Here’s to a Different Kind of Mullet

December 21, 2010
image via Fast Fancy Dress. You had me at fancy.

If you followed me on twitter, you’d know that I often tweet one liners like, “give me a mullet and I will wear it.” What you wouldn’t know though, is that contrary to what the above photo may suggest, I’m not necessarily talking about a mullet for my head. I am however, growing a goatee out.

The mullet is versatile and evokes many an optical illusion because of its’ dual nature: business in the front, party in the back. And while in the traditional sense of the word, it refers to one very elegant hairdo–I urge each and everyone of you to try it out, send your photos, and tell of your human repelling tales–because I am the Man Repeller, I’ve turned it into something more distinctly sartorial, a good way to preserve your virginity if you will.

Some of the innovative comparisons are more obvious, like the mullet dress.

You see, just like a mullet: short in the front…long in the back. I’d argue that is more of a dyslexic mullet, though. Note the inherent business in the back, party in the front feel to it.

Other comparisons, however are more discreet. 
Here, I share with you a very different kind of mullet. One that has nothing to do with hair. Or your head. Or different lengths of hair on said head. Or dress. It likely can’t actually be identified as a mullet but since this is my blog I can paint it any color I want and today I choose to paint it a confused hue of heather gray. 

Sweater: Alexander Wang, Necklace: TOMTOM, Trousers: Kimberly Taylor, Booties: Opening Ceremony

Feast your eyes on the grandpa sweater of all grandpa sweaters a la Alejandro no Wang. Tell me you love my buttons, smile at my tired eyes and take your attention back to the silent mullet.  
…Grandpa in the front…

…Attacked by a vicious wolverine in the back!
 See that? See that? A different kind of mullet. A silent one. With super slashing powers.

Speaking of slashing, this could, by the way, also make for a great DIY titled Slashin’ in Fashion. I’d suggest you use the edges of a very sharp necklace, one not unlike mine, to add a little zest to the nature of your DIY.

And back to the sweater, here’s a look at the front and back against each other:

 all images via Naomi Shon

I know what you’re thinking and yes, I’ve had those moles checked out.

Just kidding, you were thinking, “but Man Repeller, I can see your whole back, that won’t sink the banana boat,” right? Wrong. That lace American Apparel bra is the innerwear equivalent of floral print tencel drop crotch capris adorned by excessive Mongolian fur, pony-hair and smoked Gouda cheese. 

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/00217969062402167859 Kate

    Lol. You are brilliant your posts never fail to make me laugh! x

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/09739251167444138491 Fashion Agony

    Awesome!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/08125199704701967502 b. koral

    I call FOUL on the lacy bra. Your fancy talk can't cover up it's inherent sexiness. Sowwy!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/13837017099411059912 Katie

    I love the sweater but I'm drawn to how far you have your hands stuffed into your pant pockets?!!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/11824440493038509210 Vfriedrich

    I heart you X 10. Love, love, love the sweater and would totally rock it with a bra too. XO Valerie

    http://www.imstarvin.blogspot.com

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/10536244216664912207 Sketch42

    Did you actually go out like that today? I say that with no judgement based on looks, but werent you fucking cold? I can just imagine cold city winds going right up your back.

    Do you want to come teach me how to be an 7 mo pregnant man repeller? HA- fuck that- my actual body is a man repeller now.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/16747921195231684047 Francesca

    that sweater rocks and i want to wear a mullet to my wedding.

    xoxo,
    F

    Le Kiss Kiss-Click Here!!!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/04817350665810757667 Melissa

    yesssss i love me some mullet shirts! on the subject of business in the front, party in the back, i feel that "front-tucking" needs to be included in this lesson on man-repelling. front tucking is the best – it allows you to show off your skirt/pants/quilteddenimshortswithfeathers while covering up your booty so that it won't attract any unwanted attention. its amazing.

    love the blog!

