Trend Spotting: Birth Control Glasses

by Leandra Medine
October 13, 2010
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Birth control glasses have been on the up for a solid three years now but because it’s only been six months since I’ve properly identified most of the fashion trends we lurve as Man Repellers I’ve been forced to deliver a delayed trend spotting piece on thick framed eye-glasses, which will be referred to as BCGs going forward.

When I leave my home I question the motivation behind my wearing them. I have a minor lazy eye so technically, I don’t even really need glasses. Confession! I lied to my mom three years ago and told her my eyes were hurting so she would take me to the eye doctor. We went to the doctor. He was obviously something of a dishonest doctor because my eyeballs were fine but he told me I needed new specs, what a thief! I was thrilled.

Now let’s dissect the trend, extra douche bag points for specs un-prescripted. Taking a small cue from the street style blogs that crowd my browser, behold:

Ankle socks, sandals, neons, camel coat, cinnabun, BCGs. She’s likely on the phone explaining to her gynecologist that at the moment, a check up is unnecessary.

Glasses aside, do note the layered chains across to her blazer. I’m sure there’s some sort of clasp to remove them but it’s funnier to imagine her struggling to take her jacket off because she’s trapped inside her chains.

A good lesson in learning to channel Grease Lightning and the Pink Ladies with just your eyes.

 

Call me crazy, but it’s pretty sunny behind you, girlfriend. Unnecessary umbrella use. Can I say the same about your frame-use?

 image via Mr. Newton

I love Julia Frakes because she wears Mochilla-weavings better than Mexicans do. This photo doesn’t represent that, though. Take a cue from her BCGs.

 image via Mr. Newton

Knit neck brace, mushroom hat and bifauxcals–just kidding, I don’t know if they’re faux, but girlfriend, your labia must be lonely. On the bright side, I have a lady boner.

 Ahuh. image via Mr. Newton

Now, I can think of the vast rebuttals you may be conjuring up:
“What about the sexy librarian.”
“Guys love hot nerds.”
“Good for role-playing.”‘
But no, you’re wrong. And I have photographic proof:

SEE!

I’m not suggesting you stop wearing them, but what I am saying is: they may slow down the mating process. 

And in case you’re wondering, re: getting choked, I’m fine.

REPLIES
  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/18225298040349571173 Michelle Bobb-Parris

    AAAHHH!!! Another excellent post (not just cuz a couple of my shots feature therein). I am wearing some BCGs right now. I am also single. Connection? Duh…

    I need those Oakley glasses at the top in my life. Always gotta have backup.

  • Anonymous

    I've been cursed since glasses since I was 8 (astigmatism keeps me from switching to contacts), and it always pisses me off when I see people wearing frames without lenses or non-prescription ones.

    Bitches, please. If you had to wear this shit to watch TV (or see the monitor I'm typing into) you wouldn't find them so cute or quirky. More of a huge annoyance than a fashion accessory.

  • http://abetterroni.blogspot.com A BETTER RONI

    This is a great one. A very great job Man Repeller. xx

  • Anonymous

    You're awesomely funny.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/14566848305217052617 I type to sound busy

    Sad fact: I completely agree with the comment about if you have to wear glasses you feel like its a total curse and wouldn't be caught dead wearing the fake ones. And it's just jealous-inducing when others pretend to have bad eyesight.

    Reality: I got lasik a year ago. I wear fake wayfarers every once in a while because they accessorize well with my outfit. Life Fail but Man Repeller Win I suppose!

  • Gabriela

    This is going to be an annoying comment, but I had to say it: Navajo? Not Mexican. More like Arizona, U.S. Other than that, awesome blog.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/03401686887977484323 Man Repeller

    @Gabriela YOU'RE SO RIGHT. Fixed.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/12016423757664732777 Ginta

    Soooo true :)
    I was jumping form joy when last year I noticed my eyesight is getting worse & worse. And then came the happy day I got my BCG! And now my life is totally men free :)

  • http://thoseextra4inches.com casey

    I've secretly always wanted poor eyesight so I could don a pair of BCG as well #fashiongirlproblems

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/15318966183032998930 Melissa

    I dunno I hav ebeen wearing specs since the tender age of nine and that was 23 years ago. Although sometimes i wish wish wish I didn't need to I am hardly bitter about people liking them as an accessory. I think glasses can be fabulous, with or without the prescription…but maybe I say that because I can also wear contacts (yes even with astigmatism) when I so choose.

