [Insert sigh of relief here.]
fur scarf: Dennis Basso a la my mother once again, JUDGMENTAL JERRY.
Step 5: Include a furry scarf. Try not to choke. We’ve thus far layered four fur separates to recreate what we can–in just one more step–refer to as a street style photographer’s winter wet dream come true going forward.
We can also call it: Rachel Zoe Legit.
hat: Vintage
Step 6: Finally, add what the yeshiva aesthetic refers to as a “Streimel,” but what we will call: “a fur hat.” Yackity yack, chuckle, chuck, slapping my knee and I just can’t stop. Is it a bird? It is it a bear? Is it an overweight deer? No, no. It’s a man repeller and she’s g g g getting photo’ed in 5…4…3…2…snappy, snappy. Clicky, click!
…Or you can just buy Chanel’s grizzly suit. It should be on sale by now. Your call.
For a quick recap including all six steps in two coherent images that tell a story called The Many Faces of MR, see below.
Wasn’t that just the most? Stay toasty!
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