    http://www.glamoretta.blogspot.com

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/04775667096221853862 Biaa

    I love your outfit!! Fantastic :) I love the mullet look as well, woot woot. Quick question: where's your lace bra from? I've been looking for the perfect one.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/08038761871346201630 Chicago Streestyle Scene

    Torn and shredded clothes, like Alexander Wang's Wolverine/Grandpa sweater, never fail to puzzle me. Even if they cost $1000s (I'm looking at you, hole-y Balmain tee shirt) they still look like DIY projects gone wrong. Thank you for bringing some sense back into fashion!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/16536746926281387283 fashioneggpplant

    I love your blog, hilarious but it makes sense. Very entertaining! follwed you on bloglovin'

    http://fashioneggplant.blogspot.com

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/16201027743434302014 Cameron and Cassie

    so funny I'm in love with this post!!
    http://idiedressed.blogspot.com/

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/13571647297447012840 Fabienne Jach

    I'd rock that mullet sweater. I love contradictory statements happening all at once.

  • http://fashionslap.net/ fashionslap.net

    Well hoorah you can go backless. If I were to do that it would look like poured out a container of curdled cheese…yum (Admit that just brought some hott thoughts to your head).

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/12347329353442093349 minkandcappuccino

    i love lily's style all the time
    anyways great post

    please visit/follow my blog & twitter if you'd like
    http://pinklemonincrystal.blogspot.com
    (interview with Kim Mesches, featuring BleuDame and holiday gift guides pt. 1 and 2 uploaded!!)
    twitter @divalicious_m

  • http://mamawearsprada.com gracekillah

    I love the business in the front and party in the back.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/00950123284698606074 Death By Shoe

    Haha I always like a good mullet, no matter where or in what form it may be :)

    PS. Your blog is seriously making people at work think I'm crazy with all my random, hysterical laughing.

    -Danielle

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/12409349993237822576 Snow Black

    I love your mullet comparison to fashion. Let's just say there was a Russian kid with a major mullet going on when I was at the airport in Moscow

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/06687132729093593095 young-shields

    I don't know how, but I've only discovered you recently, Man Repeller. Jokes aside, your writing style is so, so good. And, of course, your handy tips for man repelling.

    Claire @ young-shields

  • http://www.thingsonhangers.com Taylor

    Gah, I love your blog. And I loved that sweater, I almost bought the crop top version of it myself (I'm kicking myself for not). Your necklace is great too.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/18079451697246008667 Montana

    Where have you been all my life (rhetorical question)!

    http://www.wanderloveblog.blogspot.com

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/07402619672119377705 Villedela

    Business in the front, party in the back. always. I love that Pucci dress– gorgeous.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/00150728682137531165 Straight Up Style

    You are, as ever, hilarious! It's really nice to read a blog that's so hilarious and has a fresh take on fashion.

    Devora

    http://www.straightupstyle.blogspot.com

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/02461471306904999222 goth reform school

    oh hello future wedding dress.

    and the cardigan is mad good.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/05345225002773583958 Sabina

    I'm actually a big fan of mullet dresses! I don't know if they repel, but I like how they make people go huh, much like the haircut used to before it was taken over by hipsters, along with the "pornstaches" of '07.

    P.S. Great writeup in the Times, by the way.

    http://mystylecanvas.blogspot.com

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/10707735870551760491 Made

    meh. That sweater is a little *too* Miley Cyrus. I guess that makes it a twice-baked mullet? Mullet squared?

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/11877704206461663448 Olya

    Love your post! your are so cool! xx

  • http://www.escortsandthecity.co.uk London Escorts

    Great pictures, we like :-)
    London Escorts

  • http://www.itchair.com/seo-los-angeles/ seo los angeles

    I didn't even notice those moles until you pointed them out! That's amazing though, I would attempt this with one of my many grandpa sweaters, but I'm pretty sure it wouldn't work out that well…maybe I'll find one at a vintage store and see if I can work some magic on it.