Breaking Down the Business Suit

Initially I intended for the following post to serve as another lesson in turning the below Man Getting bustier

…into a Man Repeller. Couch sprawl and serene wave painting not included.

But then I changed my mind and since this is my blog I can paint it any color I want. Today I choose to paint it pin stripe navy. In the last couple months I’ve seen a stray from ladies-of-the-50s-silhouettes and a resurgence of the “borrowed from the boys” trend. This time however, with an innovative twist: swap out boy for banker and behold, we’re wearing business suits like Goldman Sachs is going out o’style!

I often joke that I only date bankers, cue the Foxes of Finance. I get a real kick out of feeding into naive stereotypes about the ladies of fashion and the men they bone. This is no longer a joke, however. Never did I ever think I’d take style cues from the pack of men that crowd the 7AM six train but I’m wearing a sign that reads: will trade companionship for business suit, preferably on skinny boylike man. CC: Deal Breaker. I fear finding “companionship” may prove difficult, as I’m clad in lime green trouser pants and bright purple sweater at the moment but, to each their own.

Now however, let’s dip into the photographic proof that confirms it: fashions most recent source of inspiration has come from the fellows of Wall Street.

Yesterday, Harper’s Bazaar blogged about Olivia Wilde and Leighton Meester’s recent red carpet decisions to rock the business rags.

Leighton’s wearing a suit from Thom Browne’s first womenswear collection. Let’s address the elephant in my pants, ok? That’s not womenswear, Thom. In any case, this post in turn reminded of a bit I read on Trish Goff weeks earlier. 

On a recent trip to New York, Goff ran out of clothing before a black tie event so did what any woman would do in that situation and opted to borrow a mens tuxedo. Evidently, gowns are soOoOo 2009. 

Then I came upon an article dedicated to the very same concept brought forth right here.

Menswear is a good look for Winona. It provides ample space to hide the goods her five finger discounts  afford her. Too soon? Too late?

And because it would be just wrong to leave Chloe Sevigny out of this post…Ladies, let your boners erect and men…dispatch.

Hair pulled back so tightly, an elaborate ascot and satin suspenders almost detract from the mere fact that her pants are so high waisted she may be able to tuck her breasts into them. FUPA should be renamed CSFS: Chloe Sevigny Fatgina Syndrome. Nevertheless, I’d go gay for C. Maybe.

Finally, we swing back to the first photo and The Man Repeller version of that Getter. While these photos were taken months ago, it only recently dawned on me that as the bustier Repeller, sartorial cues came directly from men who love equity.

I’m a hip investment banker, though you see. Because I wear fur. Say hello to my statue. Please and thanks. And for the record, the shoes and shirt are stolen from a real life banker who has a calculator for a brain. I use him for his cool clothes and wizard-like tech talents from time to time.

Wear his your business suits proud this weekend, fellow repellows.
Love,
Me