    Regarding the post, I heart it and those tortoise shell cats eye frames have been on my to-get list for a couple months!

  • Maura

    Love it! This is the only thing I read that makes me belly-laugh-out-loud EVERYDAY!!!!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/12017059379087950164 i want what she’s wearing

    haha awesome post as usual. Perhaps the girl with the umbrella was avoiding a glasses tan?

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/10934189825591594460 ooh-lalà

    AHAHAHA i love your blog. great!

  • http://iamronel.com iamronel

    those are great

  • http://ronelmarin.net ronelmarin.net

    these great..love em

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/11996586138995842555 Moito

    Again, great post, funny writing, but once again, I think you look great with glasses (some women really look stunning in glasses) :)

  • Anonymous

    you are funny like hell. not to mention you are beautiful. you intimidate men

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/13248457257839392171 Nuit

    LOL awesome post!!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/11116159240551211750 vivalablonda

    This is greaaaaaaaat! and the glasses are awesome!

  • Anonymous

    Umm… Your rebuttals are entirely valid and have been proven again and again. I get the sense that you realized how brilliantly they contradicted your post and that's why you included them. Nevertheless the final picture was a valiant effort at supporting your thesis. But ask any hetero. man what he thinks of glasses on a pretty girl and/or just watch porn and take notes.

  • Anonymous

    I wear glasses occasionally, mainly to drive. I can't see well past 3mtrs.
    Every time I put them on my boyfriend tries to hump me, is this normal?

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/10580036482104197758 “Vishí e Puà”

    Just landed on your blog! It's funny and very interesting! Thanks for finding my favourite glasses.I adore the Oak NYC ones!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/17351701935850974219 Ashley [Free Honey]

    You know what they say: boys don't make passes at girls who wear glasses!

  • Anonymous

    another awesome post!!!

  • Anonymous

    you go girl…. how brilliant are you

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/07531459158506106667 THE DIVINITUS

    he he, funny finale :)

  • chopinboard

    hey, i dint know i am wearing one! after my recent break up, i went into a clinic and by instinct, picked this up. it loves my face and people love it, thinking it's fake. but these specs do help me see the real thing :O

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/09667142332264503375 paula

    I'm leaning in close to read this blog… time to buy some BCG me thinks!!!

  • http://www.opticbrights.com/home.cfm Carey Ellis

    Your sort is great. What a fashion trends. The Birth control glasses is amazing. I want to purchase that one soon. Thank you for the information and keep it up.

  • http://lifeinleopardprint.wordpress.com/ lifeinleopardprint

    you know the old saying….
    'Boy's don't make passes at girl's that wear glasses'
    it's very true for all the above haha

  • http://theeuropeanmind.tumblr.com The European Mind

    Check out Selima Optique's stores downtown. She makes rad frames and is French. It would match your fetish. http://selimaoptique.com/

  • Anonymous

    You are wrong. When you are a lady of 'a certain age' and of artistic sensibilities, a good pair of BCGs are actually effective attractants. They hide your crows feet, this taking 10 years off a well-lived life, and they weed out the creeps/douchebags/corporate-lemming-men.

    I've had glasses since I was 8. Wear contacts too, but my BCBs a are social magnet.

    Love your site!

  • pulsa online

    those are great…. http://jasapulsa.co.id

  • http://indoneka.com/aksesoris_mobil/ rudi
  • umar

    keren banget, apalagi di tambah dengan asesoris yang pas http://umarilmi.blogspot.com

  • Ruki Hiroshii

    AHAHAHA i love your blog. great!

    Klik disini aja
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  • rudi

    wow .. This is the most beautiful performance I have ever seen as my website http://www.rudinazar.com

  • Rino Wijaya

    Bitches, please. If you had to wear this shit to watch TV (or see the
    monitor I’m typing into) you wouldn’t find them so cute or quirky.http://udarino.com/

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  • Neha

    Very informative post. Keep up the good work. I would really look forward to your other posts Satta Matka

  • faizal daffa

    I also really like a pair of glasses, I think that the woman was very beautiful glasses

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