Last week I showcased my effort at
turning a Man Repeller into a Man Getter. As it happens, not even a breast-baring bustier could fix that which my high waisted calf-length skirt black flair skirt did to my body.
This week,
I will showcase my effort at doing something I am likely far more qualified to do. Why, we're turning a Man Getter into a Man Repeller!
After all, repelling is far more fun than getting. Follow me:
Call me. Behold, a leather and jersey blend body-con dress by
Alice & Olivia paired with
Sergio Rossi sky high peep toe pumps.
There are two important things to note here: 1. Being an amazon rocks: my 5'8 physique was all of a sudden standing six feet tall. And 2. this dress reminds me of what my waist line accurately looks like. So do really high waisted trousers though, and in the battle against trousers, I'm sorry leather lasse,
the contraceptive wins.
I intended to go outside and perhaps conduct a little social experiment--see if I could make use of my bikini wax, ride the banana boat, know what I'm sayin? But
I don't fornicate as I've said before: a zebra can't change her stripes. No she can't. So I did what any Man Repeller would do and gave the outfit a little fancy fashionable FLAIR.
One lumberjack, coming right up.
With an XL men's
Gap flannel button up,
Assad Mounser's Moonage Daydream necklace
(it has bullets on it so I can kill you if I want to, but I would never do that because I love you,) lace up combat boots and my hair in a cinnabun, I felt far more comfortable. And cool. And hotTtTtTt. Herein lies the problem.
In case you're wondering about the beauty products on the vanity in front of the brick wall behind me, I have no answers because that shit does not belong to me.
FOCUS PLEASE, I'M TEACHING YOU HOW TO TURN YOUR GETTER INTO A REPELLER.
Actually, that's all. You don't have to focus anymore.
Sooo...did you learn anything...?
...?
....?
.....?
......?
.......?
I learned nothing.
ReplyDeleteInstead, this post was a confirmation. A confirmation that I am indeed on the right track. If I would like some ''space to focus on my career'' and would like to avoid any ''distractions from having a man in my life'', I am definitely, DEFINITELY soooo dressing for success. I rock. YOU rock.
LOVE both looks, btw.
Michelle
whoisbobbparris.blogspot.com
I learned that you have very nice legs and that a lumberjack shirt doesn't change that fact :)
ReplyDeleteCutie patootie...even dressed as a lumber jack.
ReplyDeleteI learned we are the same height, and still wear heals.
ReplyDeleteYou look good in everything
ReplyDelete*poke* stand up straight
I learned that you might be the funniest fashion blogger around. I shared yesterday's post with all my friends that attended yeshivas and they all laughed their butts off.
ReplyDeleteMy partner must lack some important male chromosomes as he thinks your repelling outfits are far hotter.
ReplyDeleteHe does hate drop-crotches, though.....
You look fab in both, but I prefer the flannie.
You know what I learned? That I love your humour. And that you're simply awesome (even with the whole being a man-repeller thing going on). ;-)
ReplyDeleteErghhh spewburger!!
ReplyDeleteYou're a genius! I have to say I like the "man repeller" one better though...
ReplyDeleteWhy did your parents send you to an orthodox Jewish school? Must have been to set you up for a career in comedy 'cos I can't imagine you keeping two sets of dishes! Sadly, you are going to have limited success as a man repeller because you are tall, slim and TOO DARN HOT! Like the man said - you look even better when you add man repelling elements! You have unwittingly started a new MAN REPELLING FETISH WHICH ATTRACTS MEN!
ReplyDeletehahahaha I wear slutty dresses with men's size XL flannel all the time! (I thought it was just me) I think it's more the pulled-back hair that's making it a repeller than anything else. Also I would wear the flannel outfit during the daytime (read: to class) which you obviously couldn't wear the getter one to.
ReplyDeleteHave to say that actually, as Martin Redford stated, you look fine as the "man repeller". Nice post, again :)
ReplyDeleteI love the man repeller outfit way better...I'm so happy to have stumbled upon your blog. First one I see that mixes fashion and comedy, what you write is hilarious
ReplyDeleteYou should write a book
ReplyDeleteLove your blog mucho!
ha! the flannel outfit is basically my everyday look. You're making me feel so much better about dressing like a troll everyday <3
ReplyDeleteI learnt that I'm never going to find a man. I find the second look sooooo much better than the first. I need to get a cat.
ReplyDeletehttp://betweenmargins.blogspot.com
Well but the second look brings to mind Frida Kahlo, and she did quite well with the mens, right?
ReplyDeleteI like your flannel shirt! I think a man would like that if it was his shirt you were wearing....like in "it happened one night" when claudette colbert wears clark gable's pyjama top....
ReplyDeletehaha, you are great :)
ReplyDeleteand you look gorgeous in the dress & pumps.
thanks for making me giggle!
teh equine face and legs like two sticks do more to repel men than the outfits.
ReplyDeletebuffie or toccara could wear librarian glasses and plaid shirts and it would not be enough to ward off admiring looks.
oh wow reading this post i see now exactly what my friends are giving out about when i get sexy-dressed and then apparently 'ruin' myself by morphing into a boy halfway through...i get it now. would not change into identikit-girl for anything though.
ReplyDeletestill you are so stunning with an incredible body, love your blog.
to be frank, the man repeller getup is pretty hott
ReplyDelete